Yes, a mandatory retirement age in Congress

I believe it's time has arrived

We will base the age on FDR's fireside chat

And if you heard the broadcast live

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The earth's temperature will increase 1 degree this century

For climatologists this is the sum of all their fears

It was 15 to 18 degrees hotter on earth for the dinosaurs

Then again, they only lasted 200 million years

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Made arrangements to go away for my anniversary

Which then did render a thought

Does my wife really enjoy vacationing with me

Or am I her last resort

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At age 80 Harrison Ford makes another adventure movie

I guess the storyline is acceptable

Although, Indiana Jones can now only enter caves

If they are handicap accessible

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Georgia, when submitting digital driver's license pictures

Please wear clothes when due

The word mirror should be the only time

We use phrase, rear view

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Displayed on my dentist office wall, "A smile is a whisper of a laugh"

I quietly sit there in intending doom

It is meant to be a soothing thought

While screaming seeping from another room

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Bobi the oldest dog in the world just turned 31

Still his favorite thing to do is to ride in the car

Also loves to bark at children to get off his lawn

And he'll fetch bones if he remembers where they are

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Great Britain has a terrible squirrel problem

Now animal control blames budget cuts

British scientists working on a contraceptive pill

Since trying to neuter them, is just nuts

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The Flat Earth Society is looking to grow in popularity

Althouigh their ideas you may scoff

Going to the ends of the earth to find supporters

Since membership has fallen off

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Unfortunately, there is a large doctor shortage

New medical students, just not there

Especially proctology, gynecology, ears, nose and throat

There are several openings here

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Gone in a glimpse

That life you once knew

Convinced it's a nightmare

"This can't be true"

Then keeper of dreams

Declares

"You're Awake"

You cry " It's not real

Must be a mistake! "

But weeks became weirder

Hair growing long

Some of those beards

Are seriously wrong

No more

Are the handshakes

There's limited hugs

We're all masked up now

Not just the...

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MY HOLIDAY

Travelled up upon the train, all was very good
it brought me in to Sheffield, exactly as it should

I got into a big black cab, outside the station door
from there i had a journey, as i'd never had before

The driver was a lunatic, either that or drunk
to make my journey even worse, he positively stunk

The traffic was quite heavy and very very slow
so he drove up on...

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A REALLY BAD DAY

I got up really early, the sun was in the sky
I thought "i'll do the laundry,i'm bound to get it dry,
 
I sorted out the lights and darks, and put the first load in
It washed it and it rinsed it, but then refused to spin.

In anger and frustration, I opened up the door
the water left the washing and drowned the kitchen floor.

I went to make a coffee and the kettle b...

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I am blessed with loving family and friends,
Who've given me things like memories and teddy bears.
They've also given things to be enjoyed for a time,
Like pretty flowers and chocolates divine....

But none of them have ever given me that which my dog did,
A dead rat and a coughing fit.
She dropped the prize at my feet, I bent down to study it,
And she licked my face, oh s...

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