On and on 

The voices in my head are getting louder

The fight for happiness is real 

Real hard is getting over your self 

Reall hard to love the one's am supposed to love

I get told I look like a swan on a lake

In reality am more like a brick on the Ocean 

Am no hidden treasure 

Just a confused lad who struggle to grow up 

I think I identify as a soilder because am alway...

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I once was so high I thought about what was in the sky 

What was so funny about that 3 year experience was I didn't think about flying till I come down 

My  problem was unmeasurable pain mix with just the right about if delusion 

I was just right for picking and I was sold on addiction. My choice where never good

To be fair this when you could buy pills over the counter 

Oh god I st...

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An not use to hot dinners or even tea on the morning table 

An so use to rejected that accepted all the love you give can be hard 

I was use to the dull grey fellingdays u had before you decide to brighten up my day for this I am grateful 

And I know there's loads of blokes just like me 

But your one in million 

A diamond that sparks bright then the morning sun 

You woke my soul ...

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I wish I could be fit and health 

I wish I could tell a story 

I wish I could stop smoking 20 

I wish my head didn't feel so heavy 

I wish my heart wasntbso empty 

I wish I alot things never come to be 

Sometimes I even wish not to be 

But most of all I wish I could accept live 

To be able to hold you in mu embrace 

Without the fear of terror 

Or the merniones of past...

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I was heart broken and headmelted 

So I jump on a train 

I just needed to get away 

I needed a bit of space 

I had been rushing abit 

I Owed money all over the place

That's when I bump into an old man 

He ask son why you look so down 

So with a anger head I explain that state I was in 

He reply with 

You see son it's all be done before

See the grass and the tress t...

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If I fall from grace 

If I lose my place

If I the gained of nine to five takes me out 

Wil you remember my smile

Will you remember how much I tryed

Will you remember the time we got so drunk we almost died 

Will you hold on to me 

Or suddenly let me go 

Will I fade in your morany

Or we I live forever 

Or if all this doesn't happened 

Will you make me happy for one ...

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It's okay son

Daddy's drunk again

Do what I say not what I do 

Ders more banging and shouting in the house tonight

Ma has having a break down she doesn't know what to do 

More kids lost to the Monday club 

No money for extras

No way of redoing the truma

Oh one more he shuts

But at what cost

It's an on going circle 

It's an on going pain that's clear to see 

Oh i...

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Am tried 

I can't stop the feeling of crying 

As a man this ain't good 

Get up you bum 

Provide for these you love 

The vices getting louder the worrys getting bigger 

Stát with mé Bay things be good oh I wish I could believe that 

My outer shell beams with conviced and believed 

A checky smile a funny joke 

Oh thank god I think they are buying it 

Oh if they only kno...

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Can you see the pain am in 

I haven't been living in the spiritual light 

Know things are getting dark 

My souls fading away I dunno why 

Please Bay don't be blind, will you see the state of me 

Please Bay dont difrt away 

I really do believe it's your love will save my day 

Save my mind 

Help me not to be blind 

And lead lead me out of the shadow I have been living behi...

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God can you give us a break 

I feel I having got a friend in the world 

And the love you sent me is trun on me 

Am confused am loss 

Am drowning without the booze 

This is very different to what ever we did before 

Who thought living without the prison would be so hard 

Am going on like a over grow child 

I see hate in mirror 

I see disappointed everwhere I go 

And re...

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the addict mind is wonderful an weird place 

its as fearfull as erratic 

its jealous and loving 

its where he madnes lives and grows 

for when focus and presant its a previlge to be hold 

but under the influance of the emeny 

he or she may exploded 

and like a explosion there will be troube and there will be rumble 

for a addiction its a breast that fly so high only to catc...

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Am running out of patients

Running out of time 

Theses old feet are tried

My mind cloudy

I think am still in a dream

Is it all a dream 

If so I need to wake up 

Need to get up 

Am running out pages to write this old sorty

Regret is a feeling worth avoiding

I feel battered

For defeat is around the corner

I feel the soil creeped up around my earthly body 

Am ru...

