It was a public madness:
comments not making sense, snow-flaking words on photos shared by friends of friends.
Oblique comments passed by lookers on. ‘WTF’s she on about?’ and ‘get her tole’ and passive vaguings mentioning getting better for the kids.
And I sit and mourn her while she lives. Watch it huge and vast.
Remembering my own lost year
and feel a little anxio...
Monday 24th October 2011 2:13 pm
The lid is fast,
grimed with dust and age
polish and grease.
If I could open it,
Hope would fly free,
in an exhaled sigh of moths and grit.
It would catch the throat with incense.
So I content myself with tracing round the carvings,
place my fingers where the brailled blind once did
sit with itchy legs on cut moquette
Tuesday 26th April 2011 11:51 am
A prettiness that was plain beauty
till the flowering season wilted.
But it didn’t matter
that your skin grew parched
and stretched and tanned
and pounced and quilted
by the sunray pleat of wrinkles.
If there was room for flounces or a gem
a turn of lace, a froth of sequinned flair
a dotting of French knots on
skin, a surface brown and bare,
for a sp...
Wednesday 6th April 2011 10:29 am
sun splattering us in technicolour,
stained with light
migraine hue at the edges
hearts beat faster
minds and eyes pinpoint
to infinite acuity
heads swell with
chests strain from
heads back and
Tuesday 29th March 2011 1:13 pm
We are snug blanketed under a layer, thick and soft
the wreck of the garden beautified by it
the rooves insulated
gate iron curlicued
thickened in outline
a stuttering blurred underlining
Walking and feeling the tense squeak
unfamiliar gait to ache our thighs
we are un-gendered,
crack of face, eyes skenning
Tuesday 21st December 2010 8:28 am
I saw her heart break yesterday
the watchful face of late
smile that had only known sunshine
and said in words
careful and rounded
the news that he would not be coming home
trembling of the tiny chin
the mouth turned square and agonised
in an eternal instant of distress
I heard the clic...
Friday 22nd October 2010 7:00 am
When we’ve spent the night separately, each seething in our cold sheets
and when this morning has been vitriol splashed and unthinkables thought
when a friend or two has been informed
though not the kids yet,
is it so damned hard to save the change?
The finality, blunt and electronic of:
your relationship will be cancelled when you press SAVE.
Friday 22nd October 2010 6:55 am
The death throes are the most painful,
agonal breaths uttered over coffee,
silence filled with quiet recrimination and the ticking clock,
step sitting, eyes distant,
gazing at the horizon. Cold.
Chests suffused with unsaid words
head filled with unsaid thoughts,
eyes with standing water.
Heart leaping at the possibility of reprieve.
Death is dragging her heel...
Wednesday 13th October 2010 11:30 am
Bleached out happy snaps
in seventies colours
kids in swimsuits a truer red
an empty glass
thin film of wine grains stuck
put down again.
Fingers tremulously tap
delete, tap, delete
finger hovering over
Wine making bolder
Sunday 5th September 2010 12:14 pm
Ah, I can’t force tears
I have my own to get on with
looking back resentful
and dragging it with me still.
loaded with skins and burnt out bodies
reeking of sin.
I can own the shame
the neon phallus, the drink,
the scars on my fat white wrists.
It lingers in my insecurity
the worry I will ...
Thursday 2nd September 2010 10:21 pm
We braved the wasps and nettles,
feet fearing the moist scrabble of tiny frogs
and came home
with bags of dripping berries.
Elicited nods from sweet old ladies
and questions of recipes.
Oh I scored points for making jam not pies.
To see my babies lined up
To see the sun slant through the ruby
Friday 20th August 2010 9:36 am
In the drab walled room in the attic
I peer from the spotted mirror
in the cavernous dressing table.
Out of the sooty window
the ice of muslin flapping wetly
the street all oil cloth and patent roofs
I am corset bound and flesh-pinched
white and soft above and below
all singed curls and droppered earrings,
hiding the disease...
Tuesday 13th July 2010 11:41 am
Curing poetry is an inexact science
not quite an art neither.
The men and women tut and nod
at what I have to say
they feign their interest
and scribble things I cannot see
I think they think I think too much
and I think that they are right
they give me pills to numb .
I think it’s working.
Words that wracked me a month ago
now barely leave a di...
Tuesday 13th July 2010 10:26 am
Apologies Francine for my dreadful French but I have a little announcement:
This afternoon at 3pm I will be plugging Wordsoup and it's 1st birthday party (tuesday 20th at the Continental) as I have a poem to be published in it's upcoming anthology, I will hopefully (amid my inane chattering and nervous giggling and dreadful faux-pas) get the chance to read a poem too..
If you want to ...
Monday 19th April 2010 9:51 am
my darling of three spring times
climb in with me, in the morning early
when woke from dreaming or from birdies chorus
And I fold you into me.
The coldest parts of you,
though torture to my sleep warm flesh,
I suffer gladly
to make you warm again.
Your frozen feet allowed to
kick into my doughy tum
your hands, reach for my armpits
Monday 5th April 2010 8:35 pm
The dints of last week’s walk
still scar the turf
a white scratch
which raised sparks
a scrape, a scuff of ill planned heel
The frog had gone,
an obscenity of frogspawn in it’s place
gazing blandly up
with a thousand jelly eyes.
was still there
the long thigh bones
the scraps of fur
an eye, bla...
Sunday 28th March 2010 12:14 am
The sunken, frosted chest that once hung meat
weighed down with metal on Remembrance Day
frail tortoise necked and rheumy eyed
he couldn’t watch the
Sea Cadets Band,
watch the Jacks
lollipopping on the Glockenspiel
and cocky eyes
white gaiters flashing
without nodding back the tears remembrance brings
Sunday 28th March 2010 12:11 am
These lies and half truths
build a wall more concrete
redder than Accrington brick.
