I really don't know how to expand on that line. I just jotted it down like that. In court one day a dad called his daughter a whore as they were walking out and it shocked me to the core. I wanted to capture as much of that shock as possible in the poem. I have no idea why he called her that, so I just tried to write a story around it.

What would you do to it? I really don't know where to go with it and still keep that shocking edge to it, I almost wanted it offensive, I was offended when I heard it.

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Greg,
Only just noticed.
You left me a comment - Wigan or Blackpool?
I think the answer is Blackburn. I assume it was about my team's relegation prospects. Doesn't look good for the coming season though.
Dave

Comment is about Greg Freeman (poet profile)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Good evening John.
put that whisky down
and please accept my thanks for commenting on
'Morbid Disturbance'

Stef.

Comment is about John Embley (poet profile)

Original item by John Embley

Hi Cynthia, re; 'Etchings', perhaps I confused the issue here, under the class system my forebears would have received pittances for a salary, whereas the posh types lived high life styles at the expense of others. That was the point I was trying to make perhaps not too successfully I think and without a focus on the cost of a grave in particular. Many thanks for your comments.

Many thanks for your comments also on Claws, Gondwanaland, Solitary and Vespula Vulgaris about which I have replied individually.

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Hi Laura, thanks indeed for commenting on 'What the Master Saw'. I think the fetish went beyond him just liking stale working class women - Cullwick saw herself very much in the role of slave (a kind of low grade S&M) and she literally liked licking his boots.

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Cheers Laura.

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Thanks for your comments Ann.

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Thanks for commenting Dave. I read your piece on the walk with asylum seekers, you do yourself a disservice. It is important that you have used your considerable skill as a writer to write against the grain, so to speak, and give an insight into what it means to be an asylum seeker. Too many people believe the crap churned out in the tabloid press.

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Thanks Ann for comment on Invocation. Can't possibly tell you what happened to the blacksmith's baby daughter. Too grim. ;)

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Hi Steve and welcome to WOL. The Dead Man Speaks to his Daughter, lovely, very moving, made me think of my dad. Thank you.

Comment is about STEVE RUDD (poet profile)

Original item by STEVE RUDD

Howya Andy? Thanks for all your comments man, always like to read them and no none of me stuff is published or anything. But I'll keep trying anyway.

Comment is about Andy N (poet profile)

Original item by Andy N

Thank you for your kind words, Andy. It was a pleasure to meet you and everyone at Guitar and Verse; I've been made to feel very welcome at both G'nV and WOL so I'd love to perform at Butterflies again if you'll have me!

Comment is about Andy N (poet profile)

Original item by Andy N

John - thanks for commenting on "The Fairies in the Backs".
I assume, like me, you played Union. I always thought it a hard game but having more recently watched League a lot at local dog-shit pitch level it's nothing! League is just plain dirty.
When I was a student at Durham we played a lot of the local teams, all keen to give the poncy students a bit of a "welcome". I recollect a couple of Railwaymen's teams from Darlington were a bit feisty!

Comment is about John Embley (poet profile)

Original item by John Embley

Thanks for your comment on Whitechapel Ladies. The first part is a bit like the old folk tune Adeiu Spanish Ladies, which just popped into my head. The chorus is just a bit of a mess trying to fit in all the names. I wanted to pay tribute to some of the women murdered over the years, from Jack the Ripper victims, Yorkshire Ripper victims, the Soham girls, Suffolk Strangler victims, Milly Dowler, Jill Dando and Suzy Lamplugh.

Comment is about John Embley (poet profile)

Original item by John Embley

Thanks for your thoughts on "The Ghost of White Hart Lane". It's an old post but gets me on the scoresheet until I do something new on the theme.
I have the deepest respect for anyone who knows what their team is going to win at the atart of each season. In Bolton and Tottenham's case - nothing! Everton too - (Dave Bradley blogged).
Deep respect to a fellow sufferer.

Comment is about Jeffarama! (poet profile)

Original item by Jeffarama!

