Thank you, everyone, for your support. It means a great deal to me.
Comment is about Learning to write better poetry - and having a drink - with Carol Ann Duffy (article)
Original item by Greg Freeman
Lovely poem. Amusing and imaginative, decidedly Poe-esque. ' I bade them both goodbye' implies his uneasiness. Don't agree with David's 'knowledge of a potental enemy's arsenal.............'. It's a poem, not a military manual.
Jennifer
Comment is about GROSS ENCOUNTER (blog)
Original item by ray pool
Well, I laughed outright, so it must have spoken to me too.
'Can't I just drown you in a lake' is one of the best lines I've seen in ages. I'm praying you're not serious - just poking fun at yourself, as we all need to do sometimes. And poetry is such a great outlet, both your own and the works of others.
Also: 'Which relationship to forsake' - hilarious!
JEEZ, I really hope you are trying to be funny. And I'm not 'making fun' of your efforts.
Comment is about Lost Souls (blog)
Original item by Wardah
Welcome to WOL, Mr. Varden.
May! and you've written 70 poems already! Good grief. Your brain must be grateful for the release of so many ideas smouldering for so long.
'Truth and Lies' is powerful, like an erratic torpedo. You have a sense of the dramatic.
Please add your own comments on the work of other poets, however short. We all thrive on them. Even the 'LIKE' flower is appreciated.
Comment is about Rick Varden (poet profile)
Original item by Rick Varden
Such an unusual subject, and so inventively developed. The work never lost its intensity from first to last. Much enjoyed.
Comment is about The Builders Yard (blog)
Original item by Rick Varden
A symphony of sound, imagination and imagery. And thought. Thought must come first: no thinking - no need for words. And knowledge, actual knowledge incorporated naturally, pungently, directive-ly.
Oh, never mind - I'm not dead sure what I'm saying, but close.
Comment is about something glows inside all of us (blog)
Original item by Stuart Buck
Thank you for this really descriptive poem which I can relate to. Cheers
Comment is about TIME IS RIGHT (blog)
Original item by lynn hahn
My word, I've read this three times, and it gets better each time. It's disjointed, just like each day/activity seems to be when children are gone, and parents get older.
IMO, just excellent. Great title.
Comment is about UMBILICUS (blog)
Original item by ray pool
Really, really like it. A 'gem' itself. In full sight of us all.
Comment is about The Poet's Christmas (blog)
Original item by Adam Whitworth
Beautifully put; an excellent subject to consider.
May I make one teeny suggestion? Consider: 'is never prudent' which I think gives the idea even more 'power' as 'wise' and 'prudent' are so closely related. I like the way it smacks you. Always with respect. Always.
Please advise if I have missed a subtlety.
Cynthia
Comment is about TIME IS RIGHT (blog)
Original item by lynn hahn
Thanks for those who liked this. Cheers
Fred
Comment is about The Builders Yard (blog)
Original item by Rick Varden
Thu 26th Oct 2017 08:05
Stuart, you are a clever, clever man, this is fantastic,
Lan
Comment is about something glows inside all of us (blog)
Original item by Stuart Buck
Thu 26th Oct 2017 07:54
Ryn
Thu 26th Oct 2017 02:05
I'm sorry about the background noise on the audio - sounds like frying tonight!
Comment is about UMBILICUS (blog)
Original item by ray pool
HI Suki. Yes that is true and gives us more of a broad view of what we didn't know then. I'm pleased you like the reading - Such moments gave me cause to take up music !
Nice to hear that your memories were of a positive take Col. Lots of teachers at my secondary school used to strike us - probably more out of frustration than being planned . The recorders used en masse sounded terrible and had to be dipped in Dettol every lesson. Ghastly old chap!
That sounds rather ritualistic Harry! Horrors of the black museum. I think as long as we knew consequences we weren't damaged by them.
Thanks Stu. It was a bit like a dragon's den but turned out well!
Thanks too Emer and Desmond for your likes!
