Real love is life threatening 

It’s not serene, sweet, dream love

It’s not romantic, rainbow love

No

True love is torture 

Gut wrenching pain

Hands and knees, love 

Need it to breathe, love 

It’s enough to put you away, love 

But never pull you away, love 

It’s masochistically addictive 

It titillates and irritates

Possesses every bit 

Until you have a fit

Read and leave comments (1)

Please use this scalpel to bleed the color from my veins
For now I know each measure of beauty comes with equal measure of pain
Oh, how cruel the price we pay, in the ignorant throes of joy
We revel without knowing what soon we will destroy
The world once bright, and hearts delight
Now stings this tearful eye
I never thought that you and me
would have to say goodbye
So as you leave, taking...

Read and leave comments (0)

This misery does not like company
Though I meet it for coffee each morning at 6
It shuns the beseeching touch of others
Though each night we sleep entwined like lovers
        Or vagrants huddling together for warmth
This misery turns all words of praise to spite
Though it hovers by my shoulder all day like a proud parent
      Or a voyeur perversely pleasured by my failures
This misery ha...

Read and leave comments (2)

As pain and jealousy give way to wonder and gratitude , I realize the beauty of a love that opens ones eyes to life. The time between the yearned for reunion or unfathomable new beginning, fades like the forgotten darkness that comes in the blink of an eye. Whether a rekindling of old love - renewed by perspective - or the birth of new love - when one gathers the strength to carry the hole in thei...

Read and leave comments (0)

Why when I look do I see only the wounds and not the victory they have bought?

Why, when I cast inward, are all that’s cast back the echoes of pain and not the gentle reminder of suffering’s end?

Why can I not express my feelings directly instead of disguising them in tedious metaphor?

What game do I play with myself and why am I surprised that even when I win I lose?

These thoughts be...

Read and leave comments (0)

Am I mad to miss the pain of your loss?

After initially numb, flattened by the utterly incomprehensible gift of spiritual closure, of forgiveness,

I am now bereft.

Was this bloody burden truly such an integral appendage as to leave me stumbling at the absence of its crushing weight?

I seem to have forgotten the me that lay hidden beneath the shroud of loss. It’s cloying, gropi...

Read and leave comments (0)

i never imagined living to this age 

and maybe that’s why it all feels so surreal 

the younger version of me lost hope so quickly 

i never planned to reach this day 

i don’t want to celebrate 

i don’t want to blow out any candles 

or open any gifts

i want to feel better 

i’m spending the couple nights before i turn twenty relapsing alone in a cold room 

there is nothing ...

Read and leave comments (1)

When she folded into herself

You all looked away

When she unraveled

You all watched

Read and leave comments (2)

It’s hidden well, but I search deep within the crevices of your mind.
I interpret your words and actions to depict intention and longing, want and need.
They’re masked behind masculinity; hidden within the social construct that disallows you to be free....to feel.
That which praises to the appeal of lust; turns love to dust.
Strong enough to break a woman’s heart, but no strength to trust us.

Read and leave comments (2)

Read and leave comments (0)

A heart full of hurt, wanting to unleash pain 

A heart not strong enough to endure all

But I find solace in our times together

I give that which I can't get, I have what I can't give,

Our moments gives me nothing but peace

Did you regret it?

A knowable answer 

Was it worth it?

A question never asked

But I find hope in my love.

I know nothing will change

Nevertheles...

Read and leave comments (0)

Painful embers stab the dark

Of pain too rich to bear

Callous flames, beguile a heart

Left stained by acrid air

Dreams denied by rancid thoughts

On lips too vain to care

Lifetimes lost in frozen eyes

A soul beyond repair

Read and leave comments (1)