Dave
Thanks for your thoughts on "The Ghost of White Hart Lane". It's an old post, but it put me on for the "Ghost" theme until I did something new. (Alison has widened it to goblins and fairies etc so I've just blogged "The Fairies in the Backs" - a bit of a stretch, I know!).
I too am old enough to have seen John White but don't know if I did. I saw Spurs a couple of times in the early 60's at Forest (I'm from Nottingham originallY). He might have played.
Anyway, glad you enjoyed it.

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Hi Isobel;

thanks for the comment over Ticket to Ride.

Glad you like it.

Must admit, it's one of my more recent favourites, but as always when I blog I was worried people wouldn't get what I was writing about.. lol

Hope you are good and see you soon (I'm off the scene now for a few months - having a well deserved break)

Cheers

Andy N x

Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)

Original item by Isobel

Hi Laura;

Thanks for the comment over 'Ticket to Ride'. I'll defo have to amend the typo as I am a bugger for them.

Severed Sun actually began off as a typo which I sorta liked and stuck with. You are dead right about the context of the piece.

See you Soon (I'm resting until September / October from properly performing)

Andy N x

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Hi Jeff - thanks for the comments over Ticket to Ride... As stated somewhere else, this was a poem that was a pleasure to write and hopefully didn't leave you in too much of a mystery! lol

Comment is about Jeffarama! (poet profile)

Original item by Jeffarama!

Thankyou Mark for finding something within my poem Sandcastles..much appreciated :))

Comment is about Mark Mr T Thompson (poet profile)

Original item by Mark Mr T Thompson

hi Isobel...mmm was in a soppy mood.. :))

Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)

Original item by Isobel

Many thanks Laura for taking time with Sandcastles...oh those times when small children can play all day...thanks again Laura :)

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

John...thanks for leaving a comment on Sandcastles...yes summers were endless and Christmas never came around...now there seems to be two Christmases and summer has gone on vacation lol

Comment is about John Embley (poet profile)

Original item by John Embley

Dave..glad you liked Sancastles :)

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Hiya Jeff thanks for the comment left on my write Sandcastles..much appreciated...gonna try to get further afield to some other venues :)

Comment is about Jeffarama! (poet profile)

Original item by Jeffarama!

I enjoyed the poetry : )

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

At the sound of my foghorn-look out! Thanks very much Ann for approving of the cathedral climbing lark poem.I am most grateful.Stef.x

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Hi Ann, I was surprised to find so much on the web about these two - a strange take on sexual attitudes by both parties - sad ending too and I haven't even read my book yet. Will save the youtube 'til later. x

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Hi Ann, Re; What the Master Saw - well remembered - am just starting to read a book called 'Love and Dirt' which features Arthur Munby and Hannah Cullwick. Picked it up on the local library bargain shelf having recognised the man's face who is featured at our local Wetherspoon's. Thanks for commenting.

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Welcome to WOL. I have read all your poems on here and I think they are interesting and full of passion.

Comment is about SPACEGHOST (poet profile)

Original item by SPACEGHOST

I dare you to write one about a solar panel!

Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)

Original item by Winston Plowes

Hi, Ann, and thanks for the comments on 'Eye of the Beholder' -- I agree about the equality of all creatures, as well! Sometimes, other creatures don't, though ... I once had a cat who thought she was God, and we've now got a blackbird, 'Enry Cooper, in the garden, who thinks he owns the place ...

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Hi Nikki , Welcome aboard. hope you enjoy the site. Winston

Comment is about Nikki Whittall (poet profile)

Original item by Nikki Whittall

Thanks Win for your comment on Delicate! ( http://www.writeoutloud.net/public/blogentry.php?blogentryid=22326#page_comment_77605 ) I don't think I like how each stanza ends with a full stop - it seems to ruin the flow a bit...

I'll have a look at it, and decide, but critical feedback is welcome.

Comment is about Winston Plowes (poet profile)

Original item by Winston Plowes

Re; Hi Cynthia, re; my Palm Logo and tropical setting, I never got to Bermuda in my sea-faring days but did reach Jamaica, Trinidad, Curacao and Aruba plus other exotic parts, which the logo I use reminds me of.

