Hi Lynn, so pleased you enjoyed Sensorial, many thanks for commenting.

Comment is about Lynn Dye (poet profile)

Original item by Lynn Dye

Hi Laura, thanks for commenting on Sensorial, much appreciated.

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Or 'that she'd miss so very much' would work also.

Comment is about Unwound (blog)

Things that go bump (or slither?) in the night.
Who knows what happens when the lamp goes off?
Shades of M.R. James meets Enid Blyton!
M.C.

Comment is about A Silly Goblin Poem (blog)

Original item by Shirley Smothers

I really appreciate the kind comments for this tribute to a great singer/songwriter/poet. And thanks Laura for the info. about Alabama 3. I don't know this band and must do some homework to see if I can locate the song you mention. I did have a recording made (on CD demo) & if I can find a way of uploading it to WriteLoud,I will. I thought better than to use my own voice on it though! As another great star says: A man's gotta know his limitations! Thanks again...M.C.

Comment is about DADDY KNEW JOHNNY CASH (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

A great night and the ideal relaunch last night at the Blind Poet. A chilled audience and relentlessly wonderful words from feature performers Claire Askew, Gavin Inglis and Sophia Walker - not forgetting top-notch open mics from Matt Macdonald, Rachel Amey, Rachel McCrum, Stephen Redman and many, many others. Thanks too to Rose Fraser for getting everyone there to join our email list, Alec Beattie for hosting, and the staff at the Blind Poet who were hospitable and helpful. See you all next month!

By Blind Poetics.

Review is about Blind Poetics on 10 Oct 2011 (event)

I like the tense change. If you didn't want to stress the past tense you could make it more subtle. ie

The baby alarm now silent
and her knitting all unwound

Not sure about the other tweak. Am struggling to remember the original. I'd prefer something that flows a little better, less stuttery - probably cos I'm more of a performance poet ie.

around a false breast on the carpet
that nobody wanted to touch
and her diary with the targets
that she'd missed so very much

I get the play you are making on missed - think it works in past tense also.

These are just suggestions. Sometimes the more you look at stuff, the more you start to doubt what you just thought.... I know you won't be offended by owt though. xx

Comment is about Unwound (blog)

Thanks, Laura, Steve, Isobel. You're right about the 4th verse, Isobel, there were a couple of last minute substitutions which I've amended and I've changed the tenses too. What d'ya think?

Comment is about Unwound (blog)

I enjoyed this too. It's a shame there's no recording. It sounds very lyrical and would perform well.

Comment is about DADDY KNEW JOHNNY CASH (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

She must have been mad to ever consider washing dusters in the first place. Mine get binned. In fact I use old knickers and underpants - which is a load of fun if you forget and leave them haning around!

Everyone else has said the important stuff. Certain moods bring with them intertia that stifles all action. It stops me doing housework many a time... You express that well. xx

Comment is about Unfeeling (blog)

A sad one Ray with lots of images that stay in the mind. I don't normally do critique but I'll make an exception for you :)

I like the first verse very much. Got confused by the change of tenses from past to present in the middle - was that necessary?

I didn't like the false breast verse - thought the last line seemed a forced.

It's a good/original subject to tackle. I often wonder who would have the patience to watch such programmes beyond my own offspring.

Comment is about Unwound (blog)

Hi Andy - thanks for commenting on 'True Love Starts' - I hope your other half enjoys to too! Best wishes, Dave

Comment is about Andy N (poet profile)

Original item by Andy N

...such a pretty name...and you're only scatching the surface!

Well done Isobel.

Augusta xx

Comment is about Chlamydia (blog)

Original item by Isobel

Hi Larisa,

Sorry, I had assumed the question was a rhetorical one.

It was when I saw the picture that I was inspired to pen the poem - the words were already overlaid on it.

The question is really quite a deep one and probably has many answers according to the views of the individual.

However, to me it doesn't seem right to say that love starts nowhere - but you could say 'True love came out of nowhere' which would perhaps be taken to mean much the same as 'Love at first sight'.

Does that help at all?

Best wishes, Dave

Comment is about True Love Starts... (blog)

Original item by Dave Dunn

Welcome to Write Out Loud, Emma!

Comment is about Emma-Jane Stradling (poet profile)

Original item by Emma-Jane Stradling

I like....

Comment is about BERBERIS (blog)

Original item by Emma-Jane Stradling

Hi, Elaine,
Sorry I missed your call. Do try again, or a regular email. This message is via this route as I annihilated my computer the last time I used the 'personal' route with someone else. So now I'm scared to death to try again. Can't afford to jinx my laptop.

Comment is about Elaine (poet profile)

Original item by Elaine

Hi Emma

I like the image your poem draws. Particulaly the culmination in the final verse. It put me in mind of one of my favourite books, 'Siddartha' by Hermann Hesse.

Like you I have never read any of my poems in public. I look forward to reading more of your work.

Comment is about Emma-Jane Stradling (poet profile)

Original item by Emma-Jane Stradling

Beautiful, Kath xx

Comment is about For a moment (blog)

Original item by Kath Hewitt

Thank You Lynn for the kind comments Re 'Blue',

Augusta x

Comment is about Lynn Dye (poet profile)

Original item by Lynn Dye

This word 'somewhere' sounds very uncertain. But...it's just my opinion .

