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clarissa mckone

Wed 19th Nov 2008 00:41

I know men get abused, but I have to say I have seen more females put up with this behavior from men. I know that I have put up with some of it. But hitting crosses the line.There is a girl I work with that is about to be fired, because her boy friend does this stuff, and then she cant work.We all feel bad for her and have tried to help her, she always says no.Can your friend just leave?Or video it?

Comment is about Hello darling, I'm home again (blog)

Pete Crompton

Wed 19th Nov 2008 00:39

Hi Love
no and yes.
its totally up to the reader to make it out.
however
its to do with social groups

sometimes I just write even if it just makes no sense, just so I can get it off my mind, its often subconcious stuff, this I think is about trying hard not to bitch about people.

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Pete Crompton

Wed 19th Nov 2008 00:36

went down well in Bolton, changed it a little

Comment is about self scan (blog)

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clarissa mckone

Wed 19th Nov 2008 00:36

Hum, Im unsure if this is about spores.But if it is, well it wont hurt you unless you eat them. I would say wash them up, with bleech or vinager. This is a clever poem, to be sure! I never saw a spore dressed in flannel, and Im glad. I cant say as I much care for flannel myself, unless its very cold, then it may be nice to have. Good write, very exciting story about those spores!

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clarissa mckone

Wed 19th Nov 2008 00:20

oh thats so sad, no one should have to deal with that.I could over look once, if it was not serious in nature. But to put up with it all the time. Im sorry for your friend. Nice poem, nice write.

Comment is about Hello darling, I'm home again (blog)

Pete Crompton

Wed 19th Nov 2008 00:17

I like the whole wild horses idea.
This is a very vivid poem and instantly conjured some bizarre and fantasy styled pictures in my minds eye, its very rabbit in headlights for me, the rabbit the startled snapshot of thought, not wanting to get tamed, caught or written down, elusive these creature comfort thoughts, the poem has its own edge of frustration built in, I'm assuming, or rather, it seems fitting that the very act of commenting on the creative process and its fragility will be reflected, suppose that was inevitable Dave. Its brilliant and vivid, original and wild. As Julien points out, the intervention taints the purity, however what can we do.

the other beasts that like to be before the spotlight, have you looked deeper into their eyes? seen how scared they really are?

brilliant Dave

Comment is about The Writing Class (blog)

Original item by Dave Morgan

Pete Crompton

Tue 18th Nov 2008 23:51

for my friend.

Comment is about Hello darling, I'm home again (blog)

Pete Crompton

Tue 18th Nov 2008 23:43

bloomin heck you get around you lucky swine
tons of on the road poetry

Comment is about Edinburgh Choo-Choo (blog)

Pete Crompton

Tue 18th Nov 2008 23:39

wow Anton, close escape, you would have got out im sure, the many construction workers and helicopter pilots got blitzed. Theres som harrowing footage of a rescue chopper that snags its rotor blades on a power cable and crashes

Comment is about Studies in Pripyet (blog)

<Deleted User> (5646)

Tue 18th Nov 2008 13:46

My sentiments exactly, only i don't have a cock.
love Janet.x

Comment is about John Darwin (poet profile)

Original item by John Darwin

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shoeless

Tue 18th Nov 2008 08:35

Words. They are the hardest because they fall

Like seeds on barren soil;

that lays it bare doesnt it ?
i wonder did you take the last step

Comment is about The end is nigh, I hope (blog)

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clarissa mckone

Tue 18th Nov 2008 02:03

LOL Mia, Very funny, I bet thats her picture.

Comment is about Bliss (blog)

Original item by Mia Darlone

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Andy N

Mon 17th Nov 2008 23:44

one of my favs off your sonts, tone.. i know what is going on here (behind the scenes), but it still doesn't dim it's power! good stuff!

Comment is about The end is nigh, I hope (blog)

<Deleted User> (5247)

Mon 17th Nov 2008 18:40

I wonder how you would cope without one, I wont always be here lol mum xxxx

Comment is about White Goods (article)

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Dave Morgan

Mon 17th Nov 2008 17:52

Nice one Pete, up there with the best. did you know Obama was an anagram of Amabo which if my grade 9 Latin O level serves me well means "I will love"! I stand to be corrected on this. I didn't get grade 9 for nothing. Sorry, that's exactly what I got grade 9 for.

Comment is about the animal instinct (blog)

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Dave Morgan

Mon 17th Nov 2008 17:33

Antonionio

cracking rhyming scheme.

Dave

Comment is about The end is nigh, I hope (blog)

<Deleted User> (5164)

Mon 17th Nov 2008 15:38

wow that was great
you do have a fantastic way with words

even though you have not wrote what happends next..
you kinda know

if you know what i mean lol

sez x

Comment is about The end is nigh, I hope (blog)

<Deleted User> (5591)

Mon 17th Nov 2008 11:49

Thanks all for your interest in this feature. I would be delighted to receive your articles; you can send them to dermot@writeoutloud.net.

