Poetry Blog by Gunnar Payn
Haven’t been happy in so long,
Tryna numb the pain with hits of the bong.
I can’t breathe, these emotions are way too strong.
Find myself isolating, this world is not where I belong.
Been on antidepressants to no avail.
Tried to deceive myself, that was a fail.
Pretended they work, but I’ve been lying.
Constantly find myself awake at 3 am crying.
Thursday 12th March 2020 2:57 am
This life has been painful and filled with sorrow
Spent a lot of nights wishing for no tomorrow
Curating a resume that makes me seem successful
Constantly feeling like I’m not living up to my potential
The pressure I put on myself is unbelievably stressful
Feeling worthless unless I’m chasing a credential
Acting like I’m smart, but I must be faking
Repeating the actions t...
Friday 31st January 2020 3:00 am
The trauma from my past weighs heavy on my soul
Unresolved issues making me feel alone
The pain in my chest been replaced by a dark hole
I feel like I’m living life through apps on my phone.
Night after night insomnia plagues me like a demon,
I’m so exhausted, I can’t take another beatin.
My stomach churns like I haven’t eaten.
Sourpatch Kids my life, I need it to sweet...
Friday 13th December 2019 6:03 pm
Therapy’s been fine but it’s not fixing my problems.
Each week talking about something new, but we never actually solve them.
Mr. Joyce tells me I need to let my emotions pass through me.
But my emotions make me who I am, so I know I need to disagree.
My identity has always been important and, honestly, I identify as depressed.
That as well as anxious, lost, and always stress...
Sunday 29th September 2019 3:02 pm
I’m not a pyromaniac, but my emotions are like a fire.
Not dealing with past trauma because I don’t have what that would require.
So when I find myself alone and fighting the darkness in my head,
I end up saying so many things I wish were never said.
And as I look around at all the bridges that I’ve burned,
I know that by now, I really should have learned.
And as the smoke clears and my la...
Saturday 28th September 2019 3:29 pm