Comment is about True Love Starts... (blog)

Original item by Dave Dunn

perfect Kath. short and sweet

Comment is about For a moment (blog)

Original item by Kath Hewitt

I repeat my question again, but ....in a different form: Is it possible to say in English : A true love starts from nowhere but....after a certain period of time it comes to somewhere. The words were taken from your picture.

Comment is about True Love Starts... (blog)

Original item by Dave Dunn

Hi Jeff

Thanks for your note on Clear Blue Air, appreciate it :)

See you soon x

Comment is about Jeffarama! (poet profile)

Original item by Jeffarama!

You didn't answer my question Dave.

Comment is about True Love Starts... (blog)

Original item by Dave Dunn

I'm a huge JC fan and yup - it totally has the rhythm of one/loads of his songs! I really like this.

Have you heard of a band called Alabama 3? They did a tribute song to JC which was made up of loads of his song titles, clever stuff - it's called Hello I'm Johnny Cash. Bloody brilliant.

Comment is about DADDY KNEW JOHNNY CASH (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

This is really sad Ray, and to my mind, really well written, not bang-on obvious but hinting around the sides sorta thing

Comment is about Unwound (blog)

Mmm, depressive, heavy, really gets the (un)feeling across. Nice one Stella

Comment is about Unfeeling (blog)

Thank you Patricia & Stefan. He is indeed a great companion!

Comment is about He knows! (blog)

Original item by zethembiso mkhize

excellent stuff, dave.. need to show this to my other half - she's a proper romantic - she will love this xx

Comment is about True Love Starts... (blog)

Original item by Dave Dunn

ha ha excellent, lynn.. freaking me out however how near it is in particular when i am seeing christmas cards in the shops already xx

Comment is about Mama Santa (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

the ending adds a nice twist to the rest of the piece, stella (which i enjoyed too of course) but it's top stuff all round xx

Comment is about Unfeeling (blog)

nice stuff, Kath... little change in style I would say for it going even more shorter and shorter here... i think i can see a subtext here which i'll pull up in a pm too but top stuff xx

Comment is about For a moment (blog)

Original item by Kath Hewitt

Hi Ann, thanks for the kind comment, Neil

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Hi Larisa, Thank you so much for your kind comments on 'True Love Starts' - the inspiration for that piece came from the picture I posted with it. :) Best wishes, Dave

Comment is about Larisa Rzhepishevska (poet profile)

Original item by Larisa Rzhepishevska

Enjoyed this; sounds very much in the spirit of A Boy Named Sue. That eternal theme of trying to win a parent's approval.

Comment is about DADDY KNEW JOHNNY CASH (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

I wouldn't like to say that this poem is sentimental. It is more mental It's true, it's sincere. that's why it is so dear.

Comment is about True Love Starts... (blog)

Original item by Dave Dunn

Is it possible to say that true love starts from nowhere but comes to somewhere?

Comment is about True Love Starts... (blog)

Original item by Dave Dunn

Dave! This poem is beautiful! It is so nice! It's just incredible! Love it so much! Can't find the words to express myself! This poem is really one of the best.
Love and hugs,
Larisa

Comment is about True Love Starts... (blog)

Original item by Dave Dunn

Those last two line pack the punch as I guess you wanted..but to be honest I like it without lol..good read either way sir.. :)

Comment is about Eraser (blog)

Hello MC - Thank you for your kind comments on 'True Love Starts' - they were much appreciated. Good luck with your book! Dave

Comment is about M.C. Newberry (poet profile)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Hi Shirley, thanks for your comments. I'd give it a go, it's only 70p or so for 40 such articles in a trashy mag so you can scribble on them until you get summing useful! My book is called 'A Method In My Madness'. You can buy it on Amazon, order it through a book shop using the ISBN or get it from me! :)

Comment is about "Love You Millions" A Cut-Up Type Poem (blog)

Original item by Gemma Lees

Thanks, Stef, but have to admit I never did learn how to play the thing! xx

Comment is about Mama Santa (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

a silk scarf!!!
now come on Lynn-
what can you play on a silk scarf?

'wrapping around the christmas tree' p'raps?

I,ll get me coat-

I,m presently having guitar lessons
-so far I ,ve learned how to
unzip the case-hahaha!

made me 'chorkle L.D.

was gonna say it made me feel highly strung
but I,ve only got one coat-lol!

S+P=xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Comment is about Mama Santa (blog)

Original item by Lynn Dye

Honest sentiment and sentimentality are unrelated. I like this - coming as it does from the heart.
M.C.

Comment is about True Love Starts... (blog)

Original item by Dave Dunn

Franz- the click and the tut have differing sound values- :o)

Comment is about Persephone's Perpetuum (blog)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

Hi Zeth
(please pardon the liberty)

you will never find
a greater companion.

lovely poem.
thank you.

Patricia&Stef.xx

Comment is about He knows! (blog)

Original item by zethembiso mkhize

Mike - thanks for the kind enquiry. Never felt
better! But the imagination is God-given in my
view.
M.C.

Comment is about BE STILL (blog)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Wow! You've done something I've never had the courage to do. Well done.
It flows and reads very well.
Martin mentioned you have a book? Is it listed? I'd like to take a look at it. Cute illustration.

Shirley

Comment is about "Love You Millions" A Cut-Up Type Poem (blog)

Original item by Gemma Lees

Hello Ann, 'Sensorial' just thought i'd let the pen go where it wanted to although originally it began as a 'Men are from Mars' idea. Appreciate your comments thanks.

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove