If only for a Moment

Mist upon the red ash of dawn,

and beneath the mist, water,

and beneath the water, silt

and silent rounding stone.

I, swallowed white on the overpass,

become water, if only for a moment grown

beneath the one true nature, blind

to the soft descent, bound to tortured rapid,

unknowing my end in the sea.

◄ i'm truly sorry for this...

Rendering Dream Upon Waking #2 ►

Comments

Profile image

Eiren Water

Thu 27th Jun 2019 03:06

This took me on a cyclical journey and brought to my mind the (Disneyfied cliché, but) very real circle/cycle of life.
It inspired me. My fellow poets seem to have become my muses.

The awareness of being just a drop of water or a grain of sand, or a fleck of dust traveling on the wind.

Profile image

Devon Brock

Tue 25th Jun 2019 22:50

Thank you, Mr. Humble. I am gonna pun humbly that I am humbled by your your comment.

Profile image

Jonathan Humble

Tue 25th Jun 2019 22:14

Liked this a lot, Devon. Beneath the words we follow different meanings. I enjoyed finding mine. Thank you.

Profile image

Devon Brock

Tue 25th Jun 2019 21:41

Thank you fellow poets. Funny thing is, I intended to write a pastoral and this is what I ended up with. lol. Dorothy, this was not intended to be sad, but I do appreciate your take on it. But maybe, there is a certain sadness in the loss of self awareness in the endless "water". But I think there is also a solace. Strange things happen to the mind when immersed in mists. Laura, I lived my early years near the sea, but now live about as far as one could get from it in NA. So, there is a longing for a childhood place that I haven't been able to shake.

There is a submission to my own death intended in the poem, Sophie, thanks for picking up on that. Martin and Ray - oneness, dissolution - yes thank you so much. David, I believe it was Baudelaire that observed that staring into the sea is enough to give a person a sense of eternity.

Thanks again everybody. This is lovely community I am happy to be a part of.

Profile image

Martin Elder

Tue 25th Jun 2019 19:14

This speaks to me of an almost sensual experience, at being one with the natural word.
Nice one

Profile image

Laura Taylor

Tue 25th Jun 2019 16:13

Mmmm, this is interesting, and sonically beautiful. Is this a favourite part of the world for you? I love how the layers descend and take us back to where we came from.

Profile image

Sophie Morley

Tue 25th Jun 2019 14:57

Speaks to me of submission x

Profile image

raypool

Tue 25th Jun 2019 14:35

A sense of dissolution makes this a sensory and almost comforting experience. A rounded and lovely poem Devon

,Ray

Profile image

Wolfgar Miere

Tue 25th Jun 2019 11:29

Devon,

I often regard the Ocean as an end of things, I suppose it is because it is at the edge of where we live and beyond is unknown.

This reminded me of my own thoughts, I did sort of sink into it. Which was probably the desired effect.

David.

Profile image

Do.RoThY

Tue 25th Jun 2019 11:21

Bitterly sad......the end will be heaven.....👍

If you wish to post a comment you must login.

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

Find out more Hide this message