If I were to pound them with my futile fists
I’d bleed sooner.
So I don’t
but half asleep
watch them build
brick on brick,
lie on lie,
till I can’t breathe.
Will Ivy ever grow between the cracks
(smaller than th...
Sunday 7th March 2010 2:56 pm
An early morning bath.
Sluiced and powdered,
hair in rags the night before.
And don’t you DARE get them wet.
Shimmying on stiff white petticoats,
ankle socks smelling of sunlight,
new shoes for the occasion,
pearlised to match the missal and the rosary.
Then the crowning moment,
everybody holds their breath as the dress is lifted from it’s vinyl shroud.
Sunday 7th March 2010 1:19 pm
I have seen Elvis in my mirror.
Not the blue-black-haired sexy Elvis:
piercing eyes, taut skin reflecting the neon of a setting southern sun,
but the other one.
Fat, pig jowled.
cheeks like slabs of something dead.
Eyes like fish,
surprised to be set in something quite so bloated.
Left in a jar too long.
My lips hang loose
as if too tired to ...
Saturday 27th February 2010 10:25 am
Oh but I would hold you all
coiled warm like viscera
in the dark of my gut
oh but I would tie you up
all of you hobbled by prayer
tight roped bound to me
to keep you safe from death and life
oh but I would hold your
sleep flushed heads and
down on my ample thighs
and shield your eyes from the bad th...
Saturday 27th February 2010 10:20 am
Vinyl bright, wipe-clean tea cloths of names,
women in technicolour dresses,
arms soft and round and brown,
a basketful of fruit for you,
a promise in a full red lip and white, wet teeth.
Oh how mis-named
for seal grey bullets
smaller than a trawler.
Like tiny things
upon a board of battleships.
Just 2 squares,
just 2 co-ordinates
and you'd ...
Sunday 21st February 2010 4:02 pm
Monday 15th February 2010 7:50 pm
In response to Deborah Jordan's beautiful poem.
She's smart is Ronan
in more ways than one.
Not only can she open a door with one
and sit on Chris's bladder
to rouse him from sleep
far more ably than I.
But she's beautiful too-
in the Felix Mode
But her black is deep polish
and her white,
that of the
chalk the big bad w...
Sunday 14th February 2010 3:53 pm
Tracks all covered with a flourish
He’d prepared, deliberated
Took a trifle dish on Friday
With a promise of it Monday
That was that.
Knowing well that in the meantime
I would not expect to see him,
Knew his time frame int-i-mately
Knew I’d wonder at the trifle
And not him.
Instead I invented reasons
For the making of a puddin...
Wednesday 10th February 2010 11:06 am
I cannot speak to you.
You cannot hear my words.
You are there.
Even in this bright sun I can see your shape and
I can smell you child.
I may thirst.
I may need embraces.
Look at my eyes,
they do not work as windows,
the skin has grown over
but they can still serve as
See, if I furrow here
And pull my cheeks towards the...
Friday 5th February 2010 10:29 am
You move like Mowgli,
my wild girl.
Leapfrogger of bollards,
runner with your school socks
Oh writer of tiny most miniature love notes
to your friends
Don't stop singing,
in your nasal way, off key,
the narration of your life
when you think that no-one's listening.
Tuesday 2nd February 2010 12:10 am
ribbing over The Golden Rivet
and who was Blossom giving it to tonight?
A sudden screech
and thirty sunbrowned arms
shielding Pale Northern Eyes
from the burning sun.
And sommat's comin'
kicking the fanny over
sluice with soapy bubble of
rum and oil and water.
And man the fuckin' gun Tom.
Man the fuckin' gun.
Monday 25th January 2010 10:23 pm
It was exquisite,
A satin finish
Like lightly oiled plasticine
Not quite gloss
Just enough lubrication
To leave a fraction of friction
So the frisson
Of it’s exit was palpable
Turd doesn’t cover it.
A light tan,
And tapered towards the end-
Not snapped off
Before it’s time.
It smelt of Indian
But merely a hint
Sunday 24th January 2010 3:45 pm
Another deviation from the norm for me. Slightly silly and if anyone can help me slip in the word fellatio I'd be ever so grateful! By the way I'm gonna pronounce patio as Payshio I think! Be brutal, it's character building for me!
House Porn (written while watching Grand Designs.....Mmmmm)
I watch the house porn
Get Real Wet
For the cathedral ceilinged kitchen neat
Monday 11th January 2010 11:02 am
This is a deviation from the norm for me. This year, one of my resolutions was to attempt writing in different styles. This is an attempt at rhyme. Don't think it sticks very rigidly to the pattern, but it's an experiment. I think it's a little clumsy personally, hmmm....need practice! Any advice much welcomed.
The subject matter is real life, my late granddad sent home letters to my grandma when...
Thursday 7th January 2010 2:14 pm
(a very silly poem about snow )
Saturday 2nd January 2010 12:41 pm
Monday 28th December 2009 12:05 pm
Her eyes fast forward through the scenes she's played.
A warm and milk rimmed baby boy, sleep slack against her shoulder as she hefts him for a burp.
A sturdy legged toddler kicking round a ball, skenning against the sun
A leggy youth awkward in his best shirt smiling, shoulder shelfing on his mum,
A son to grow, to outgrow her.
All halted like the stopping of a little clock.
Saturday 19th December 2009 6:29 pm
Not of the Christmas variety though....
Saturday 19th December 2009 5:56 pm
Monday 14th December 2009 11:05 pm
Monday 14th December 2009 10:57 pm