new year, new me.
new year, new me
new year, same old shit, same broken me.
the games they play will never change
the lies they tell will only grow in numbers
and every one
will erode at my happiness
and reduce what could have been mountains
down to only dirt.
i am broken
i used to be
i try to be
but now i am angry
i can feel myself changing
and it only makes the ache inside me grow
because this is not who i want to be
but i dont know how to stop
from taking over.
i have hope
i still have little morning talks
i have my beautiful friends, who are now family
i have the promise of getting help
but it doesnt repair what is broken
its just a longing for change
an idea that maybe one day
I can see the light again.
Maybe my small pile of dust
Can begin to accrete
Into a mountain.
This year im going to fix myself
This year I will not fall into the same trap
I will rely on my friends as if they are family
If I truly am broken beyond repair
At least I can say I tried
New year, new me.