humour (Remove filter)
Smart Little Johnny
This story happened in one school
But … for God’s sake, keep cool,
it can't be taken as a rule.
Once when a teacher of math fell sick
A teacher of physical education came, named Nick.
He wanted to show how intelligent he is,
So he said: Solve my problem please!
-A car moves at a high speed.
To go to Spain a plane I need.
Can you tell me my age
If I read a book on the last page,
a pea...
Thursday 27th August 2015 3:03 pm
Smart Little Johnny
This story happened in one school
But … for God’s sake, keep cool,
it can't be taken as a rule.
Once when a teacher of math fell sick
A teacher of physical education came, named Nick.
He wanted to show how intelligent he is,
So he said: Solve my problem please!
-A car moves at a high speed.
To go to Spain a plane I need.
Can you tell me my age
If I read a book on the last page,
a pea...
Thursday 27th August 2015 3:03 pm
Smart Little Johnny
This story happened in one school
But … for God’s sake, keep cool,
it can't be taken as a rule.
Once when a teacher of math fell sick
A teacher of physical education came, named Nick.
He wanted to show how intelligent he is,
So he said: Solve my problem please!
-A car moves at a high speed.
To go to Spain a plane I need.
Can you tell me my age
If I read a book on the last page,
a pea...
Thursday 27th August 2015 3:03 pm
Humor
Humor
After drinking whisky
Some men are so frisky,
But some are so boring,
All night snoring.
***
I will not give up drinking
But I will go on thinking
If I should give up smoking
***
It’s so difficult to be kind
When all around are blind
***
She has found a coin in her bed.
It was pleasant to know
That someone wants to come back.
***
Yesterday was early,
Tomorrow will be lat...
Monday 10th August 2015 3:27 pm
Humor
Humor
After drinking whisky
Some men are so frisky,
But some are so boring,
All night snoring.
***
I will not give up drinking
But I will go on thinking
If I should give up smoking
***
It’s so difficult to be kind
When all around are blind
***
She has found a coin in her bed.
It was pleasant to know
That someone wants to come back.
***
Yesterday was early,
Tomorrow will be lat...
Monday 10th August 2015 3:23 pm
SHADES OF SURFING
~~Watching wet suited fella’s a’bobbing
Got to wondering and then some thinking
Why so much sitting, and waiting
Continuous bobbing with legs a’dangling
There goes a wave, what’s wrong with it?
Is he just enjoying a tight suited, comfortable, sit?
Occasionally... Very occasionally, whilst waiting
Activity will occur, legs and arms wildly thrashing
Damn, missed the crest. One of the bes...
Wednesday 1st July 2015 5:53 pm
Writing 'proper' poetry
Peppercorn eyes or was it peppermint eyes, does it matter?
Something...orginal eyes! Something blazing eyes...something dreamy and crapper.
Yes, so he tasted of morning breath and the blandness of saliva
but just write that he tasted of strawberries and hope because that sounds a lot nicer!
...Wait... stop! The ryhme is off!
Can you have more ryhme this time, less variation.
Sort...
Wednesday 24th June 2015 7:05 pm
That Shallot
So every year she plants some seeds
She tends to all their growing needs
Keeping the soil free from weeds
Her tidy vegetable plot
No peas or carrots does she grow
Just Alium Cepa row on row
She won a prize in't Cheshire show
The lady of shallot
with apologies to Alfred Lord Tennyson
Monday 15th June 2015 7:01 am
CHECKY TROUSERS
His name is Jeff. He’s a chef.
How can you tell? By his trousers of course.
When he puts on those checky trousers he’s no longer just Jeff,
But, Jeffry, like Mam used to scream, making herself hoarse
At his idleness, lethargy, laziness, now all in the past
Since a chef he’s become, even though it’s self-classed.
Doesn’t wear one of them tall ‘ats though.
He tried one. Couldn’t...
Monday 6th April 2015 12:21 pm
The Ballad of a Middle Aged Man
I woke up one day and was old
(Although I prefer to say middle aged.)
I was young and fit
The last time I looked
(Or As far as I could possibly gauge.)
It’s a situation that makes me unhappy
(And quite frankly that’s putting it mildly)
There’s nothing I can do
To regain my youth
(Despite jumping up and down wildly)
I still drive a sporty convertible
(I do...
Wednesday 1st April 2015 7:31 pm
The Junk Shop
I was lost among the old junk,
in the farthest of corners, when
I heard a clock ticking away.
It had a rhythm of its own,
though the ticks were separate
it appeared to echo instead,
and when I watched the clock face,
the second hand would twitch a bit
before jumping to the next notch.
'Must be a pice of junk,' I thought,
then I looked down and checked my watch,
and it read the sam...
Sunday 22nd February 2015 3:38 pm
CHECKY TROUSERS
His name is Jeff. He’s a chef.
How can you tell? By his trousers of course.
When he puts on those checky trousers he’s no longer just Jeff,
But, Jeffry, like his Mam used to scream, making herself hoarse
At his idleness, lethargy, laziness, now all in the past
Since a chef he’s become, even though it’s self-classed.
Doesn’t wear one of them tall ‘ats though.
He tried on...
Friday 13th February 2015 3:02 pm
Pissed 'n' Broke
Wednesday 4th February 2015 9:27 pm
A Bit More Choke And The Car Would Have Started
Wednesday 4th February 2015 9:21 pm
Writer's Block
Monday 26th January 2015 8:38 pm
Bunfight At The Kerbside Corral
Tuesday 20th January 2015 4:53 pm
Spirit Of Christmas
Tuesday 20th January 2015 7:55 am
Fuck it, I’m indecisive
Monday 19th January 2015 10:15 pm
Recent Comments
TobaniNataiella on New Years Resolution
33 minutes ago
Graham Sherwood on Back To Nature
48 minutes ago
Uilleam Ó Ceallaigh on Payback Time
1 hour ago
Uilleam Ó Ceallaigh on Mowing the Lawn with Larkin
1 hour ago
John Coopey on I FEAR IT WON’T END WELL
1 hour ago
Uilleam Ó Ceallaigh on Back To Nature
2 hours ago
Tom Doolan on Christmas Makes Me Cry
2 hours ago
Stephen Atkinson on Gaia's Lament
11 hours ago
Stephen Atkinson on I FEAR IT WON’T END WELL
11 hours ago
Stephen Atkinson on Payback Time
11 hours ago