Poetry Blog by Stacy Eskin
Stuck inside my head with all the hurt that i have done
How could i have been alive when it felt like i was dead
Middle of nowhere is where i belong
In the open land not thinking about my wrongs
Take me to the place that i truely want to be
With the stars and the grass, the dirt and the trees
Giving it up, letting it go
Trying to face being alone, when i just want to pack u...
Thursday 21st May 2020 11:32 pm
Walking in , feeling afraid
Having to give up the drugs that used to protect
Cant hide, can't coast, this is a matter of life and death.
Sometimes do more, sometimes do less
No more fooling around, it's time to open up and confess
Confess to your rights, confess to your wrongs
I know i'll be alright as long as i'm willing to give up the fight.
Easier said than done i know,...
Thursday 21st May 2020 11:07 pm
It doesn't get easier, it never will
You are gone and the world is remaining still
All those happy memories even bad ones, i will hold close
My heart is shattered, my best friend doesn't have a pulse.
There's so much i want to tell you, so much you need to hear
The fact that im alone again is enough to trigger the fear
But, i know you would say be strong he doesn't deserve ...
Saturday 18th April 2020 6:02 pm
I don't know how you feel because you never say,
So lost in questions, it gives me anxiety to this very day
Will you ever open up to me or am i just wasting my time
Somedays you seem interested, other days you don't
God, can you just please give me a sign
Not knowing drives me crazy, i need reassurance, which you can't provide
I'm paranoid and uneasy that everything will just sh...
Sunday 5th April 2020 9:42 pm
Tears running through my eyes without stopping
Im mad at you for letting this happen
On your birthday, i recieved the worst news, that you were dead
Best friend i know all those times you heard what the fuck i said.
You told me you were clean and i was so proud, I just wanted us to be clean together
Remember that promise we made of always and forever
But then your funeral came a...
Sunday 12th January 2020 10:12 pm
Dear best friend,
The day I got that text my whole world fell apart
Hearing that my best friend is gone literally broke my heart
I wish I can hear your voice one last time, spend one last moment with you
God seemed to have another plan and it didn’t involve me, but bestie you’re suppose to be here with me too.
You were my best friend of 16 years, all the heartbreaks and fights, YO...
Sunday 12th January 2020 5:50 pm
Addiction is hard to explain, unless you have been there
You truely can't understand anyone's pain
It's being caught between the devil and hell
Not wanting to use, but needing to, all you want to do is yell
So loudly but softly so nobody can hear, the torment in your voice, the sadness in your eyes
Is when you really know shit just got real
Being so sick, choice is no longer an...
Friday 8th November 2019 11:37 pm
I cant believe this happened again, how did this happen again
You were so good to me but all of a sudden you just freely left
Was it hard for you to leave, to leave me in the dark
Damn, im still in shock that you just put your car in park.
I know your friend committed suicide, but thats not why u left
You just flat out didn't want me and used that as an excuse, excuse or not
Sunday 27th October 2019 2:32 am
You were my moon on a dark lonely night
really thought i found someone
turns out you were just a clouded light
maybe it was to soon, maybe you weren't ready
It wasn't love, how could it be, you barely did anything freely
I knew it was over when you kept making excuses not to see me
All the stuff we did, all the things you said to make me believe in you
I guess i let my guard ...
Sunday 27th October 2019 2:03 am
I didn't know how to live
Stuck in a continuous cycle
Being my own worst captive
The devil had a hold, i couldn't break free
The devil was in control
And that's when you decided to leave me
I sat and shot and shot some more
I didn't know what to do, didnt know how to stop
Then i woke up and realized it wasn't a dream
I had lost the man who ever meant something to me
Monday 21st October 2019 1:17 am
I need to set free
i need to let go of the resentments of whatever might of happened to me
It's not my fault but it is ok to cry, and to be afraid of anything coming down the line
Yesterday is history, the future is a mystery
So stay in touch with today and be all you can be
It's not going to be easy, this thing called life
It's going to be extremely hard, but as long as you keep...
Monday 21st October 2019 1:02 am
I feel as though it was just yesterday being dope sick and tired
I had enough mainly because i got a little to wild
I could't eat, couldn't sleep, barely could breathe
Those chills and sweats man i couldn't believe
i let something like that happen to me.
I slipped and got lost couldn't be found
Depressed and sad couldnt get myself off the ground.
Alone and scared didnt know...
Monday 21st October 2019 12:36 am