Poetry Blogs (chav)

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We wish you a British Summer

You see the chavs unveiling torsos
Which fashion hair that always grows
The shorts his distant cousin wears
Showing us sights that only scare
The ice cream man appears once more
Serving melting ice cream through his door
You hear the neighbours having a Barbie
An hour or two later they sound rather barmy
The neighbourhood drunk stumbles as usual
And vain young girls become rather delusion...

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bah humbugchavfunnyrhythmsummer

(Not mine, funny anyway), The Chav Prayer


The Chav Prayer
Our father, who are in prison
Mother knows not his name.
Thy Chavdom come, thy shoplifting done, in JJB sports as it is in Poundland.
Give us this day our welfare bread
And forgive us our ASBO's as we happy slap those
Who give evidence against us
And lead us not into employment
But deliver us free housing.
For thine is the chavd...

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Annabel and Dave are sorted

toast the life they always courted

with Johnny Walker Black (imported)

by a geezer in Gibraltar.

Dave’s new boat’s a thirty footer

cowhide seats as soft as butter

room to practice with his putter

cruising down to Malta.

Made his pile in double glazing

take and margins just amazing

dreams of days of golf and lazing

on the Costa’s beac...

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