I would agree that this is a marvellous poem - so rich in thought.
Is prevention better than cure? Can some extremes ever be cured? Is a good man bad for contemplating a violent act that would so benefit humanity. Had he pulled the trigger, he would have been considered a madman, a badman. How many people would we all pull the trigger on now? Does one man have the right to set himself up as God and make that decision?
I didn't mind the reference to Auschwitz - I didn't find it glib at all. It pretty much crystalised the choice to be made.
I loved your concluding line also - I think we'd all agree with it.
Very clever - very gripping. It didn't hook me in, in the first verse though - I think that's why you haven't had enough comments on this wonderful piece. x

Comment is about The Banality of Evil (blog)

lot of stuff to like here, kealan even though i don't get the meaning (Probably too early).

Particularly like the 1st stanza..

Comment is about Thinking In Image. (blog)

Original item by Kealan Coady

Thanks for commenting on my poem 'Margaret'. The names are real,I thought about changing them but thought they were anonymous enough.

Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)

Original item by Isobel

Hi Melissa, loved your travelling lines in this one... the road unbroken is a very powerful image. Win x

Comment is about Drifting Upon Waves (blog)

Hi Gareth, Welcome to Write out Loud. Winston.

Comment is about Gareth Writer-Davies (poet profile)

Original item by Gareth Writer-Davies

Thanks for the comments.This really isn't the kind of poem that wins poetry competitions, Greg, for all kind of reasons.
OK, so "He lies on the couch, it's now or it's Auschwitz" is brutal, flip, glib.I dunno myself. Would it strike you that way without the rhyme? I see it in the best tradition of Monty Python, Mel Brooks.I was taken with the notion that if good men have bad dreams can good ensue from evil deeds? And all that jazz. I was saying that prevention is better than cure in the medical, even political sense, I guess. I'm not really a flippant person, honest. I'll have terrible dreams tonight.

Comment is about The Banality of Evil (blog)

ta Dali for reading 'haha/sob'means lots.SW.

Comment is about Dali (poet profile)

Original item by Dali

This is a very interesting poem and one I was immediately drawn too. I must admit though I am rather myself shattered by the Glib reference to Auschwitz in what many readers would interpret as a bit of tongue in cheek. Because of that reference it makes you study the poem again and when you do, you begin to have negative feelings about the writers intentions??? On further reading too, yes you could always argue prevention is better than cure, but in what context I wonder? It rather misleads the reader into some kind of acceptance that it is in some circumstances okay to perhaps, maybe, kill someone who may show all the indications of nurturing the same macabre act. In this glib form, it then becomes something sinister. And then, you have to argue the point of a theme that may transpire from this kind of thinking, or dare i say, conditioning. And that is The Minority Report. In reality, one could not rely on oracle alone, one would have to use a Time Machine for prevention of unnecessary killings and genocide, but then there is another whole topic to discuss from that. For example, if a life is taken, and you go back in time to prevent that life being taken, wouldn't there be a particular phenomena whereby the person saved experiences all the pain of death, without actually dieing once that period in time was caught up again? And what of the Theories of Azazel, Satan, The Nephilim, would they not want to take the life that had already been took before that life was saved??? This poses so many questions. But then, the bending of time has through the ages always been something man has argued about till at least some of them, have lost their minds. Further, what of the Niburu, dopplegangers and such. There is a whole realm out there. Bit sad you mentioned Auschwitz there. But good discussion topic here, we could see where the latest thinking is on this.

regards, mike.

Comment is about The Banality of Evil (blog)

Nice Andy... similar to the curtains (your last blog) liked also. Win x

Comment is about Perfect Place (blog)

Original item by Andy N

Hi Andy,
Thank you for your lovely comments on 'All that you want...'
The last line was included for the effect that I wanted to give it ; )

Comment is about Andy N (poet profile)

Original item by Andy N

Hi Dali, I have not come across your work before, and I have just read them all. If you look at my work, it is like running over many years different obstacles, but always the terrain is difficult. In my work, you are on an orienteering course, you come across stoney ground, rocks, fallen trees, puddles, violent rivers, felled forests you have to stride through without breaking your ankles. A lot of this, comes from an ignorant, brutal upbringing, where often issues were thrown at me i did not want to negotiate with, further, military service and the attitude that goes along with soldiering, seems to have imbued itself in my work. It is harsh, and often you run into trees and obstacles that make the journey difficult and tiresome, so tiresome. I say all that, because after reading your work, it is as if (though you have had your difficulties), you have sat by a brook for some years. Meditated, refined your thoughts coherently, and are able through lucid intellect and wisdom; to convey in each verse, understanding, but above all, a kind of peace that i do not see in other poets work on this site, let alone my own work. Some would argue that it lacks punch, but I differ, I think many a man or woman could learn a great deal, about different ways of interpreting the world, by talking to you. Maybe I have it wrong, but that is how your work projects itself to me. It's refine, like oil that has been slowly, and meticulously prepared, for a great machine (in this case, your mind, or heart). I really am quite deeply touched by your work, and in itself, is most definitely needed on this site. I really would like to see more. Biggupz mate, really very mature works. Pleasure reading.

noetic-fret!

