I have lived and worked in Scotland, Australia and, for the past 35 years in Canterbury, South East England. I write what I like to read, and therefore read what I like to write; but no matter how much 'serious' material I write I inevitably swing back to humour as my first and greatest love. Limericks give me the most pleasure and scope, and also the excuse for a certain amount of naughtiness as is expected in this genre. But rest assured anything I submit on this site will be comparatively tame, at least by my standards! Having grown up on a self-inflicted diet of Edward Lear, Ogden Nash & Lewis Carroll, I love to explore the bounds of madness in some of my writings, and have also readily taken to Flash Fiction as an alternative means of expression.
NATIONAL LOTTERY Suppose I won the lottery And suddenly were rich It would change my wife forever; I'd divorce the nagging bitch All my old acquaintances I hadn't seen for years Would be suddenly 'just passing' And invite me out for beers And what about that bastard Who borrowed my new drill At last he would return it And explain he'd been quite ill My family would rally Distant cousins, unknown nieces Spouting sentimental bullshit About picking up the pieces I'd be offered fast-track entry Through the gates of Heaven's door If I gave the church my money I could live for evermore I would find it so amusing How me.....a piece of trash Could cause the world around me To degrade itself for cash. ---------------------------
All poems are copyright of the originating author. Permission must be obtained before using or performing others' poems.
An Aussie Farmer's Lot. (21/02/2019)
The Spark ! (17/02/2019)
Talking with god (16/02/2019)
Haiku (Thailand) (08/02/2019)
Monochrome Days: (Poetry for Schools) (06/02/2019)
The Cockroach (Poetry for Schools) (05/02/2019)
The Smug Bastard (31/01/2019)
The Gift (Limerick) (28/01/2019)
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