humour (Remove filter)
Breaking Bad for Christmas
Breaking Bad’s at last run out
Walt and Jess got even
Bodies lying all about
Someone’s finally leavin’
Can’t get by on Game of Thrones?
Not a fan of Dexter?
If you want more Breaking Bad
Here’s a Christmas Extra
Heather Page and Stan Bymee
Lived in Alberquerque
Stan was cooking crystal meth
Heather breeding turkeys
They went on a date or two
But it came ...
Friday 12th December 2014 6:26 pm
THE TEAR
What, to you, does a tear signify?
Joy, pain, sadness, or just something in the eye.
How do you respond? Grasp the shoulders and share the joy,
Hold her close and reveal that it’s a boy.
Give a sympathetic cuddle with it's irritating stroking
Sorry, didn’t realise it was your eye I was poking.
© Jack Purvis OOPs
Sunday 30th November 2014 8:58 am
IT'S SO HOT
It’s so hot
Let’s stop here my lady
It’s so cool, and
The trees are so shady
Oh! it’s so hot
Come, let us undress and do without
Us! M’lady, I’ll not bare my plums
I’ll sit and look out,
And, warn you if anyone comes
Very well. Please give a genteel shout
She unlaced her bloused top
Bared her chest. Not to entice
Splashed them, once, then twice
Stooping low, her breasts they did...
Sunday 9th November 2014 10:30 am
Poem for Germany
Deutschland, Deutschland
über the moon
you won’t be sober
any time soon.
Sunday 13th July 2014 10:57 pm
More whelks, Bishop?
One of my favourite opening sentences in all the world is the opening line to Anthony Burgess’ novel Earthly Powers:
“It was the afternoon of my eighty-first birthday, and I was in bed with my catamite when Ali announced that the archbishop had come to see me.”
Being not very well read, I haven’t actually read the book but I am sure it is rather good as the first sentence is stunning and mad...
Thursday 27th February 2014 1:40 pm
No, I Am Not!
Answering the question if she is friendly with alcohol,
she replied honestly:
No, I am not.
But the relationship I support.
Saturday 8th February 2014 2:00 pm
I Compare Thee To A Roast Dinner
From my new book:- A Floristry of Palpitations
I COMPARE THEE TO A ROAST DINNER
As cool as a sprout,
and more fragrant than a cabbage -
You turned me on with your Yorkshire Pudding wit.
Your potato looks, and carrot personality
attracted me like gravy to a plate.
Your cauliflower skin, and garden pea humour
was as passionate as a roast beef kiss.
Your solicitor was ...
Sunday 19th January 2014 10:23 am
NEW YEAR AT JACK AND JACKIE'S PLACE
Before we moved home my wife and I hosted a New Year Party with usually over twenty attending. We introduced the old fashioned entertainment of singing, poetry, story telling. I wrote the following after the last one.
~~NEW YEAR AT JACK AND JACKIE’S PLACE
THE LONG ROOM AWAITED
GLITTERING AND GOLD
TABLE PREPARED TO ENSURE GUESTS WERE SATED
WINE PRESENTED ENSURING THE WHITES WERE COLD
...
Sunday 12th January 2014 1:11 pm
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