Comment is about Dali (poet profile)

Original item by Dali

This is one of those poems that requires one's attention with every new line, makes you hungry for what's next. And yet it's very personal

Comment is about Beyond the Garden #4 (blog)

Original item by Dave Bradley

My kindest regards to Miss Maisy for her nose wrinkling appreciation of my work.

Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)

Original item by Winston Plowes

I just read it again to my daughter (aged 10) screwed her nose up and said it was really odd. I would take that as a compliment! The screwing up of the nose is reserved for only the most bizare in my opinion. lol . Win (+ Maisy)

Comment is about A MACKEREL IN THE BATH. (blog)

thanks for all of your feedback, i really appreciate it. ray - i meant that it is the exporter of depression as the community mental health team for manchester is based in the centre of harpuhey, i might need to tweak that a wee bit so thanks for flagging it as not quite working. i feel i must say that the metaphorical 'skipping' is rather a hope for the future than a current feeling.

Comment is about Latest Mental Health Poem: In Therapy (blog)

Original item by Gemma Lees

Cynthia (Matapos) thank you for being such a spur - I really do appreciate it

incidentally I have visited this place but years ago and these thoughts are still fresh in my mind - another friend (not WOL)who did not know I wrote poetry seemed astonished when she saw this and that I had not mentioned my interest in the muse x

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Dave thank you again for commenting on my work - please also thank your friend on my behalf for being supportive - it is easy as you infer to miss large swathes of other's work - but I know how supportive most are at WOL

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Greg - (Matapos) it is so kind of you take the time to comment on my work - especially as I put so much stuff on here - it is this sort of encouragement that gives me the confidence to post more blogs - thanks a million - incidentally I have visited this place but years ago and these thoughts are still fresh in my mind - another friend (not WOL)who did not know I wrote poetry was astonished when she saw this and that I had not mentioned my interest in the muse

Comment is about Greg Freeman (poet profile)

Original item by Greg Freeman

i did'nt see that one but thanks very much cynth your words are really encouraging.

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Hi David. Thanks for your comment on 'Mackerel In The Bath', which in turn has led me to your work. 'On My Daughter's Conversion To Islam', especially, is a wonderful piece of writing.

Comment is about David Cooke (poet profile)

Original item by David Cooke

Hi Winston. Thank you for your comment on 'Mackerel In The Bath'-in which you summed the piece up perfectly!

Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)

Original item by Winston Plowes

Tis a powerful poem, alright. Cold paranoia for dinner - I've had that.One thing I didn't get was Manchester's biggest exporter. Of what?

Comment is about Latest Mental Health Poem: In Therapy (blog)

Original item by Gemma Lees

Perhaps also a bit of word play with the 'sleepiness' theme.

Comment is about Greg Freeman (poet profile)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Love it. Very 'Oscar-y'

Comment is about All The Days Scream (blog)

Original item by David Mac

This is a marvellous poem, Ray, intelligent and funny and of course well-crafted, and constructed. You must enter this in competitions. Reading the second stanza almost make me start whistling Colonel Bogey. One tiny quibble, and it's probably just me: I found the words "it's now or it's Auschwitz" a bit too brutal, or flip, somehow. But I am a very sensitive soul. My wife is always saying so.

Comment is about The Banality of Evil (blog)

I really liked it all. Kealan, my jaw drops these days as I read your work. And so much! There will be revisions (maybe) later, but the strength is already inherent. Your mastery of vocabulary is outstanding. Sometimes it takes will power to reign in such a stock of words available to use. Do you ever sleep? I bet you saw the Birmingham performance of 'Othello' on telly. The last lines seem to be an echo of that emotional final scene. Or not. That you 'fucking love poetry' illuminates what you write.

Comment is about The It Of It. (blog)

Original item by Kealan Coady

I really like that change to the dreamtime, David. Seems to help it flow, and root it, too, if that makes sense! Probably not. But sometimes a small tweak can make a big difference, I've discovered.

