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Karen Robinson

Updated: Fri, 1 Jun 2012 01:15 am

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I have come to writing poetry halfway through my life and have tapped into something that I didn't know was there. I started by writing humorous rhyming verse and recently have tried my hand at something a little more serious.I have two styles and I'm not sure which one I'm better at. I write about things that occur to me in my life, anything from fake tan to the current vampire craze. I have done a lot of acting so performance is in my blood, although I have never performed my own work live in public. That's pretty scary and I'm not quite sure where to start. I have however set various pieces of work to music and have recorded them and I have a few tracks on soundcloud


The Dentist I really must visit the dentist It’s been on my mind for some time But I’m really not keen on revealing The things that he’s likely to find He’ll say “Oh good grief, just look at your teeth I’m afraid they’re far from the cleanest Stifle your groans, just take out a loan And ensure that you see my hygienist” The hygienist of course is a sadist Why else would you take on that job? Torture disguised as a treatment And a chance to stick pins in your gob. It seems I might need a mortgage I regret I was never insured Though I have two teeth which are broken, He’s refusing my club card reward. The dentist is umming and aahing He’s only just now getting started He’s trying to look at my fillings If only my lips could be parted “Get out of my mouth you dentistry lout Leave my holes and my fillings alone In fact I’m not free can’t you see I’m busy I really do need to go home” He’s got his syringe he’s going to infringe The privacy of my poor gums The Nurse has a frown she’s got me held down All I need to do now is succumb. I’m hearing the drill I think I feel ill I’m not sure if I’m numb yet or not. I can’t open wide, I’m sorry I lied That’s no hole, just a small blackish dot. Give me a general I’ll be calm and convivial. “OK madam you’re done, you can rinse.” My god is it done, I’m so glad that I’ve come Piece of cake – and without even a wince! Fifty If your bod can’t cut the mustard and it’s worn and rather busted. If the stairs and you agree that they’re too much for your knee If your butt is in the gutter and your tits can’t raise a flutter You get all flushed and flirty with workmen under thirty If the weight of all your slap means your chin will need a strap and your mind goes for a wander.. When you wish you’d been born blonder There’s bits of you turned warty.... It’s because you’re well past forty. Is your hairdo’s looking skunky are you’re feeling slightly chunky? When once you were a milf sadly no one wants a gilf (grandma). If hairs begin to sprout where you have to pull them out Your words come out quite strange And you feel a bit deranged. You’re grumpy dry and ratty With a smile like Nora Batty your age rhymes with nifty Then you must be over fifty. Ageing you confess means, frankly you‘re a mess. There should be compensation for this age degeneration, While the body’s in decline Something else become sublime …Hold that thought for just one second this brain is acting strangely fecund, I need to note a thought so clever before it slips away forever.. Goddamn it when I’ve been profound pen and paper can’t be found.. Hurry up stop your tarting find it quick the thought’s departing.. Hang on though, just one second ..what the hell is flippin’ “fecund”

All poems are copyright of the originating author. Permission must be obtained before using or performing others' poems.

Audio entries by Karen Robinson

grumpy summer (12/08/2013)

Handsfree (08/09/2012)

The Dentist (03/09/2012)

Tangram Crackers (06/06/2012)

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John Coopey

Mon 24th Sep 2012 22:22

Glad you liked Shandy Man, Karen. Thankyou for your kind posting.

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Jeff Dawson

Fri 7th Sep 2012 18:15

Hi Karen, welcome to WOL, I run the open mic nights in Bolton where WOL was founded, hope you like the site, its done me proud since joining 4 years ago! Performance poetry, running gigs, playing guitar!

Enjoyed your dentist poem, not a million miles from something I wrote - see link (and still perform as a good punk rant) 3 years ago

best wishes Jeff X

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Karen Robinson

Mon 3rd Sep 2012 16:23

Thank you for the nice comments.

I have a recording of me reading The Dentist which I will upload.

I haven't got used to finding my way round this site yet.

<Deleted User> (6895)

Sun 2nd Sep 2012 18:40

Welcome Karen.Nice 'samples'
what a coincidence re the hygienist!
I,m off to see him/her tomorrow
and help him/her to get richer-ugh!xx

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Sun 2nd Sep 2012 13:08

The denist brightened up my sunday morning at work,made me smile--I think we can all relate to what you have written in this amazing piece of verse .Every dentist should have this up on their notice board and patients reading it would smile and feel more relaxed in the torture chair.

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Graham Sherwood

Tue 5th Jun 2012 22:44

Welcome to WOL Karen.

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Ann Foxglove

Tue 5th Jun 2012 11:20

Hi Karen - welcome to WOL. Great poems here on your profile, and they would sound really good as a performance pieces. Re knowing where to start with performing your stuff, Write Out Loud has a really good gig guide (complete with map!) so you could take a look and see if there is anywhere near you that has an open mic and go along. I'm sure you'll love it! And if you put a poem on the blog section here I'm sure you'll get some feedback - might help you decide which type of poetry you're best at. But hey! Why not just do both anyway! ;)

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Karen Robinson

Sun 3rd Jun 2012 11:21

Buy a map. You may have to travel!

Good luck finding a new one, though with only one filling perhaps you won't need to. You obviously have strong teeth. Or you are very young!!

Thank you for the welcome.

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Tommy Carroll

Fri 1st Jun 2012 01:21 there's a thought. Welcome to W O L Karen. Tommy
PS I have been told today that my Dentist's practice is to close at end of June- any advice?
PPS I have only one filling.

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