Ray
Comment is about DUO (blog)
Original item by ray pool
Ah school memories, lets see...
infant's...smacked across the legs ffor not closing my eyes, tight during the lords prayer
Juniors..stevens! Your writing looks like a spider has crawled out of an ink well and walked across the page
Senior school refusing the cane and geting the cane for refusing the cane
Being allowed to perform drama in English lessons by the best teacher by far..then getting groomed in the stock room by the same teacher... he never got me though
Ah school memories...
Comment is about DUO (blog)
Original item by ray pool
Thanks for the kind words ? @abhishek
Comment is about Smile- the facet curve (blog)
Original item by Ankita Srivastava
Here I am again Eric. This seldom happens to me , but WOL is full of nice surprises and keeps us knocking. Very nice to have a reaction and your comment on mine made me realize that poems can dig deep into the mind.
Thank you.
Ray
Comment is about Knighthood (blog)
Original item by Eric Maynard
Hi Philip. Your reading of this simple poem is wonderful and completely beguiling. Truthfully, it does not need writing down once you hear the voice.
Ray
Comment is about Meet me there (blog)
Original item by Phils Words
Now your talkin' am there
Comment is about Things that make me smile!! (blog)
Original item by Burning Aspirations
<Deleted User> (18118)
Wed 25th Oct 2017 17:21
Sounds great.
Hannah
Comment is about Things that make me smile!! (blog)
Original item by Burning Aspirations
Thanks Eric, I do take that poem as a compliment ; it tells its story neatly and reveals what is a personal experience. As for the last few lines in my case this would be straying into a grey area. I usually apply a few drops of fantasy to relieve a monotonous situation.
Ray
Comment is about LOOKING BACK (blog)
Original item by ray pool
Abhishek Shankar
Wed 25th Oct 2017 16:18
Awesome.. Usage of perfect and beautiful words according to the context. U have really made it delicious ❤
Comment is about Smile- the facet curve (blog)
Original item by Ankita Srivastava
ha, so true. I couldn't help myself, so here is my rejoinder:
https://www.writeoutloud.net/public/blogentry.php?blogentryid=71473
If this sort of thing isn't allowed or is considered bad form in the forum (cross posting), just send me a note and I can remove this comment. Really, it's meant as a compliment for compelling me to write ?.
Comment is about LOOKING BACK (blog)
Original item by ray pool
This is a was inspired by /meant as a companion to:
https://www.writeoutloud.net/public/blogentry.php?blogentryid=71323
Comment is about Knighthood (blog)
Original item by Eric Maynard
<Deleted User> (9882)
Wed 25th Oct 2017 12:59
and I echo Fred's word's Wendy.Take care love.
Rose ?
Comment is about Why (blog)
Original item by Wendy Higson
Linda, we all believe in you. You're an extremely talented and an altogether amazing lady. I'm proud to call you my friend!
Comment is about Learning to write better poetry - and having a drink - with Carol Ann Duffy (article)
Original item by Greg Freeman
great imagery martin and a beautiful recollection. bet this sounds excellent live.
Comment is about Tramping (blog)
Original item by Martin Elder
very clever piece, reeks of nostalgia and heady notes played joyfully on well strung instruments. as it were.
Comment is about DUO (blog)
Original item by ray pool
this really is quite wonderful. powerful and heartbreaking. the battenburg is a clever metaphor and i like the way it sits in the background while the straightforward language conveys the strength. beautiful. read it twice.
Comment is about Remembering James (blog)
Original item by Jon Darby
brilliant. i'd vote this for POTW if such a thing was permitted. sort of john cooper-clark meets the divine comedy (the band not the book of course). witty and sad. the perfect match.
Comment is about Drunk in the museum (blog)
Original item by Robert C Gaulke
excellent. reminds me of the band Sikth and the lyrics that are throughout their album The Trees Are Dead & Dried Out Wait for Something Wild. great atmosphere here and i love the brevity of it, says what it needs to say then slips back in to the shadows. excellent. said that twice now.