That includes you Sarah, of course you're good enough.

And, Freda, articles from women will be given equal consideration to those that I receive from ladies, girls and sheilas which in turn will be equal to any from chaps, gents, dudes, geezers and lads.
Note: any female writers wishing to describe their gender using offensive and misogynistic gangsta rap derived monikers will be instead be referred to by one of the above terms for the purposes of this feature.

Comment is about New feature - What I Do That's New (article)

Original item by Dermot Glennon

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Julian (Admin)

Mon 17th Nov 2008 11:14

Dave, love that 'we pen them in'; recognise your frustration at that duality, the dilemma of trying to capture the essence of something real, but rendering it into artifice through our intervention.

Comment is about The Writing Class (blog)

Original item by Dave Morgan

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Val Cook

Mon 17th Nov 2008 10:27

I love your poem,your words bring to life what is creative writing. Some do and some don`t get the bug.

Comment is about The Writing Class (blog)

Original item by Dave Morgan

darren thomas

Mon 17th Nov 2008 00:43

Isle of View.

Comment is about In Search of Words (blog)

Pete Crompton

Sun 16th Nov 2008 13:23

Hi Atoni, yes I know the feeling here, did you wake up not knowing what time it was where you were? I think you could develop this theme into a set of poems on the road, travel always lends itself to writing dont you think?

With this poem I feel you are starting to get going and It leaves me wanting to know more!

Those hotel rooms, are they bland, the journey...

'ahead of the pack up some hilldside' my fave line and one that begins to set the imagination running itself

Looking forward to some road trip stuff! :-)

Pete

Comment is about In bed at twilight (blog)

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Andy N

Sun 16th Nov 2008 10:55

I take it - you had matchsticks in your eyes after that then - lol

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<Deleted User> (5164)

Sun 16th Nov 2008 10:50

thanx for the comment hun
this ''boundery'' im on about -
is quite...how can i say....
- a shit hole lol


i know ive said it before
but perfect place is a really sweet poem
you seem a lovely gentleman

sez x

Comment is about Andy N (poet profile)

Original item by Andy N

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Andy N

Sun 16th Nov 2008 10:48

Phew! Impressive m8! Left me out off breathe reading it, but I like it!

Comment is about the animal instinct (blog)

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shoeless

Sun 16th Nov 2008 10:46

you have a lovely son in pete june , well done that girl .

Comment is about self scan (blog)

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Andy N

Sun 16th Nov 2008 10:45

I used to work in a mirror making factory, so i would be knackered writing a poem like this, but I like the beat behind this - reminds me off some of my stuff, and I like the twist at the end in particular

Comment is about Mirror on the wall (blog)

<Deleted User> (5164)

Sun 16th Nov 2008 10:44

hey this sounds great
i dont think im good enouth though,

but im willing to lose my modisty a little :)

sez x

Comment is about New feature - What I Do That's New (article)

Original item by Dermot Glennon

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Andy N

Sun 16th Nov 2008 10:44

Speaking as a former zen buddisht, m8 - this scans pretty good to me!

Comment is about Advice on dying (blog)

<Deleted User> (5247)

Sun 16th Nov 2008 08:10

Phew! mum breaths sighs of relief, not ture! lol mum xxxxxxx

Comment is about self scan (blog)

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clarissa mckone

Sun 16th Nov 2008 06:23

This may be your best war type poem yet!

Comment is about the animal instinct (blog)

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shoeless

Sun 16th Nov 2008 00:22

thankyou kindly for taking the time to think and then comment on my poem ,

Comment is about Moira Eribenne (poet profile)

Original item by Moira Eribenne

<Deleted User> (5549)

Sat 15th Nov 2008 18:14

Deep down would be fantastic set to music.

Comment is about Darren Whitehead (poet profile)

Original item by Darren Whitehead

<Deleted User> (5549)

Sat 15th Nov 2008 18:12

Hiya Darren, enjoyed your poems, do we know each other? you look very familiar ?

Comment is about Darren Whitehead (poet profile)

Original item by Darren Whitehead

<Deleted User> (4281)

Sat 15th Nov 2008 18:03

Hello, Richard

You are being missed, where are you?
The poem is great! It shows you are looking for new things to find change either in life or in anything. "I am sick of repetition" tells all...Thought provoking write. Come back dear poet, you are missed!


Kind Regards,
Zuzanna

Comment is about Repetition (blog)

Original item by Richard Brooks

<Deleted User> (4281)

Sat 15th Nov 2008 17:56

Good Day, Rodney

Sorry for leaving my comment blank!
I was distracted by a phone call and had to leave the computer. Thank you so much for taking the time to place a constructive comment on my write. As I have mentioned before, still learning the craft of creative writing so if you have enough patience to read my writes and see what can be changed then you are most welcome. I do not take any offenses if comes to improvement. THANK YOU!

