to be a gambler
is to claim to be
a prophet
a shaman
a predictor of
the future

to be a gambler
is to be insane
delirious
mad
because you know
you are right

seer
soothsayer
clairvoyant
fortune teller
diviner
prognosticator

the feeling is
sublime
is perfect
is something greater
than life

until you lose
but even that’s
okay

because you had
that feeling
that gift
...

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He said to her,
‘I’ve got a
Porsche,
you know.’

She sipped her
drink and
then replied,
‘But have you
got a
big dick?
I can always
get
the bus!’

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‘Was your ex’s dick bigger than this?’

I asked

holding up my large battered sausage to her.

‘How big do you think that is?’

she asked.

‘9 inches,’ I approximated.

‘Well yeah, as big, but it was fatter than that.

He said it was

nine and half long and

seven around.’

I nodded and laughed

but inside

I think I was crying.

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‘Does my bum look big in this?’

she asked.

‘Your bum looks big in

everything,’ I explained.

‘Are you serious?’ she said.

‘It takes a bum to know a bum,’

I replied, ‘and this is between us;

it don’t concern you.

In fact, me and your

exquisite behind

have been having a

fantastic relationship for

some time now.

We’ve been seeing

each other

...

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This night is like

Any night

But a candle knows best

And flickers

Dancing its own volition

I guess I’m lonely

Like the moth

I’m too intrigued

The darkness lingers

But it is not enough

I have come here to burn

You look at me

Your face the

Only thing I see

You smile

I smile back

But in the blackness

...

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them rattling dirty hours

when

night melted away

and

the sun boiled up

and we were

there

inside

ripped

torn

straight off the

bone

them days were

hard

but essential

deadly but

so on fire

them days were

slow and

vicious

new and

easy

we were doing something

inevitable

reaching ou...

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I hate the way TV personalities

stare at me

from the screen

like they know me

like they wanna talk or

hold my hand

or reach in and

rub my heart

the way they fucking

smile

from their perfect

made-up flesh

they say ‘I am this

and

you want to be me

to know me

to look like me

come this way and I’ll

show you

a th...

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all you can do is

come home

and drink

yourself

away

and wait

for the next day

another slow

languid

tiresome

rotten day

another day

hung

with suffering

suicide

blues and

hatred

with banality

futility

apathy

and

much less

that day

and another

on and

on

it goes

...

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Hello everyone,

I've got a new poetry chapbook, 'Room is Brutal' out with erbacce-press, as well as 'These Dirty Nothings'.

http://www.erbacce-press.com/#/david-mac/4541938102

Buy one, or both, and gimme some money so I can buy some wine.

Also have my own self-published books available from my email address.

lutonghoul@hotmail.co.uk

Cheers,

David Ma...

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The days burn

almost as much

as the nights

ever did

and yes you’re still a

blonde maniac

but your tits are good

and your arse is good

and your pussy is

very good

and I love that

small roll of fat

over your jeans

or the way you

spit out your gum or

smoke half a cigarette

or belch

just like a man

It’s ...

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She said, ‘Argh! I’m such a nightmare, babe!’

People bore me too much,

bore me to death,

that’s why I drink,

that’s why I do what I do.

When I’ve had a drink I’m having

such a good time.

I think I drink to find people

more interesting,

not so boring.

You know?’

I nodded down the phone.

Then she slurred, ‘Argh! I’m

such a nightmare!...

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The job interview

is the biggest lie.

Two people sit

facing each other

in a room

in the world.

One asks questions.

One answers.

None of these questions matter.

None are human.

One tells how great it is

to work in this company.

One says how much they

really want the job.

You reckon you can do it?

...

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Our poems make love

Coz we do not

Our poems walk the streets

Looking for a place to go

They meet up secretly

And check into seedy hotels

On the edge of town

And fuck it all away

Till there’s nothing left

No day and no night

Our poems are lovers

We are not

But our poems always

Tell it

Better than we could

Ever ho...

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You have to take what you want

You have to take

Everything

You have to take what you

Deserve

Before the other guy does

Take it all

Before it’s too late

Before the sun comes down

On us

Again

Oh well

Take everything there is

It’s yours

If you want it

If you need it

Tell yourself that

Take it

Do

...

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We all move

with such purpose

We stretch out

in all directions

onwards

Shit, we’ve got

such important

things

to get done

But all the way there’s

a little bit of

death

in our skulls or

pressing down on our

backs

The sun will shine

or it will not

There will be light

or there will not

We get tangled...

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I always wanted an extraordinary life,

and I think that I’ve

never been able to accept its

lack of meaning.

I wanted purpose and reason but

there is none.

It’s all run out, been taken,

been used up by the

brave.

