Breaking Bad for Christmas

Breaking Bad’s at last run out

Walt and Jess got even

Bodies lying all about

Someone’s finally leavin’

Can’t get by on Game of Thrones?

Not a fan of Dexter?

If you want more Breaking Bad

Here’s a Christmas Extra


Heather Page and Stan Bymee

Lived in Alberquerque

Stan was cooking crystal meth

Heather breeding turkeys

They went on a date or two

But it came to nothin’

Till one day they realized

Turkeys needed stuffing


In his underpants all day

Stan was busy cooking

Heather in her rubber gloves

Did the turkey plucking

Brightly shone the goods that night

Quality looked fine

Bagged it, shoved it out of sight

Where the sun don’t shine.


Feds came round to check the lab

Took away a turkey

Cut it open on a slab

Things were getting murky

Something didn’t seem quite right

Drug squad were bemused

Dragged Stan in to find out what

Ingredients he’d used


Stan confessed the recipe

Was for glacier mints

Drug squad never lived it down

Folks been laughing since

Minty turkeys took off big

Stan was in the clear

Had a minty Christmas and

A mintier New Year


© Dave Carr 2014


◄ My Bullet

That Shallot ►


Profile image

John Coopey

Fri 19th Dec 2014 22:31

I'm after you!
Is it just me, Dave, or do I see the dead hand of Good King Wenceslas melody ringing through this?
Anyroadup, top notch stuff even if, like Ian, I haven't a clue about Breaking Bad - I'm Homeland myself.

Profile image

Graham Sherwood

Thu 18th Dec 2014 12:53

Great stuff Dave. But be careful you'll have JC after you!

well done,



Profile image

Ian Whiteley

Tue 16th Dec 2014 19:34

great tight rhyming structure - very clever Dave. Read well, as well, at The Old Courts. A 'Breaking Bad' virgin myself, so not sure I'm getting all the references, but works well as a humorous piece even if you don't know the intricacies of the plot. :-)

If you wish to post a comment you must login.

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

Find out more Hide this message