Comment is about Limbs (blog)
Original item by Sara Dombrosky
this is my favourite kind of POTW. i hardly ever read past the first line or so of 'relationship poetry' (my own snazzy phrase) and had to bring myself to read this through. i found it hugely rewarding once i did so, and thats what POTW does i think. lovely piece.
Comment is about 'Cooling Towers' by Tom is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)
Original item by Greg Freeman
Great work here Tom, brought back many memories for me of the 60s. Many thanks
Comment is about 'Cooling Towers' by Tom is Write Out Loud's Poem of the Week (article)
Original item by Greg Freeman
Thanks Emer and Malika for liking and Thanks to Colin, Lan Ray and David for commenting
Glad you appreciated it Col it does in fact have memories of the south Downs as well as other parts of Sussex near my Gran's house just outside of Burgess Hill for me. I still like to go on the downs when I can if I get the opportunity to visit my mum.
yeah Lan
I am afraid I could never leave those blisters alone. If I am honest I still can't!
Ray I am glad you liked it . You are right I do seem to be rather caught up with the past and my boyhood at the moment
Thanks for your reading and comments David it is always a pleasure to get comments from yourself as well as all the other fine poets who are listed below.
Thank you all once again I am humbled by your acceptance of my work
Martin
Comment is about Tramping (blog)
Original item by Martin Elder
Really enjoyed this down to earth realistic piece. Thank you.
Fred
Comment is about Why (blog)
Original item by Wendy Higson
Tue 24th Oct 2017 18:56
Thanks Col,I’m on a paddle steamer,steaming somewhere down the river time.
Comment is about Traveller (blog)
Original item by DESMOND CHILDS
Tue 24th Oct 2017 18:15
Hi Saniya
Well crafted poem...I especially love the line " I can be ,I can find me, I can breathe and I can live."
A real sense of hope here.
Well done
Comment is about Light (blog)
Original item by Saniya
<Deleted User> (5011)
Tue 24th Oct 2017 17:22
As Nicola says, we are all proud of you (and always were). Excellent piece too. I look forward to the next instalment.
Comment is about Learning to write better poetry - and having a drink - with Carol Ann Duffy (article)
Original item by Greg Freeman
Ray, when this happened to me it was the headmistress
.She produced the cane, bent me over a little chair, and gave me a good whacking (for sagging school for six weeks)...sadly it was fully deserved.
Comment is about DUO (blog)
Original item by ray pool
<Deleted User> (5011)
Tue 24th Oct 2017 17:18
And you, Judy, when reviewing, are like Greg Freeman with a scalpel. Terrific piece. Glad I wasn't there.
Comment is about Posh new publisher, same brilliant Hollie McNish (article)
Original item by Greg Freeman
Written in response to a theme of alienation. The Church can sometimes isolate the people it says it's reaching out to.
The person this poem was inspired by thought he'd found a place of acceptance initially after many long,sad,lonely years.
Sad to say this kind of treatment is far more widespread than we sometimes understand it to be.
Comment is about Remembering James (blog)
Original item by Jon Darby
Hi Andy
Love this poem...great picture too. I find family memoirs like this fascinating. It made me laugh and made me reminisce similar times in my own family.
Love this part in particular, " I had been crying my eyes out, wanting to be in one of those boxes". Also,beautiful language here; " Each tear imprinting itself in the shadows of the alleyway,At the back of where we once lived".
A touching piece.
Comment is about Sister in a box (blog)
Original item by Andy N
Harry O'Neill
Thu 26th Oct 2017 14:38
Chris,
congratulations on the sonnet form of this, It makes
the points made clearer.
I like the clear abruptness of those first two lines , which then proceed a (warningly?) through the experiences of our own `private` rooms, the ends in a kind of misty world.
The form enables the power of that;
`Be wary of the `Fire ` of triumphs won`
(as it raises the plane of the whole poem)...It`s a gift from the past,
(as someone nearer the door now, I am personally very grateful for the presence of that word `Hope` between
Faith and Charity.) .
Comment is about The Fire and the Rose (blog)
Original item by Chris Hubbard