I am at the pit of my breakdown

Saying goodbye to sleep I once loved

Food I could once eat without nausea 

Dreams 

That once allowed rest

Help me 

I pray 

Sitting on the floor sobbing 

Do I allow this pain to make me human

Or wish it away?

I bring these matters to You 

I cannot do it alone 

I’m still processing 

Picking out the safest part...

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the forgiving

are also, it seems, 

the confused

we can't quite figure out who to blame

we just know, it can't be ourselves

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When we were children, if things hurt us we would stop

Pricking fingers on roses, desperate to feel its softness, to smell it

We would be curious and we would get hurt and we would learn a lesson from that 

But as I've grown older

I've hurt myself further

I've clung to what we were as if I was gripping a rockface in a heavy storm

sometimes the storm wins

Everytime I ...

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