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My Bay the one I love 

Times a ticking by and by 

Time is flying bye 

I get tí make some money 

Got to get our life together 

Got to go to mass 

All this depans in who I listen to 

Am trying to see through to fog 

Trying to see through the politic smoke 

Trying to back it back home to you 

My life in you hands 

My mood depaning in yours 

My dreams are entwine wi...

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My Bay the one I love 

Times a ticking by and by 

Time is flying bye 

I get tí make some money 

Got to get our life together 

Got to go to mass 

All this depans in who I listen to 

Am trying to see through to fog 

Trying to see through the politic smoke 

Trying to back it back home to you 

My life in you hands 

My mood depaning in yours 

My dreams are entwine wi...

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If I come back home 

Tell you all of where my soul has been 

If I can back and told you all the pain have been in

Tell you I left to soon

Left before it really began 

What would you do 

Would you tell me a sorty of how ever thing will be okay 

Would you tell me you been waiting for me 

Would you ask me who I am tell me the boy that left isn't the man that come back 

Woul...

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How life made me this way??

Was I out of order??

I blame God for my disorder

Maybe am just an animal after being temp

Maybe I just see things upside down???

Maybe I see things that right way up 

And its them who are upside down 

I know am not inside out cause everybody trys to get inside of me??

I dunno really why I am the way I am do you?? 

I dunno why I don't fit in ma...

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Ain't life funny I find a poem at the back of a book I wasn't looking for inspiration or a spiritual awake 

The truth scares me anyway 

So I light a smoke and played with my thoughts or where they playing with me I wasn't site

Light other one smoke told meself a joke well I took one two maybe yokes 

Welcome to my life 

I maybe strange maybe mental 

But am a tryer so I guess God l...

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If your holding on please don't let me go 

I have hanging on

I have been ducking and driving

I try to hard at that begin to avoid your love 

But somehow you got in 

Made it passed all my guards 

Broke through all the way 

Filled in the empty gips 

Because before you their was just emptyness 

A lonely boy with an ego that had the sun blocked out 

Given into temptions a...

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Where do you trun when the drink run dry?

Where do you go when the music stops?

When the passion turns to prison?,

Where do you go when the landlord says out?

What thoughts run through your mind when the doctor says times running out?

What rythenm does the heart beat when all this saddest sets in?

Where does your faith go when God's grace has left this place?

Oh where to when ...

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Am sorry I try to cope 

I try to undo all my u wellness

Try to live with my illness 

Try to walk in the right path 

Try to reach my hand out 

I try to grew 

But for one reason or other I just don't measure up 

Is my time slipping away 

Is this life just not meant for me 

Or should I just go for one more 

One more time to climb in the ring with my old friends 

Hey i...

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Lost is a horrible thing 

Am oppent with many shape and sizeany friends to hit you with 

Losts can give loneliness, darkness anger grief and above all hopeless 

It take and takes 

As life goes by it just take a bit more 

Family friends lovers the people who you try help 

The people who tryed to help you 

Yes it grows it creeps with you pretends it's not their 

Leaves you wi...

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Somebody told me something 

I don't care to remember so just kept moving 

They say the dark dog finds a moving tagert hard to catch 

So I thank God for my restless spirit 

I dunno if I be helped of I didn't go through the helpless stage 

But all that was yesterday 

Things having taken a turned 

For a boy who always felt so down things are strated to look up 

So many winter ...

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Somebody told me something 

I don't care to remember so just kept moving 

They say the dark dog finds a moving tagert hard to catch 

So I thank God for my restless spirit 

I dunno if I be helped of I didn't go through the helpless stage 

But all that was yesterday 

Things having taken a turned 

For a boy who always felt so down things are strated to look up 

So many winter ...

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Slow down 

Take a breath and let it all go and take it all 

You doing wonders you made this far 

So boy stay out of that toxic head of yours 

Step into the heart that's pure 

Know that's a walk you want do 

So slow down 

Your that shy anymore 

Don't sabotage 

What you have it's never worth we that 

You know all you need to know 

You learn the rest when you need it ...

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