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Tommy

Tommy the turkey was tired totally tired, it's true as his tribe  - being tremendously tasty - tended to top the menu   Tom started out pretty tranquil He was quite the traditional type But rightfully got in a temper at some of that thanksgiving hype   He seemed to ge...

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Covid Hair

There really wasn't any "if"
I'd ever get a lockdown quiff
No matter if I'd care to whinge
I had no fear of Covid fringe

Nor could I truly be afraid
of hair too much to bun or braid
or control with any kind of caper
an Ivy League or fade and taper

I'm pretty sure that most can tell
that slicked-back wouldn't suit me well
Colouring is not my style
A Mohawk wouldn't make me smile

I...

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The Good Place

(or "An Atheist in Heaven")

My journey's end was all too fast
I saw the bus, but damn and blast
my foot still stepped right off the kerb
and as it did, I found the nerve
to swear a bit and gasp and sigh
"God help me" was my last breath's cry

A selfish gesture, I'll admit
but there was no time for better wit
I was pretty sure my little plea
would not be made to come to be
when that b...

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Bamboozled

I'm not sure what your aim was
or if you meant just what you said
But you've sent my eyes a-squinting
left and right inside my head

You've got me fairly flummoxed
and you've furrowed my flustered brow
I'm slightly bewildered and baffled
like a flabbergasted striped cow

You've sent me on the back foot
at a loss, unstuck and unglued
At sixes and sevens and out to lunch
puzzled, unzipp...

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She was a Phoenix and He was a Vampire

She was a Phoenix and he was a Vampire
Both had inner passions they shared with delight
Although their relationship’s subject to satire
Their love was a fine blend of fire and fright

They rejoiced in the twilighted moments of gloaming
But they’d not wander out and about for too long
‘Cos he’d find his appetite grow whilst out roaming
And she would ignite and flame out a bit strong

She ...

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Snollygaster

I am not a snollygaster
I'm a snollygaster's son
And I'm only gasting snollies
'til the snollygaster comes

You could call me a curmudgeon
I'm a scrimping-saving mite
Accuse me of being "watchful"
and I'll cheer in sheer delight

But I’ll not go cheese a-paring
- that could never be my fate
If you find me paring cheeses
you've arrived a bit too late

Never tell me that I'm chary
I'...

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I Only Have Eyes For Ewe

I look at you and can but smile
and stand so smitten for a while
Your bleating sweetly does beguile;
I only have eyes for ewe

You always light up any field
You're so well-hooved and so well-heeled
Those shapely fetlocks make me yield
I only have eyes for ewe

You really do show style and sass
while ruminating on the grass
I wish I had your taste and class
I only have eyes for ewe

...

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So Help Him, God

There it is -
he's in

And, at 5pm, I took a celebratory drink.

I had aimed to be taking the first sip, immediately following the words
"So help me, God"
But in my haste not to soak in too much alcohol, news and drama
I set my alarm for 4.45pm (GMT)

I joined the live stream just before his speech
And was not disappointed

- what fine words and sentiments
Passionate, well crafted 
...

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