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it's not always prudent
to speak one's mind
ignore the old adage
"cruel to be kind"

some words are better
when they're left unsaid
some thoughts are safer
harbored inside one's head

we want to believe
that we know what's best
that life's taught us well
that we're up to the test

yet time and time again
we fall
a reminder
that we know
at all

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as i lay me down, awake

i beg the depths of sleep too take

my mind away from all this stress

and warm my heart with tenderness

i listen to this jagged breathing

not asleep, it sounds like seething

and though it twists and tears my heart

pray bridge this gap, words and worlds apart

it's astounding the space that exists in one bed

once the seeds of doubt take root in one's...

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we argue about the give and take

it's upsetting that i can't stay awake

and afterwards when you're not here

i can't get back to sleep my dear

i think about the things i could have done


and the words i should have said

now that you're not here to hear them

they're doing cartwheels in my head

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All I want to do is hold you close and show you.

Because with all of this space between us...

Sometimes words are not enough.

Sometimes words are too much.

Sometimes when it all feels too rough.

Sometimes the only thing that will suffice is touch. 

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this house

this house is just a comfortable box

to hold my clothes, my shoes, my socks

it keeps me warm and safe at night

my shady cave when the world's too bright

yes, it's a place i can be off-guard

to hide my pain when life gets hard

it's a place i'm allowed to scream and shout

but i don't want to be safe now

                                               i want to go out

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screaming is never the key

to lift her veiled eyelashes

whisper and the curtains part

revealing truth

                        in flashes

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and i begin to fade

   the world

               when I'm alone

   loses it's color

                 without you


                                     and i begin to fade

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& love & need & love & need...

I need a drink of water. I love you.

I love a drink of water. I need you.

I need a drink of you. I love water.

I love a drink of you. I need water.

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Tried, I did.

I wish I may I wish I might 
write a new poem for you every night. 
And although I try so very hard
I can't seem to live up to the life of a bard.

I quiet my brain and I open my heart
and every night I come up with a start.

Next I begin to rhyme and riddle
I twist my words to create the middle.

But often I get stifled then.
Hung up in the struggle to form the end.

So my  unfinish...

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I said to him one afternoon...

"I love you like the sunlight loves a shadow,

always trying to catch and consume it

but also enjoying the contrast too much

to ever take it over completely."


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story time

 when you talk
 about us
 i am
 like an eager child
 jumping up and down
 excitedly urging the story teller on
 anticipating the part where i am the star
 "tell me the part about me!"

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It was the moment when you became my everything

It was long before I was willing to admit it

It was long before I even started to deny it

It was long before I could no longer ignore it

It was long before I was able to accept it

It was long before I began to embrace it

It was that first accidental conversation

It was nothing more than a passing comment

It was as important as...

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I feel poetry and delirium whenever I am without you

It's all white noise closing in and I don't know what to do

Nothing makes sense. My vision blurs and my body feels hollow

I close my eyes. I push off into the winding tube of darkness below

I start to slip and It feels like I'm flailing on a loop-de-loop slide

I hope you are there to catch me when I fly out the other side


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i'm jealous of the wind that caresses your skin

each breath of air that you breathe in

i'm jealous of the birds that catch your eye

their flight so elegant across the sky

i'm jealous of the song that sticks in your head

and the cotton sheets that cover your bed



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upon waking (for the first time)

i was alone but not wanting

i was content in my solitude

i was enveloped by the quiet

i was cocooned in beauty and softness

i was safely cradled in silky comfort

i felt a stirring in the air, causing the gossamer to ripple around me delicately

i did not bristle

i felt at ease

i did not retreat

i felt myself expand

i lifted my head above the mists of my keep

i stret...

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lesson not learned

here I come

moving faster than I ever imagined possible

careening toward what

I never know

you can't tell me

but here we go

I try to look out the window

everything flies by in a blur

I remember last time

veering suddenly

off the road. over the cliff. out of my mind

when the dust settled I climbed the muddy bank and looked down at the wreckage, smoldering below


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scintillating conversation

should we talk about the weather?

is there nothing more to say?

we said things would soon get better.

now it's all drifting away.

