Love

Can you love without loyalty?

Is loyalty worthy without love?

I guess some people to-and-fro with the answers

Until push comes to shove

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The Language We All Know

Hola

Labas

Sveiki

Ahoj

Talofa

Merhaba

Salut

Oi

A flood of colours 

A sea of sounds

Every kind of footstep

Forges a unique track on the ground

I believe it is true

Yet it sounds almost absurd

That one can communicate a hundred things- through their face and hands

And verbalising just a single word

Our ea...

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What Drives Loyalty

I’ve learned that loyalty

Can be a beautiful quality

When harnessed in the right way

But it can also keep us in situations and relationships

That make our values sway

As a little girl and a teenager

I desperately wanted to be Lily’s best friend

In fact, I wished I could be her 

My hypnotised devotion had no end

Until one day I realis...

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It Takes One

It takes one to make you their wife

It takes one to try and ruin your life

It takes one to be by your side

It takes one to be a reckless guide

It takes one to sign a contract

And one to take it away

It takes one to show you love

And one to mess up your day

It takes one to reciprocate your care

Or take advantage of you because you are kind

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 The Bridge

 Australia says NO to violence against women

We WON’T tolerate bullying in the health force 

We will not let this be

That’s what I thought too

Until it happened to me

‘You get what you give’

A motto I’d say it’s mostly true

But sometimes people will find a way to try and make you suffer

No matter what good you do

So I tried not to take it pe...

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The Mirror You Can’t Hold

Rejection, deflection

Projection, projection

A profuse push of blame

With profound misdirection

Mirror, mirror on the wall

Who is the most insightess of them all?

You say it is me?

No —  it  just could not be!

I am the truth

So why can’t you see?!

Everyone has done me wrong

My feelings are because —  of what you —  put me thro...

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The Magic in Mundane

Rolling rolling 

Rumble rumble

With all this weight

I’m sure to stumble

Vibrations buzzing

From my knuckle

Then down my arm

With a smoothly structured handle

Caressed in my palm

Blot Blot Blot

Bumpety-bump

Give yourself a stretch

Get those muscles pumped

Kookaburras say hello

The sun says

‘I’m here to kick your ars...

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Still Here

An ex engineer

With the bushy mustache and thick glasses

 To accompany your position

A profession that saved your life— time and time again

And gave your drive and your vision 

A narrative of ‘I’m not lonely’

But you’ll talk my ear off every session

Keen to learn about therapy techniques

Simply because of the structure and the framework in the lesson

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All Roads Lead to You

People told me it was possible

They said 'you'll know when it feels right'

They didn’t tell me there would be a struggle in finding it

Paved by constant disappointment  and spite

Drowning in a sea of confusion

Smashed by perilous waves of doubt

I realised I would first have to love myself 

To be able to survive and get out

And then I ...

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My Ticket Out

Friendships once delicious

Now turned stale

Intimacy— which was invigorating

Now holding the same energy and delivery

Of a sickly snail

Interests— previously exciting

That are no longer fun

A place that felt like home

Has become a web 

Thats overspun

When before

You would have fought to stay

Now you have the compulsion

To escape and...

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Covet

It seems as though

We will always desire

Things we aren’t meant to touch

Because they’re so damn hot

That they burn like fire

Would we still want to go there?

If it was not dangerous or forbidden?

These feelings are often so intense

Because they have to be locked away or hidden

If we decide to cross the line

Like the moth to a flame

Relief then d...

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The Self — Fulfilled Prophecy

Baby— I know they hurt you bad

It makes me mad

 That one person's actions

Could leave you feeling— so small and sad

My darling— it’s not just my view 

How you were treated— was not your fault

Please belief this

It’s true

But you can’t shake it

You think the way they behaved

Was because of you

You were made to question ever...