Have had 'other worldly' experiences too.

Am doing a lot of reading just now including a book post the American Revolution and how loyalists to the British crown left USA to populate places like Bermuda, helped to shape Canada as we know it today as well - its helping me to understand quite a lot about the period.

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

I can see your point... Maybe if we were ugly and everyone else was blind? Although that might backfire into an awful lot of work and no play.

Comment is about Kealan Coady (poet profile)

Original item by Kealan Coady

You are a tonic, Mate. Thanks for the reply.

Comment is about Tommy Carroll (poet profile)

Original item by Tommy Carroll

thanks for the comment there but blind or not, we are just varying shapes and forms, and I'd rather be ugly than blind

Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)

Original item by Isobel

Hi Neil, thank you for your comments. How you liking WOL?

Comment is about Neil Fawcett (poet profile)

Original item by Neil Fawcett

Hi Jeff. Thank you for your comments mate. x

Comment is about Jeffarama! (poet profile)

Original item by Jeffarama!

Comment is about Ann Foxglove (poet profile)

Original item by Ann Foxglove

Hi Alison, thanx for your comment, it can be a cruel place, glad you didn't get stuck! Glad you like it, by the way I had started to write it then your ghost theme came up so very well timed! Keep up your good work Jeff X

Comment is about Alison Smiles (poet profile)

Original item by Alison Smiles

...and thus it goes.

LET ME EXPLAIN...

(and thus it goes. My brain interposing with drivel...)
and sometimes the words come out wardback and shus instead of 'thus' but should come out frontward...'Thus'
( I tire of this consious senility, this humour by disguise...)
...with lost inflection and missing adverbs splet not spelt...
( and so it goes...)

and...thus it goes.

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

Aye no worries chuck - hope you enjoy :) DEAD interesting!

Comment is about John Embley (poet profile)

Original item by John Embley

I'm actually a well established tap dancer in parts of Asia. Yeah I see what ya mean with good or bad being a matter of perception. But I've been rejected by pretty much every small press publisher in this hemisphere. Thats what I meant with reguards to my stuff and yeah I've tried a few different styles. Cinquain, syllabic but I try not get too engaged in one style as diversity keeps it interesting, if not for anyone else then for meself at least.

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Hi Laura -- thanks for commenting on 'Eye of the Beholder' -- I've just been on MSN chat with my daughter in Canada, who did ecology at Bangor, and she reckons she has a book on the Gaia theory left in our loft, so I'll go take a peek this weekend, and see if I can find it. I've heard of it, of course, but my background's mainly maths, engineering and physics, so I've tended to steer clear of such stuff, until recently, p'raps when I started feeling poetic, eh?.
Ta for the pointer!

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Hi again - thanks for replying so soon

What do you think defines 'good' though? Or 'bad'? And who are you going to take that from - yourself, or others? And then...which others? Beware of deification! You have a powerful imagination and intellect - it's not about being better, or worse. It's about your words.

Have you tried writing within certain structures like, say, haiku, ghazal, the diamond stuff that Cynthia is playing with at the mo?

I know what you mean about certain styles being easier to write in. I find that a lot of mine end up being in a musical rhythm - trying to fight against it all the time but it falls out that way. I use haikus to break me out of it.

I think you need to be more courageous about your own work, to recognise if it FEELS good when you write and read it. All the ideas and imagery you're packing in at the moment - it's dense as fuck. You must surely see some merit in that?

Anyhow - keep on writing - not that you could do anything else, I'm sure ;)

Comment is about Kealan Coady (poet profile)

Original item by Kealan Coady

Thanks for the comments laura. Im just not a very good editor. Im not sure whats good and whats not. So I just throw them up here. I kinda try out a few different styles, this one at the moment seems easy to write so I'm gunna stay on it. But thanks again for the comments.

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Cheers Dave, honesty is very important to me in all things.

Glad you liked the piece xXx

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

Original item by Dave Bradley