It’s the weighted chest pain

That’s hardest to explain 

The interwoven, the lingering

It spins a web across every day

It’s the fog you learn to see through

Because you can’t get away 

Never the needle in your eye

The thorn in your side

It’s the routine of soft pain 

The clingy sting for life 

It’s the dull ache

Freedom, but on a leash

Your mother's kiss with tee...

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It reaches further than "please fuck me" or "don’t touch me"

It’s a liminal in-between 

A line we like to call blurry

But I never asked you to undress me

My body abandoned me

My words went slurry

Tongue too thick to go beyond a mumble

Kind sir escorted me to save me from stumble

Four times play on my mind

One of them I even forgot

Until it accosted me during a usual d...

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I wrestled you down

Girl

Into woman

I grew your thoughts for you

Lifeless of the party

Monotone 

You vacuum expression

And drain me,

Exhausted

Stop

I gave you emotions

Give me energy

Any kind just give

Give and give 

I must drink

Always thirsty am I

But I drink for you

So what’s this lull in your throat

Dip in your tone

Crack? 

No

You ...

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Imagine being totally untethered

After feeling chain linked 

I feel split

That part removed 

That half is trying to renew

But it hurts 

To grow scab over wound 

Missing you is mourning you 

Leaving you is still losing you

And I’m just as lost

As I made you 

If it could be 

I would make it be 

Should I be chain linked again 

I would make it good 

Should ...

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I’ve peeled off my skin for you 

I’ve let you crunch my bones,

Consume beyond my flesh

Beyond my visceral tissues

Beyond my beating heart

Beyond the fibres of my being

Down to my soul

I’ve let you gobble up my spirit

I’ve let you slurp up my mind

Lick the lasting crumbs

of my emotions

Everything in me

Everything making me, me

All that constructs me

All...

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Real love is life threatening 

It’s not serene, sweet, dream love

It’s not romantic, rainbow love

No

True love is torture 

Gut wrenching pain

Hands and knees, love 

Need it to breathe, love 

It’s enough to put you away, love 

But never pull you away, love 

It’s masochistically addictive 

It titillates and irritates

Possesses every bit 

Until you have a fit

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When she folded into herself

You all looked away

When she unraveled

You all watched

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SMASH!

Every time the glass of your skull

Crashes into the fist of another memory

To crush you where you stand

Because another memory has broken you

Because another memory has entered you

Like intruders, they force their way inside

They punch their way into your attention

They invade your heart

Until you must look at them

All so that they can violate you again

They...

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I know I traded something

A part of me

For the splendid splendour of money

I did that thing you shouldn’t do

I gave myself to him

You know, the soul

Cut a piece of myself out for him

You know, the heart

I cut a piece of myself off for him

(You know which part)

But I didn't feel a thing

I'm waiting to miss it

Miss this

Thing

I'm waiting for the pain

You...

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Her skin can open up like a mouth

It can speak

When it parts

It can extend like a tongue

It can taste

Your arteries are seams

Try to unpeel them

Slip off your flesh

Undress

Search your pores

For secret trap doors

Let the inside out

Part it like a mouth

Like hers

It can speak

Unfold the red carpets

Of rolled and folded tongue

Let it searc...

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Do you remember how we used to savour the pins and needles on our tongues?

Do you remember how we used to bite into bitterness?

lick the spit of life

I was turned on by brokenness

maybe it’s cliche

that I craved pain

swallowing broken bottles

it's lined my pockets

it's swollen my stomach

Do you remember when we saw ‘sad’ as just another crayon

to colour ourselves in w...

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I think I hung myself in your tears

Yeah, the other day I realised

One noose, one tear drop - same shape.

I choked on the salt of it

eternally thirsty now

When they fell from your eyes

they looked like showers of broken glass

How I wished I could have swallowed that instead

I think that would hurt less

I’ve got 6 bruises, 7 cuts, 3 scars

I’m still counting.

But why...

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I can’t tell you.

But last night, you entered my chest

for play, some kind of game, like ‘Operation’

and then I couldn’t sleep

I jolted – shivered – jerked – quirked,

now my eyes don’t close

and my body is a pulse,

you tiptoed across my ribcage,

leaving foot prints enlaced by landmines,

you slept on my lungs,

short wired my arteries,

you clipped the circuits of my ...

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Eyes and lips
which
blossom from your carved face,
sugar skull, sherbert fizz.
To Mr, from Mz,
we really wanted to fuck this.
Turned my brain insane,
my tongue inside
out.

Caught in fog,
in haze, like cloudy lemonade;
a gaze, let's misbehave.
Infatuated,
I won't make it.
Too intense:
this forever pretence,
can't do more pretend.
Beg.

Take a hot hit,
bit by bit,
I got...

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There is a war rallied between our hearts:

some people say love,

other people play love.

But when life becomes a game,

when words can only be spoken by characters,

when breath can only be projected by theatre

then I lose myself...so you lose me....and I risk losing you....

And the curtains fall shut -

Shows over.

And the dice stops rolling -

We lost the bet.

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I think I’m addicted to acting the way,

Behaving the way,

I feel:

Shit.

No, I never meant to-

I-

No, I never intended to-

I-

didn’t set out to break your heart

I think that it came naturally to me...

Snapping those heart strings it’s what

I-

It’s what I’ve always done best.

Affection is a weapon they say,

Charm is a murderer they say,

The blood you lose...

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Inspired by Nirvana's song 'heart-shaped box'. The line "I want to eat your cancer" was so strong and powerful, really got me thinking

I want to eat your cancer,

Sip your darkness, your evils,

Drink from your chalice of disease,

Soak up your pain, bathe in it, wash in it...

So that you are dry.

And when you are too dry;

Powdery, breaking, crumbling,

Ill offer you a dri...

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