It’s a con.

So I want nothing,

I am not interested either way.

I have grown bored.

I cannot heal or roll over,

...

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The sadness can

build up around you

if you let it

It can tower over

and

surround you

so that when you look  it’s

all you can see

It stacks up like

piles of stone

jagged rocks

and the daylight can’t get through

But for a while you

like it this way and

it’s good the daylight can’t get through

You’re left alone

...

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Some days

you’re the genius

Others days

you’re the fool

There is not much

in between

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Once it starts

it just don’t stop

Once it comes

it will not leave

It has you

and

you’re done for

The habit forms

the discipline

and there’s

nothing you can do

An invisible gun

pointed at the skull

pressed up

to the temple

and the voice

a whisper

a haunting chant:

write

write

write…

You dare

...

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We all learn to push our luck

We push and push

until it

runs out

until it

breaks and says

‘Get outta here

I’m done with you!’

Of course you have to

have the luck

to begin with

Only then can you

abuse it

You are lucky

then you are unlucky

You are unlucky

then you are lucky

That is just the way of things

Per...

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Time and happiness

Time for happiness

Time is the meaning

Don’t ask me

I didn’t

make it this way

Just like Adam and Eve

alone in the garden

with just space

and time

and nothing else

no one else

Time is the answer

To just be

in love

with the one

you love

(as God suggested

apparently)

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Pointless days

follow

pointless days

but no one will

admit this

they don’t like

to see it

But you see it

I know you

do

They get up for

no reason at all

They strain

and fuss

and stress

and worry

about nothing

at all

It is not

important

There is only

life

and then there’s

deat...

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You continue with your shitty life

And I’ll continue with mine

We’ll forget each other

One day, I’m sure

Just not yet

And I’m only infatuated with

Your look

Your face

Your smile

Your sexy body

But not you

Not yourself

You come in here and

Chase away the word

Make me question everything

Just who do you think you are?

...

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The women want to kill you

The men want to fuck you

And I think to myself

What a wonderful world

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I am not designed for life

not fit for it

I’m merely not strong enough

a weak, hopeless

pathetic template

And this dark mood

this deathly visitor

is inside me now

all the way deep

gripping my skull

cutting my thoughts

making it hard enough

just trying to breathe

So I lay here

as lost as stone

a thing neither dead nor alive

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A madman tucked up

sweet in a lullaby

A whore in the dark

These shadows cleanse

pulling everything

below the surface

Don’t you see

we’re made of tears?

I don’t know where

you are

which means

you’re gone once more

So I drink myself away

We are both lost

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All the way through the job interview I

desperately wanted to shout out the word

‘cunt’ very loudly. I don’t know why

but I did. I wanted to

spit it, hiss it,

scream it out in my interviewers’ faces.

I wanted to howl and growl and

bark it. I wanted them all

to know. But

I never. I just

sat there thinking:

‘cunt, cunt, cunt!’

And it’s the fact that

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Look at you

with your

perfect hair

perfect skin

perfect teeth

perfect cheekbones

perfect lips

perfect smile

perfect blowjobs

perfect tan

perfect tits

perfect pecs

perfect abs

perfect bellybutton ring

perfect tattoo

perfect sex change

perfect facelift

perfect body

perfect meat & bone

p...

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Somewhere during the car journey

I lost my love for you.

I’m sure I had it with me

when I left.

M1, M25, M4,

it’s on one of them, I’m sure,

but I lost it on the way.

And when I turn into your street

and I spot you waving,

I drive my car fast,

straight, headlong,

into your smile.

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You corrupt

You infiltrate

You come in from the cold

Constructed from stone

You cross the room

You claim everything you want

And I can only watch

Dumb frozen

As you destroy the room with your mood

Daggers from your eyes

Knives from your lips

I clutch my chest. I fall through the floor

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You, missing

Like a tooth from a skull

And it tongues the bloody gap where it was

You, missing

Like a fingernail torn off

And the weeping surface is left sore and confused

You, missing

Like an arm ripped away in a car crash

Then the strange life without it not understood

You, missing

Like the cigarette on the back of a hand

You alway...

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Night. Strange blue coming in,

my wild head eating up thoughts,

the clock’s noose around my neck.

And there’s a large number of sheep in this tomb,

about 2 per second,

for hours now.

There’s a thick panic when I discover birdsong:

it’s early it’s late,

it’s morning it’s night.

Perhaps a drink will soften the blow

as the quick hours fall

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You wake up so horny

You want to hump

Something

Anything

And you want the hump to go on forever

To never stop

To blow fast

To last

This great effort, this

Sexy hump

But your bed’s empty

And you’re all alone

And your hand looks at you

You swear it’s giving you the eye

So you smile back

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The bed is full of bad dreams

Scattered under sheets

That crunch into my flesh

Like broken glass.