Comment is about David Cooke (poet profile)

Original item by David Cooke

This is good, Ann, simple and engaging with your own personal touch of imagination. I remember you mentioned a dead badger a few days ago, after 'the dead pheasant' palaver.

Comment is about lament for a dead badger (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

PS should ave mentioned I've tinkered a bit since. Changed the biblical reference to a more appropriate Aboriginal one - which also shortens an originally heavyish line.

Comment is about Greg Freeman (poet profile)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Hi Ledger Discovered this one via Greg's blog. Glad I did! Great variation on 'coals in the bath'and the reference to Imperial Leathergives gives a subtle hint of gentrification!

Comment is about A MACKEREL IN THE BATH. (blog)

Hi Greg I nearly mailed you that I'd done another Oz poem. Glad you spotted it. You're right where the koalas are concerned. They're actually quite hard to see even if they're pointed out to you. We did a mini safari with this hippy looking bloke called Mark. He was really interesting and made us look at the landscape in a completely different way. The Australians pay lip service to preserving the koalas, but just get on with their lives. There are really quite small numbers of koalas left now. Lots get killed by domestic animals, and God knows how many were killed in the recent disasters. Unfortunately, for the little fellas they favour the S.E. coastal regions same as the majority of the people.

Comment is about Greg Freeman (poet profile)

Original item by Greg Freeman

thanks for the link anna
Win

Comment is about Anna McCrory (poet profile)

Original item by Anna McCrory

thanks for your comments on to the queen of carrot flowers. I can see the lyrical / musical possibilities but am musically inept! lol. maybe you could fashion something! Win :-)

Comment is about Andy N (poet profile)

Original item by Andy N

I've spent time in North Wales recently and saw quite a few dead badgers by the road. I suppose it means there's a healthy population if an unusually high number are being killed. But that doesn't take away from the poignancy of the fate of just one, which your poem captures well.

Comment is about lament for a dead badger (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Thanks Winston, I intend to ;) x

Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)

Original item by Winston Plowes

i didn't realise it was two poems actually, Gus but top one. your language is defo getting more and more subtle for which you have my respect...

i'll comment over 'perfect place' later (forgot to comment back yesterday to you) x

Comment is about Flowers in the Rain (blog)

Original item by Gus Jonsson

lot of excellent stuff in this Gem... I would have loved to heard a audio off this as it'll be interesting to see how you read this aloud too but it's top banana still.... Andy x

Comment is about Latest Mental Health Poem: In Therapy (blog)

Original item by Gemma Lees

interesting point raised by steve there which i agree with there.. i agree the first stanza was probably the stronger for me also in particular the last two lines of it.

the problem i perhaps have with the second stanza is i am wondering whether it should be cut back somewhat or split into two as it seems too long for me (Would cripple me reading that out).

interesting read however... A

Comment is about The It Of It. (blog)

Original item by Kealan Coady

I found this a very powerful write, one which I will come back to..

Comment is about Beneath The Ancients Glare (blog)

Original item by Noetic-fret!

Imperial Leather??..dead posh you are..thoroughly enjoyed your fishy tale!

Comment is about A MACKEREL IN THE BATH. (blog)

Wanted to fill in some more bits inbetween yours. But with what? and thats the beauty of it :-) Win

Comment is about All The Days Scream (blog)

Original item by David Mac

delightfully down to earth nonesense. Win

Comment is about A MACKEREL IN THE BATH. (blog)

...and an Old Crow!

Comment is about a nonpareil (blog)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Thanks for your feedback on Mackerel In The Bath-and also for the tip on Xmas dinner in Hungary. You never know when such information may come in handy.

Comment is about John Coopey (poet profile)

Original item by John Coopey

Thank you for your comment on Mackerel In The Bath, I am pleased that you enjoyed it :-)

Comment is about Valerie Cook (poet profile)

Original item by Valerie Cook

I confess! I confess! I will sign anything you want me to sign!

Comment is about Tiles (blog)

Original item by John Coopey

Mr Black i agree with thee

Comment is about The It Of It. (blog)

Original item by Kealan Coady

Hi Cynthia - thanks for the comment on 'Perfect Place'. It's one of my favourites - if you are at Poetica on Wednesday coming when I am chairing - I'll tell you a funny story about it which I won't repeat on here... thanks again - x

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

na thats pretty much it. The longing for change and the helplessness of akcnowledging it's failing to happen.

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Love it. Identify with so many things.

Feeling like its ok to be me, no matter what I've talked about, no matter what life threw at me.

And, "counting the steps

From the door to my car" mmmm yeah controlling the little things...

xXx

Comment is about Latest Mental Health Poem: In Therapy (blog)

Original item by Gemma Lees