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Metaphysical Developmental Progress

Many a time, I've held my head
in disbelief, often until unconscious
- a slow release, from...
my mind numbing growing pains

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paindepressionnaturegodlovespiritualspiritualitypoempoetpoetry

Broken Record's Repetition

For me, 

Please,

Stop cutting.

I said.

A broken record.

 

Only now,

As she lays in the grave,

Six feet under.

I wonder

if things would have changed,

If I just once asked her to

Stop cutting,

Please,

For you. 

 

Would it have made a difference, though?

The reason to cut or not remains 

the same, either way.

Nothing can change that here

the...

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tragedypoempainmentalhealthsuicideself-harm

Wrestled to girl

I wrestled you down

Girl

Into woman

I grew your thoughts for you

Lifeless of the party

Monotone 

You vacuum expression

And drain me,

Exhausted

Stop

I gave you emotions

Give me energy

Any kind just give

Give and give 

I must drink

Always thirsty am I

But I drink for you

So what’s this lull in your throat

Dip in your tone

Crack? 

No

You ...

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Wrestlefightabusemanipulatetoxictriggertraumabondconnectioninterdependentcontrolobsessnarcissistsociopathrelationshipheart breakhealbreak uplearnreflectself awaregrowpainrealisegaslightliarcomplicatedmonologuecharacterpartneremotional abuse

Enough

If only I could go back in time

To rectify all my mistakes.

All that I shouldn’t have said,

Yet still felt the need to say.

Why did I even feel that need?

I, too, was just a child, right?

 

Be the example,

Show them they are wrong.

Show them we are no beasts.

Show them we can be equal.

Act mature,

Be mature.

Show them they are wrong.

So many rules and rest...

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🌷(7)

regretpoetrylifepainchildhood

Anger's Embrace

Anger curls its tendrils around me,

it envelopes me whole,

strokes me tenderly.

It forms an impenetrable wall,

a shield of sorts,

to keeps me safe and sound.

It takes all those blows

and hits for me,

protects me from my foes.

 

Rage filled screams,

cover the sound of falling tears.

Sadness sits beside me,

gently wipes my sea.

Anger extinguishes my fear,

...

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angerfriendpoetrylifepain

A Living Corpse

At age three 

I dreamed.

Of lands full of sweets.

Of an endless coloured street,

stretched as far as I could see.

I dreamed of my toys,

that entertained me with their noise.

I dreamed of everything and more.

I dreamed.

 

At age ten,

I heard.

About wondrous lands that decorated the earth.

Of all the plants and birds,

our Mother gave birth to.

I heard abo...

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🌷(6)

tragedypoempainpastlifepoetrywritingmemory

The Devil's Face (Resembles Me?)

The devil has always been,

A faceless entity

To me.

Until now at least.

 

Now it has become clear.

I can see.

The devil

In front of me.

 

They are no singular person.

Instead a pair.

Familiar sight.

Lungs devoid of air.

 

The devils gaze at me.

Recognizable set eyes.

No surprise.

Why is this reality?

 

First sight of a child.

Encounter...

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tragedypoemRegretmental healthpoetrylifepain

Phantom Hands

Grief casts complex shadows
over the wilting body
You feel the fingers grasping
as sirens rise again
This fatalistic ritual
an energy made negative
and stomach knotted up
by such unhelpful thoughts

Pain rips at your sails
thunderous and wild
is it the body breaking down
a message poorly translated
The shrieking of absence
cuts deep into the gut
those hands twist and grip
the cycle...

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🌷(9)

health anxietyanxietyhealthfamilypain

Bitter Beer

I used to utter your name delicately 

like it was poetry.

Just as how perfume lingers on a person,

The sweet smell of cherry blossoms 

accompanied your name 

whenever it walked out my mouth.

But now all it leaves,

Is a taste so foul.

 

Your love was like alcohol to me,

It left me feeling euphoric at first,

But after the effect had worn out,

All I was left with w...

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loveheartbreakpoetrylifepain

My Last Act

I pick up the shards of glass 

that are scattered on the ground.

I marvel at them in wonderment,

how beautiful it once was.

Still, it'll serve a good cause.

Such a pity, 

won't you applaud?

This is the end of the show,

Don't you hear the crows?

Toss your roses

Or will you wait till my eyes are closed?

Pour the alcohol,

Let the bubbles float to the surface.

Dr...

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poetrylifepainsuicidedeadtragedypoem

Words Hidden Beneath Ink

A delicate touch on my skin.

How long has it been

since someone softly caressed me?

A touch so unknown,

yet Comfort finds their home.

As you trace the ink on my skin,

your eyes rake down my body,

drinking all of me in,

as if you have not drunk a drop of water 

for as long as you’ve been.