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These Jeans Do Well

My grandmother's expression

Shown through her hands

My father's habit

Of fitting in too many plans

My sister’s sass

My brother’s mystery

Scars and strength

Filtered down

From a refugee history

My mother's eyes

And ability to connect

My cousins' approach

To love and live without regret

Our pagan leaves

And celtic vines

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Just Show Up

Job promotions

Given to people either great or corrupt

Major sporting medals

All achieved

Just because they showed up

They weren't the best

Or the worst

But they put their hat in the ring

And that placed them first

Whether it be love, ambivalence or disgust

Or whatever the fate

Even while feeling inadequate— or arriving a few minutes late

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The Back Up Choice

Meaningful conversations continuing for days

Routine—dates—and times

Dissolving in to a haze

Cocktail bars

Fireworks—Metaphorical and real

Wonderous connection

Hard to conceal

A  commitment made to a friend—the potential lover

Living so far away

While holding the hand— of another

And asking them to stay

I guess we all want to ha...

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If You’d Known

If you’d known it would end in heartache

Would you go on the first date?

Would you ask that person to be your friend?

If there was a chance it would lead to hate?

Would you set up your own business?

With the knowing it could fail?

Would you cancel your long awaited road trip?

With the forecast it may hail?

It turns out— you’d do all these th...

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The Rona Effect

Brain that feels like hollow

Night sweats and body aches

With mash potato body to follow

Ten hours sleep

But still so hazy

Unable to focus

Like I’m halfway between hungover and crazy

Hacking cough and congestion

Mental health in question

More sleep please

Oh wait— no— I’m wired

How is my body blocking my zzzz’s

When I’m so damn ...

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A Portal to My Past

When I was eighteen

We met at a club through a mutual friend

We kissed, danced, laughed and smiled

We wouldn't let the night end

I liked you

And you liked me

But not in the way— that I wanted you to

And when it ended —you were honest 

In a way— no man has ever been honest with me before

I respect you for that now—but my eighteen year old ...

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It’s Time to Leave

Not happy while I’m in this

But feeling too trapped to leave

This working relationship

Feels like DV

I need the same love and care

That I give to this service

But I’m unappreciated and micromanaged

And I just don’t deserve this

A mental health organisation 

That won’t reduce my work hours

Not even with a medical certificate from my...

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Burnt Toast

You smile—I smile

You laugh —I laugh

‘You seem ready to meet the love of your life’

‘I am—I don’t do things by halves’

‘I want it all’

‘So do I’

‘What brings you joy? And what makes you cry?’

‘Kindness is so important’

‘I think so too’

‘You seem like the real deal, sir’

‘And so, do you’

I thought you were a knight, sir

A quiet success th...

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A Dream Come True

I loved writing

I really did

I guess I’ve stayed somewhat creative

And driven since being a kid

As an adult I took a cross road

I wanted to be a writer

But the field of journalism seemed to be faced with

Dicey ethics and uncertainty

A career of nursing seemed brighter

And then I became a:

Nurse— writer

Surfer— fighter

I realis...

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Advice to my younger self

Dear Rasa,

I’m gifting you, some words of advice to your beautiful teenage self, who just can’t see the whole truth in some things right now.

 Be kind to your parents and teachers. They are trying the best they can.

Know that good looks and popularity seem really important right now, but longer term, you’ll realise that other things are muc...

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We Make Mud 

You pretend

I pretend

We all pretend 

That it's all fine

Underneath— angst is brewing 

But we try our best

To both appear kind 

You pushed

And pushed

And I pushed back

I think that you see white

You think 

That I see black

From other planets

But bound by blood

I am the rain—you are the soil

Without intent...

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Freedom

I'm moderately happy

It's easy and stable

But I'm owned— and controlled

I work for them— and not for me

The stability has kept me chained in golden handcuffs— for too long

I can't stay here forever

It's not within my values system

And with the leap I make

The unknown—the risk I choose to take

I embrace freedom

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Complex creature 

How can someone understand me?

If I cannot understand myself?

I can keep the dark feelings at bay

If I don’t share them with anyone else

People think I have it together

But man, they’ve got it wrong

Maintaining a certain facade 

One I’ve kept going— for so long

I’m a complex creature, dear

Made of many things

Not quite sure of who I...

