Poetry Blog by Vautaw (2019, addiction)

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My Secret Life

He fools everyone
and I fool myself
in my secret life.
 
Makeup hides the bruises
in my secret life.

Distractions abound  
in my secret life.

I smile, laugh, cry, drink 
the pain away
in my secret life.

Food fills the gaps of despair
in my secret life.

I pray for salvation
in my secret life.

Hope for a better tommorow remains 
in my secret life. 

# # #

https://youtu...

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abuseaddictionfaithhopeprayerrecoveryrelationships

What is Poetry?

Poetry is my 
drug of choice,

calming rain, 
rays of sunshine. 

an antidote 
to suffering,

waltzing words
on lonely nights,

my lost lover 
whispering
in my ear,

release, 
of fear,

wind beneath
birds in flight,

illuminating 
light,

immortality...

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addictionfearlightlovepoemspoetrypoetssufferingwords

Delusions of Grandeur

How can you adore me one day

and forget I exist the next? 

Was I just another notch 

in your belt? 

Why can’t you see that your world is 

darker without me,

the one who loves you 

unconditionally. 

Someday it will all make sense.

Meanwhile, I’ll keep convincing myself

you still care.

###

https://youtu.be/kjkc7A5XoWk

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addictiondelusionslovemental illnessrelationships

Daughter

Forgive me, for not 
being the mother 
you needed me to be.

For being too busy,
too naive to see 
what was happening 
in front of me.

For being silent
when your father 
screamed and demeaned.

For when I thought it
was sweet that your 
boyfriend carried you
to your room when you 
"fell asleep".

For not enough hugs
and too many lectures.

For not seeing the signs
of addict...

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addictionconnectiondaughterfaithfamilyforgivenesshealinghellhero's journeyloverecoveryrelationships

Dancing with Addiction

How do you help
loved ones that
insist on 
tap dancing
with the demon 
of addiction?

I want to scold
them like a child
for their own good,

but I know it 
would fall
on deaf ears.

I want to hold them
tight, tell them
everything will
be alright, but
they aren't buying 
that lie.

Is my only option
to waltz around 
my candy-coated world 
and watch them
self-destruct?

I...

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addictiondancelifelovesobriety

My Dopamine

Your words flow 
though my veins 
and light up my soul 
like nothing 
I've ever known.
Chemical alchemy.
Cosmic destiny.
Beyond comprehension.
From another dimension.
Steam. My dopamine. 
 

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addictionalchemydestinydopamineloveMusepassionpoetrysoulsoulmatessteamwords

Soul Scars

There you are beaming 
at everyone you meet
posting highlights,
keeping it together. 

But, I see your soul scars...
loneliness, heartbreak,
disappointment, addiction,
depression, despair...

It's enough to turn
most souls to dust.

But not us.

Diamonds are made from 
coal under pressure.

Show your scars,
keep the faith,
and shine on.

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addictiondepressiondespairdiamondsfaithheartbreakinspirational poetrylonelinessscarsshinesoul

New Year Addiction

Those few seconds before the new year

when the countdown begins,

my soul soars with so much hope and joy.

When the ball drops at Times Square,

there is a momentary

return to innocence.

As the confetti flies and music fills the air,

I imagine we are a world at peace...

no worries, no violence, no division,

just a few beautiful seconds of clarity and simplicity

that dis...

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addictioncountdownhappy new yearhopeinnocencejoypeacerealitytimes squarevision

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