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Jetty Song

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Her fingers tracing mine
Lily danced me out of the garden
those green eyes brimming lively 
with purest abandon
Then barefoot on the boardwalk
her summer dress riding high
she leapt onto the jetty 
and gestured to the sky

We let our tanned legs hang below
as we bottomed up the bottle
the air was hot and heavy
the sea around us peaceful
There was lust upon our minds
as a veil upon a bride
the deepest searing truths 
politely shot between our eyes

And no man could deny us
loose and open all the time
our hands and fingers; wanderers
tongues locked in a rhyme
By the spit between those kisses 
our burning lips were sewn
her dress was barely there 
my body carved from stone

With each nail driven into skin
I felt a clapping thunder
the temple tapestry was tearing
as she pierced my thin armour
A melody sung upon her voice
a lyric loudly grows
I'd have gladly turned my back 
on all that I held close

We could have traveled every sea
taking turns to lead the way
if only
if only she'd have asked me
if only I'd thought to stay…

Dusk light falling on the harbour
the day became a dream
with toes curled round the boards
she danced me to my feet
in one movement I was shirtless
in another she was naked
a smiling glance was shared 
as we leapt with fingers knitted

Our kisses painted salty
lungs burning between breaths
the solution we had longed for
as our bodies coalesced
We swam until our limbs ached 
then floated side by side
in the moonlit wideness of her eyes;
another world, I spied

I was so thirsty for the moment 
and drank it all too quickly
my mind got blurred and cloudy
my greatest drunken folly
Too naive to know the value
of the treasure in my grip
like sand through careless fingers
I stood and watched it slip

There was water on three sides 
and only one path back to land
but somewhere on that journey
I somehow lost her hand
Now, I wonder if she thinks of us
a moment spared for all we shared
does she ever sit upon that jetty
singing of a parallel despair

We could have traveled every sea
wild adventure every day
if only
if only she'd have asked me
if only I'd thought to stay

If only 
I'd had the wisdom
to stay...

 

[2020]

desirefollylost lovelovesongwisdomyouth

◄ Ocean's Roar

A Most Comfortable Prison ►

Comments

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Tom

Mon 7th Sep 2020 13:55

Thank you to Neressa and Flavia for your recent comments! So pleased you found and enjoyed this one ?

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Flavia Gordon

Sat 5th Sep 2020 21:30

Regret, passion, longing. ❤❤❤❤
This is one I will revist....often.?
Well done.

<Deleted User> (19980)

Thu 6th Aug 2020 16:36

Beautifully written...what a sensual journey!

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Don Matthews

Mon 18th May 2020 00:58

I'm glad you did lots fiddling
Fiddled day n night
Was really worth your fiddling effort
To me you got it right

?

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Tom

Sun 17th May 2020 11:06

Don & Kim, thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed the spice and the rhythm?

Victoria, I definitely had the siren idea (if not mermaids exactly) in my mind when writing it. I ended up excising a couple of lines that would have made that more explicit.

JC, I'm so pleased you enjoyed this one. Thanks for the Betjeman link, I like that a lot (hadn't seen it before). Funnily enough my mum lives in Pershore and always insists on meeting me in a cafe by the Abbey - we can barely hear each other speak over the tolling of those bells! ?

Jennifer and Jordyn, thank you both so much. This was a fun experiment for me.

And Jordyn, it's interesting you picked out that line - this was one of 3 or 4 lines that kept me plugging on with writing this.

Thanks all, I'm so grateful to get some readers on this one as it was the most fiddly thing I've written in quite some time.

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John Coopey

Sat 16th May 2020 10:42

Lovely tale of regret. Reminded me of this poem by Betjeman, Tom.

https://lisaboo83.tumblr.com/post/120437791380/pershore-station-or-a-liverish-journey-first/amp

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victoriavautaw@gmail.com

Sat 16th May 2020 04:18

Love it! Reminds me of a mermaid. Siren of the sea! ❤️

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kimberly

Sat 16th May 2020 04:13

I agree with Don here that the imagery and spice of it kept the reader’s interest and the rhyming works. ?

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Don Matthews

Fri 15th May 2020 23:47

This is interesting.

I usually am not attracted to long poems. I fall asleep halfway.
When I got to the line 'her summer dress riding high' I thought hello? a bit of spice could be coming up. (So read on Don....)

I did, and suddenly 'her dress was barely there'. (interest develops...)

What next I thought?... 'in one movement I was shirtless' ...(go Tom)

Then 'in another she was naked'

Then the climax 'as our bodies coalesced'

You needn't worry about not holding my attention in a long poem with spice like this peppered through it Tom.

Re the rhyming - to me it doesn't have to rhyme throughout. You have thrown in some for a bit of variety. i like that. As a rhymer meter is important to me. It has to flow and bounce along (even if not rhyme). You do this well.

I like your couples time/rhyme, sewn/stone, breaths/coalesced, side/spied, quickly/folly, grip/slip, thunder/armour, grows/close

Don't put yourself down. I like your peppered rhyming here.....




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Jordyn Elizabeth

Fri 15th May 2020 21:26

I enjoyed the entire poem, but there was one line that I fell for;
"There was lust upon our minds as a veil upon a bride." Reading that left me smiling.
Well done.
-J

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jennifer Malden

Fri 15th May 2020 14:38

Nice! Great passion, and beautifully expressed regrets.

Jennifer

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