I don’t sweep them away

Coz I can’t.

I love you but

You’re a nightmare.

I take you to bed all the same.

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In the busy cafe I finish my giant hangover fry-up

Wipe my mouth and slurp my tea

Then lean thoughtfully to the left

In order to let rip great apocalyptic trumpet blast

Just to show all these brain-dead bastards

That I mean business

But just before the release

My girl hisses: ‘Don’t you fucking dare!’

So I put my sad cheek back down and

Prepare to sulk

My...

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We done it up the side of that pub,

in December,

outside with no johnny.

And I didn’t know you

and you didn’t know me;

we didn’t know where the other had been.

You kept looking down at your gut

and saying: ‘God, I’m so fat!’

I wondered if he was listening.

I just belched and fucked you faster,

as it was cold and

I needed another drin...

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Airplanes have been flying too close to our sun today.

Heart shapes have been spotted floating in the sky,

not UFOs as reported in the press, and your aura is

fluffy hot pink as usual, a supplication for red roses.

And speaking of those heart shapes of ours, you

open my chest like a box of chocolates

only to find nothing there but the words

‘Back Soon’.

We both k...

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Cleaning the inside of ambulances,

£5.90 an hour,

four till midnight.

White vehicle lit up in the darkness.

Blood, puke,

shit, piss,

mucus,

tissue, gunk, juice,

some other fluids,

not yet known to me,

but human matter,

splattered and sprayed wildly,

sticky under foot,

mesmerising…

What a mess.

So we scrub and mop and wipe,

clean an...

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Your dark eyes peep from your

limbo. Hidden and obscured by your

sadness. You little fool.

There’s no easy way to explain to you

how all the others smile. And

what do they smile at that you cannot?

Their obscene faces stretch out in the sun,

well, don’t worry about it baby coz

I don’t get it either.

If they knew the truth they’d

never dare smile again.

...

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He’s leant over the urinal, drunk, his head against the wall,

dick hanging out between his hands,

wet stain on his trousers. And he moans when

you enter, eyes rolling back, zombified!

‘You alright boy eh? You okay now son?’ he slurs.

You nod and smile, look away, choose the furthest cubicle.

You hear his dirty old wheeze, his movements slow and shuffling.

You come ou...

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What an awful view

each morning.

This is it:

Q W E R T Y U I O P

  A S D F G H J K L

    Z X C V B N M

What’s it mean?

Ah, it means nothing.

It is awful.

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The restaurant was busy, but during their meal

the woman suddenly screamed and just

stabbed her guy in the eye with her fork.

The crowd went mad all hooting and babbling.

We pissed ourselves laughing at it all,

all this new madness, and my girl asked me,

‘So, what do you think he said to her?’

‘Well,’ I replied, ‘if I had to guess, I would say

that he just told h...

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We’re all just loners

Trying to smile,

Most of the time,

Or curling up

On the carpet.

Just a little more

In the sun,

A moment, is that

A glimmer in your eye

Reflecting me?

I stay out of your world

And you stay out of mine,

It’s how the stars get by.

We glow individually.

One day, baby, we’ll

Rub our fat worlds

Tog...

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You creep into my dreams the same way you creep into my poems.

In my dream last night I was driving my car. But I heard your voice.

You were far off, talking to my mum.

Then you walked into my old bedroom.

And I got up off the bed and went over to you, and

kissed you on the cheek,

not the lips.

See?

Even in my dreams I know we’re over.

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Dead fish floating on the surface of the sky,

your smile is like a red bag of nails,

your heart is black mud,

your skin – cool as glass.

Bubbles fizz in my bottle, they

measure time,

the time in which we

don’t say a word.

This silence can kill but

there’s no such thing as silence anyhow.

Deep down I want my ideas to eat you.

Deep down I want to say so...

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She lives by the dawn

and the birds’ talk

when she comes

forces me to wake

to remember

her face

rising

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The poem turns up when it wants to

When it’s ready

And everyone is happy

I do as I’m told

I follow orders

Precisely

The blues, the bottle

The words in between

And whatever’s left

Crumbles and

Falls away

Sometimes it’s so simple

Not hard

It’s just like that

The poems scratch to be

Let in, they

Crawl across th...

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Shooting your load at least

three times a day

in the same way you

shoot your poems.

Hot and mad, burning

behind the eyes,

the maniac’s grin,

the words no one’ll know

but you. These

dirty nothings are

all your own,

you speak them to yourself

over and over as

you rub it out, as

you work it.

A gush, a spill, a flow

everywhere. Just

...

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