Your fingers on me,

feel like the first sunbeams that grace a leaf,

after a...

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🌷(5)

tragedypoempainfarewelllonginglovepoetryismy life

Sweet Sorrow

I will hurt you,

Just as you will hurt me.

Isn't that beautiful?

To hurt

And be hurt.

To love

And be loved.

Isn't loving someone,

Sentencing yourself to pain?

Then, why pray,

Do all still love?

To hurt and be hurt,

Is to love and be loved.

I long for you to hurt me,

So I don't doubt my love for you.

I long for me to hurt you,

So I don't doubt your lo...

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🌷(4)

lovepoetrylifepainpoembeautifulPassionhorror

Empty Chairs

Just a second is all it would take for you to leave this table.

It never gets better, seeing the amount of empty chairs grow.

Still, I remain seated at the table, glued to my chair.

Unable to do anything but watch with pain in my heart, 

as yet another one leaves me alone here.

But what can I do?

Even an iceberg desperately yearns for warmth,

climbing to the sun, knowing it wi...

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LifeRealpainfarewelltragedypoempoetry

Wounds of liberation

Imagine being totally untethered

After feeling chain linked 

I feel split

That part removed 

That half is trying to renew

But it hurts 

To grow scab over wound 

Missing you is mourning you 

Leaving you is still losing you

And I’m just as lost

As I made you 

If it could be 

I would make it be 

Should I be chain linked again 

I would make it good 

Should ...

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🌷(5)

Missmove onpainhurtupsetloveRelationshiphealhealingbreak upfreedomemotionfixgrowliberateimprisontrapindependentidentityadaptsingletwopaircoupleoneuntetheredlossmourngoodbye

Mercy

People often say that God is merciful.

Then why is it that every night, every day, every waking hour of mine, 

I keep reciting the same prayer?

‘Have mercy, my Lord, and put this subject of yours out of their misery’.

If God is so merciful, then why is it that I still find myself breathing?

Exhaling every breath, hoping this one will be my last.

Why is it that I find myself all t...

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🌷(3)

tragedypoempainpoetrydepressionmentalhealthsuicide

I Love Myself (Unfortunately)

I love myself.

Not in the way one would think.

I truly am in love with myself.

For there is no one in this whole wide world 

That could understand me, 

See me, 

Hear me, 

Apart from me. 

Therefore it is only myself that I can love

And it is only myself that can love I,

Whose song differs from the other whales. 

I love myself.

Not out of free will, 

But out of...

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🌷(7)

selflovetragedypoemlonginglonelypainpoetry

Leverage

I’ve peeled off my skin for you 

I’ve let you crunch my bones,

Consume beyond my flesh

Beyond my visceral tissues

Beyond my beating heart

Beyond the fibres of my being

Down to my soul

I’ve let you gobble up my spirit

I’ve let you slurp up my mind

Lick the lasting crumbs

of my emotions

Everything in me

Everything making me, me

All that constructs me

All...

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🌷(9)

loveheartbreakpainrelationshipemotionvulnerabilityvulnerablegivingsacrificejumpconsumefearpowerinterdependentinterlocksmitteninfatuationin lovebegprayhopedread

Me Minus Pain

I don't know what is right or wrong
I don't understand the way of this world
I can only feel the constant pain
Tears flowing from my eyes
Frequent pain became a
Constant Reminder that I'm not meant
To be loved or to love
So many ways for a heart to get broken
So many hurts and unfulfilled expectations
I want to be free of this pain

I want to be able to prick my heart with a needle yet ...

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🌷(1)

LifeRealpainfarewell

Poetry prequels pain

Poetry comes to me
In bits
and pieces
I write it
On a paper
All those
random lines
Which look like
Prequel plots
of
A hurt
not yet felt
I keep losing
this paper
Just like how I
Keep losing the
Thoughts of you
And of
you and me
Confusing
my heart
So I get to
postpone
the hurt--
 

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🌷(1)

suicidepainpastlifelivepoetrywritersblockyou

Home Interior

‘’See you tomorrow’’,

that was what you said.

Back then, I could not identify it as a lie.

I only realized when I got to your house the next day,

your hanging frame decorating the place.

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🌷(7)

tragedypoemregretpainsuicidedeathpoetry

Smitten (A Sonnet)

He was smitten with love for her;
by that arrow deep and sure.
A gooey warmth between them;
filling the heart all within.

But, love's shaft festered, stinking foul;
to gangrenous, aching howl.
Through steamy glass his love moaned;
as he stood outside alone.

Those barbs cannot be reversed;
holding fast in a soul feeling cursed.
Longing for the lost one gone,
to the breast of a differ...

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SonnetLoveHateLove LostPainValentine's Day

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