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Tears

When I was a kid 

At church

A family friend played the violin

And what I heard was both a beautiful and profoundly sad melody

And while the priest passed the holy sacrament to the parishioners 

I didn't even realise that I was crying

But I was

Why was no one else crying?

Were they affected by the music in this way?

‘Hey’

 My Dad consoled me with his hand...

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Dear Mama Bear,

Words cannot describe

The joy that you bring to all our lives

A woman so strong and humble— with endless compassion 

A total babe

With a strong sense of fashion

Then add…

Intelligence, creativity and humor

Together— these qualities are hard to find

Our dear darling mama

Is one of a kind

Our rock

Our glue

That wo...

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That poor man

My colleagues only spoke of their annoyance with you

I was told that you were pretty cheeky

(To say the least)

 When you were elevated

Grandiosity at its best

Somewhat sleazy

Bragging

And unable to interrupt

The first time I met you—in the hospital

I couldn’t help but find you so damn likable

You socialised with all the other patients

You...

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Where Did The crazy Acts of Passion Go?

At age fourteen

Scotty engraved Sarah's name in to his arm

They were not together

They'd never kissed

Or even held hands

Sarah didn't see him 

In the way that Scotty saw her

She cared for him as a friend

Bit it didn't change how much Scotty loved her

He told me once— at recess

That the scar on his arm...

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Bus Crush

Oh— how handsome and mysterious you are

So I try to imagine what your story is

While knowing absolutely nothing about you— from afar

What keeps your wheels turning— by day and by night?

How do you move beneath the sheets?

What makes you cry and what gives you delight?

So maybe you are not that cute— but I’m forced to sit still right now…

So day...

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Take me on

You think you’re gonna crush me bitch?

Well guess what— I’ve got my boxing gloves on too

You try to intimidate me

But you don’t

I know it’s hard for you to hear this

But I’m just as strong and determined as you

You’ve met your match

I’ll up the ante when I need to

And I’ll dig my heels in

Step up bitch— I’m ...

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Beautiful things

It takes a second to pause

To be able to realise and see

That no matter where I am

There are beautiful things around me

A dragonfly sits in my crepe myrtle tree

Practically masked

Wings that mimic crystal

A torso that resembles coloured glass

For a second, I don’t know that he is there

Appearing as though he is both flying and sleeping 

In mid...

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The Tide is Turning

The news that is broken

When you know someone has to leave

Is hard to hear

But waiting for them to leave

When the news is understood

Is harder

Reminding ourselves that the person who we care about

Is not going on a one way trip to the moon

And knowing we will see them again

Provides some comfort

But does not fully take away the st...

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Two women

Two women

Both nurses

Who know that while at work

They must joke— rather than cry

As a way to cope 

With the chaos

That is their normal day to day 

They will talk

Superficially

About plans for the weekend

The weather

And complement each other’s outfits

They are positive encounters

Warm and kind

Congenial

But not with any dept...

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Mend me

You’re looking for an answer

Someone to fill that gap

Someone who loves you

Who won’t treat you like crap

And I want it too

Don’t we all

Someone who truly adores us

Despite our baggage and flaws

You said ‘you don’t have the best of me’

And I sadly agree

But I can’t fix you

We need to do that mending ourselves

Can’t you see?

So t...

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Covid Blues

No hugging

No handshakes

Keep your distance

Essential visits only

No more than a group of two

Elbow tap

Foot tab

For the COVID blues

Then chuck your shirt in the wash

And disinfect your shoes

Shelves in shops

Are empty of toilet paper and pasta

Copycats panicked by apocalyptic mania

Buy in excess— and do it faster and faster

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So she let the rain set in

Alas

When we had nearly given in

Mother nature

Decided she could absolve us from our sins…

So she let the rain set in

Her eyes did not water lightly

Instead— she wept a river

She gave us more than we deserved

More than what we thought—she could deliver

Everlasting daisies and orchids emerged

In abundance— on the once bone-d...

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Fire

Fire.

An element that was historically used for warmth

 To cook food

And for protection

And now—  our primal instincts are still drawn to the flames

Campfires provide a haven (on our terms)

 Where we can sit together—and feel a strong connection

In Australia, we have natural fire

That we usually accept and manage

But this time was different

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Cosmetic Colouration

I try to show to you my prettiest feathers

I cock my head up

Can’t you see my confidence

That I’m desperate to portray?