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Winter Came

Picking flowers in your garden
lamenting which to choose
I feel the mist dampen my cheeks
as the sky begins to bruise
"So winter finds me at last", I say
"On this bright and sunny morn."
All at once the clouds roll in
and in my haste I miss the thorn
Eyes forward, there it is in the distance
Trying to run but I meet resistance
The terror comes fast, through my veins it flows
A poisonous...

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This is a cautionary tale. Pay attention, please. Take heed.


she believes if she gives him what he wants

he will give her what she needs

she drapes herself in misery

fields sown with barren seeds

each morning when the sun comes up

she catalogues his deeds

dry promises that raped her soil

he digs until she bleeds

he finally crumples to the ground

there shall be no more thneeds


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I rung to ask if you are okay

but really

I wanted you to know that I am not

you tell me you are doing fine, then say you trust I am

but really

you want me to lie to you, to say all is forgiven

yes, I can read between your lines

but really

I pretend I believe you, and I say goodbye

I sit still, holding the phone and wondering

what went wrong

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time zones

and it's the middle of the night where you are

but I'm here

wide awake

belly full

wondering what you are dreaming about

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I'm a cliché (mused)

Mused/inspired by 'If only for a Moment' by Devon Brock


I'm a cliché, a subtle curve in the great cycle of life.
I hold the same importance in the grand scheme of things
as a drop of water or a grain of sand,
somehow autonomous
yet an integral part of an ocean,
or a monolithic mountain boulder,
a particle of mist in a hurricane
What next?
Perhaps we take the form of a hybrid,
a sa...

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cycle of lifecyclicalhumanityinspiredmortalitymusedmusesmusing

so many ifs (mused)

Inspired by 'Love for you' by Jon Stainsby


love inspires so many ifs
all of them are felt in different ways
each one felt and intended completely

each one flows like this milk
covering my morning cereal
(it will surely be too soggy to eat before I lift my spoon)

if I controlled the stars
I'd make them shine for you

if I kept time instead of losing it
my tea would not get col...

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I seem to wear my heart upon or hidden up my sleeve,

always trying out new tricks but failing to deceive.

As the song says, "I'd rather be hard to love than easy to leave."



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A perfect match - strike anywhere.

A perfect love - what happened there?

I walked away without a care,

but turned and tripped on your last stare.

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heartacheHeartbreakloverelationship breakup

what's left


when even sleep is not an option

you are what is left

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I wonder

and I wonder if there's someone else that you wish was giving you the attention that I am

and I wonder if you are giving someone else the attention that I wish you would give me

and I wonder why this imbalance follows me

chases me

always always nipping at my heels

and yet somehow manages to also remain

two steps ahead of me

this imbalance of desire

of devotion

of depende...

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addicts lie

"boop boop beep beep boop bup bip beep" go the alerts and synaptic responses

too fast to process, too repetitive to want to

"spit that out, it's toxic" I warned

as he slurped up drama in great mouthfulls, as if she were kool-aid

he would slice open a vein and welcome drama directly if she asked him to

surreptitious texting continues beneath the table

eyes downcast, thumbs flying ...

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i am as a sapling in the shadow of a hundred year oak
try not to breathe, not to stir
i wish to remain unnoticed at the edge of your meadow
here in my solitude
i dare not disturb this perfect silence
inexplicable and deeper than night
nothing casting it
a black shadow wavers in the bright sunlight
it covers the the meadow floor
pulling at my curiosity I am lost in it's mystery

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maybe mayhem

*Original date true, minor format edit in '²²


maybe you're amazed by mayhem.  sweet mayhem.

chaos colored lipstick screams, tumultuous as she licks her lips

a wild and tangled disarray, her hair - a disheveled decadent disorder

cascading down past swaying hips

rolling, undulating as she slips

her thoughts into your consciousness

ideas driven by desire i...

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