Warm Regards,
Zuzanna

Comment is about Rodney Wood (poet profile)

Original item by Rodney Wood

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Belinda Johnston

Sat 15th Nov 2008 14:17

Hi Daniel

I really like the words that you've used in this poem, like concede and cementing. They seem to portray exactly what you are feeling.

I think that to a degree we have all been conditioned over the years and it takes courage to be your true self, and not someone who you think others will like, but to simply be.

I really liked this poem

Well done, Belinda

Comment is about conquer yourself rather than the world (blog)

Original item by Daniel Hooks

Pete Crompton

Sat 15th Nov 2008 12:26

I like the implication of the blanched food / meals on wheels for the elderly.

Also the way that blood falls, Like when the pump stops running on a fountain, the heart.
It all falls.
the metaphor reminds me of an Achilles heel, Jason and the Argonauts when he drains the blood

I think the penultimate stanza could be omitted for a real killer poem.

Nice one John

Comment is about Taste of Human (blog)

Original item by John G.Hall

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Gus Jonsson

Sat 15th Nov 2008 11:09

Hi Mirna

Superb inner observation...

warning! 7 years bad luck if you let it fall....something to reflect on
well done!
Gus Jonsson

Comment is about Mirror on the wall (blog)

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Julian (Admin)

Fri 14th Nov 2008 21:01

good to see you back last night Shaun. Excellent work.

Comment is about Shaun Fallows (poet profile)

Original item by Shaun Fallows

<Deleted User> (4281)

Fri 14th Nov 2008 20:17

Hello, Rodney

Your poem is perfect!
I mean it has all the beautiful melodic rhyme and it is a personal sort of write. You were trying to show a sense of humour not wearing facial hair. Well, you are looking great to me - The poem is excellent!!

I am planning to take courses in creative writing so my skills shall improve. At present I thank you for leaving a very constructive comment on my poem "Amazon Forest."
I do appreciate your good points.

Thank you,
Zuzanna

Comment is about AT 18 ALL I WANTED WAS A TACHE OR BEARD (blog)

Original item by Rodney Wood

<Deleted User> (5984)

Fri 14th Nov 2008 19:34

I love this poem Steve. It's very sophisticted language and used a difficult rhyme (very successfully). I love sickening as a sort of answer to your effective rhetorical question.

loved it

And thank you for your constructive comments. I really appreciate them and have to say that I agree about the cliche and will amend accordingly.

Big hug

Mel
x

Comment is about Career Politicians and Bankers are evil (insert expletive/s) (blog)

Original item by Steve O'Connor

<Deleted User> (4281)

Fri 14th Nov 2008 16:42

Comment is about Rodney Wood (poet profile)

Original item by Rodney Wood

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Rodney Wood

Fri 14th Nov 2008 13:06

It's like wandering around lost in the mist. I've no idea about these generalities you mention - spirit, hurtingand winds of change. Raymond Carver said "the best art has its reference points in real life"

Comment is about Feel (blog)

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Rodney Wood

Fri 14th Nov 2008 13:02

Like the poem and the photo!

Comment is about Advice on dying (blog)

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Rodney Wood

Fri 14th Nov 2008 12:58

Thanks for sharing this. In my first slam I was knocked out three times. You juyst have to learn and keep on.
Rodney

Comment is about London Performances (blog)

Original item by Alain English

<Deleted User> (4281)

Thu 13th Nov 2008 21:16

Hello dear Shirley

Sorry that you are GONE. You are certainly missed. Hope all is well. My email is:musial_82@hotmail.com

Feel free to keep in touch....Missing your work...Zuzanna

Comment is about (blog)

<Deleted User> (4281)

Thu 13th Nov 2008 21:05

Hi, Antonio !

This is thought provoking poem. Yes it is! You have given so many options to one soul. How to die? I am sure no one can really tell how the end will come to any of us. It is quite unknown. Love the picture of the Eiffel. My sister live there not to far from that place. Loved the visit in Paris and will be flying there some day again.
Thank you for sharing your lovely writing.

Also THANK YOU for the comment on my last vivid poem, the Amazon Rainforest.'
Appreciate your time to read and commenting.

Thank you,
Zuzanna

Comment is about Advice on dying (blog)

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Gus Jonsson

Thu 13th Nov 2008 16:19

Thats how I lost my hair Val!
Regards
Gus

Comment is about Valerie Cook (poet profile)

Original item by Valerie Cook

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shoeless

Thu 13th Nov 2008 06:15

hi antonionioni (is that enough oni )

I have read this a good few times since you posted it. the poem and the following comment by carol ( hi carol )which shows up the startling differences in folks' hopes and beliefs , i was reassured and uplifted by

'dreaming of life preserved in grains of sand'

Comment is about Advice on dying (blog)

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