I’m trying to catch your attention 

Trying to appear utterly desirable

Yet despite my best attempts

You still won’t look this way

No longer relaxed

Feeling inadequate

And therefore—acting quite grandiose

This...

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The Ring

No one forced me to be here

And yet— here I am

Time—and time—again

Constantly covered in bruises

Abrasions

Recovering from a broken nose

But— I still want to be here

‘Relax your shoulders’

The coach directs

I’m not even aware

That my arms are tense

Getting in to the ring

Not giving up

Fighting back

Respecting one’s opponent

C...

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Beep! Beep! Cheap! Cheap!

‘Next please’

The woman smiles

But I’m one step ahead

On the other side

Bags open

One hand looped through the handle

The other on the counter

We clock eyes

I submit a creak of a smile back

But I need to stay focused

The race is on

That woman lifting my can of tuna

Is also rearing to go

It wasn’t easy — you know

F...

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Goodbye, dear friend

As adults we adventured in to the sea

Clumsy

Intimidated

Determined

And having so much fun

No one else was bothered

To learn such a difficult skill

To take the long drive from our town

Just to be in the water for—a day

But you did

And so

Our journey together moved forward

We started in the shallows

And with ti...

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Moments like this 

The endless list of things to do

Are finished!

Well, they’re not

They’ve been abandoned —at least for now

A chance to breathe 

As we sit in the sun

Drinking tea

This time— is golden and sacred

The working week ahead will bring

Routine— responsibilities

Time restrictions 

And stress

But right now

We have a chance

To...

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My Ocean Dream

Sometimes when life is rough

We cast our mind to a special place

A dream

Where things feel a little more wholesome— with a little less edge

 —and things are a little less tough

And this is where I go

Where the sand meets the sea

Where rugged rich formations— are cushioned by giant and lush tropical trees

The sky is blue— the sun smiles

An...

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My sea change

Out of the bush

And in to the sea

Wondering where belonging— belongs for me

From the straight arrow freeway

To a road with a sudden bend

In some ways— it feels like the beginning

In other ways— like it’s the end

I tell everyone that where I’m heading 

Involves only a day of driving 

To make it sound easy

Six hundred and sixty six k...

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Dear Human from ‘The Cat’

Dear overworked, stressed and tired human, 

Why do you rush around all day?

Your timetable should revolve

Around eating, sleeping, cuddles and play

Napping for 12-16 hours a day is ideal

Break it up with a snack

Catch a rat

See how good it feels

When it comes to eating

Don’t feel restricted by the diets others suggest

Stick ...

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I choose now

When I’m well-travelled

When I’m cultured

When I’ve achieved a lot

I’ll look good on paper

And I’ll be on top

When I have credentials— lots of money

My dream career

A house— a husband and

kids…I’ll be set in to gear

And until then...

I’m trying to tick all the ‘achievement’ boxes now

In hope to better aid myself for down the trac...

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Waiting to fly

People run to terminals

As best as they can —while dragging heavy bags

Others sleep

Or are zoned in to their screens and books

Like robots

Elevator music playing

Passengers in waiting— tiredly window shopping 

With no clear intent or interest

What time is it?

Doesn’t matter—you are in another country anyway

Hungry?

Not sure

So you buy...

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A woman— has needs— you know

It’s not just men—who fantasise about sex

I need some proper loving

To put my body into check

I want someone who respects me

Who’ll look deep into my eyes

I want them to understand who I am

And to be smart—and kind

And wise

But the latter is hard to find— you know

And meanwhile— my body aches

So put me on the kitchen counter p...

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Forever blue

Behind a bubble of glass—someone knocks and calls my name

Their voice is muffled

My hearing— dulled from the pain

I guess I’m here

But— not really

This melancholie ache

Means I cannot think clearly

People move with purpose

Their lives seem so together

While I’m stuck down a dark well

That goes on forever

Others say they’ve been t...

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