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thoughts (Remove filter)

nightly thoughts

a chocolate Santa Claus

a piece of motivation

a piece of dedication

a piece of dictation

mission failed

a piece of self hate

a piece of failure

a piece of disappointment

a piece of weakness

cancelled mission

new year, new start

mission restarted


lose weight


goals you have to achieve

goals you can't achieve

goals you must proceed


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thoughtsMidnight thoughtseating disordermental healthnew year

Congress of Mind

Congress of mind
Legislative limb of this body of reason
Billions of cells cry out to be heard
Elected by instinct, opinions thus interred
Reach past the dirt that covers
Break out of silence's somnolent sequester
come back
come home
Eyes no longer lost in wandering lament
nor sight sight veiled by cataracts of mal intent
Turn back your gaze to whats outside
The sun's caress sure to abi...

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waiting for the first snowflakes

waiting for the first snowflakes



red, yellow, and orange

have long since gone


grass has turned brown


frost has covered the land


afternoon sun is low

in the southern sky


geese have flown

in the blue heavens

south for winter food


squirrels gathered

nuts and stored

them in their nest high in the trees


next-door nei...

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Lost Eternity

Fate comes, though we see it not
Time treads onward, however we dig in our heels
Vigilance toward one threat leads to negligence of another,
and the cruel limits of mortality aren't shy in their reminder
It is this ceaseless grasping at what can only slip through our fingers,
this continued effort at being or creating something which stands outside time that withers our hearts so.
Desire and...

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A seed nurtured, spreading roots in this tainted ground
the only hope for my salvation
In 200 years, I tell myself,
this ancient oak could look back on rough beginnings
and trace each struggle and stubborn victory
in growth ring spirals and gnarled bark
roots reached down, as if to foil fate
and anchored tight against the wind that merely tousles
mighty leaves
or so I tell myself
a sprou...

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"The state of living, or having objective reality"
Living is Existence
What is Existence
Not the ice sculpture
Not the photo shopped, picture perfect version plastered on the smuck white dictionary pages
What is it to you
Existence is I, composing these words so exact and sharp as the silence sliding off the snake's tongue
As it is to you, as your eyes dissect each letter and sti...

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For those I’ve lost, those I’ve left, those I hurt and all those I walked by leaving the potential of future loves forever spinning in the realm of might have been.

How do you measure the value of a life?
Day by day meticulously noting defeats and victories
Tallying the binary source code of your programmed life?
Or is value found in the flavor of the moment?
The act of following an arbitra...

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The things that never will (or was it the Will that never thinks? Honestly it's been so long that I forgot)

I stargaze in my own room,
with thought of holding you.

The melody of songs I don't know,
make me wonder what there is to behold.
With a gentle laugh,
I stand starstruck by your words.

Like a child I stand below it all,
seeing colour that aren't letting you go,
as the stars paint a portrait of your smile,
I am caught stargazing in my own room.

And the sky turns back to white,
as t...

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listen to her

inside of you,

that constant voice

knows you better 

than anyone else.


she’s been there

when no one else was.

she knows she’ll never

steer you wrong.


she’ll direct you forward, 

& retract you 

from uncomfortable situations.

no matter if they say otherwise, 

listen to her.


friends know a side of you,

your lover knows another,

but she knows...

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looming at me she's smiling

swerving to keep her at bay

I crossed double white lines

after that things went grey


waking in her brawny arms

she whispers words of love

how we were fated to meet

the way we fit hand in glove


concussion raddling my mind

my brain limps in reverse gear

random thoughts flit like fleas

one above all else, naken fear



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No lofty dreams to weave..
No grand conquests to achieve..
Just a little nod of admission..
Just a little promise to keep.....

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