ok freeman sir...i will remember your advice...thanks a lot for your valuable advice

Comment is about SATYAJIT BEHERA (poet profile)

Original item by SATYAJIT BEHERA

" Early January Snow Blues" is very beautiful. I love "gritting".

Comment is about Andy N (poet profile)

Original item by Andy N

I love this poem's force, but would have ended at "but not this time".

Comment is about Lydia (poet profile)

Original item by Lydia

I'm probably the wrong person to ask for critical feedback, Satyajit. I will admit that I'm not very good at receiving it myself, and so I hesitate to hand it out. Recently I had a small poem published in a magazine, but before it went in, the editor wrote to me suggesting a number of changes, to almost every line. She did not insist on them and I said No to most. But some I agreed to, because I felt they were an improvement. Even so, when it appeared in the magazine, it did not feel quite like my poem anymore.
What I would say is this: look at every word in your poem, and ask yourself, does it add to the meaning? Or is it being lazy? If you took it out, would doing that actually improve the poem? We can all usually find words like that in our poems, that aren't doing any work in the poem or helping its meaning, if we go back and look again a few days after writing them. Good luck!

Comment is about SATYAJIT BEHERA (poet profile)

Original item by SATYAJIT BEHERA

thank u...charles sir

Comment is about SATYAJIT BEHERA (poet profile)

Original item by SATYAJIT BEHERA

Fine work.

Comment is about SATYAJIT BEHERA (poet profile)

Original item by SATYAJIT BEHERA

thanks sir...i owe your advise to join this site...
and i will be grateful if you can point any of my mistakes...so dat i can develope

Comment is about SATYAJIT BEHERA (poet profile)

Original item by SATYAJIT BEHERA

Welcome to Write Out Loud, Satyajit! I enjoyed your poem, and the moment your eyes met while you were writing about her.

Comment is about SATYAJIT BEHERA (poet profile)

Original item by SATYAJIT BEHERA

Loved " Woman", and its heartbreaking last line.

Comment is about Paulyn Lloyd (poet profile)

Original item by Paulyn Lloyd

Like this poem, and its truthfulness, very much.

Comment is about Edie Hope (poet profile)

Original item by Edie Hope

"Quake South Island" is stunning and a privilege to read.

Comment is about Claire Booker (poet profile)

Original item by Claire Booker

"When Thatcher Died" is brilliant work; thank you.

Comment is about Ian O'Brien (poet profile)

Original item by Ian O'Brien

" Camellia" is a deeply beautiful work.

Comment is about J.S.Watts (poet profile)

Original item by J.S.Watts

Love "curled like an idol moon".

Comment is about Linda Cosgriff (poet profile)

Original item by Linda Cosgriff

" 3 D Printer" is wonderful.

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Love this vibrant poem, so humane.

Comment is about Mark Mr T Thompson (poet profile)

Original item by Mark Mr T Thompson

Love this work.

Comment is about Sarah James (poet profile)

Original item by Sarah James

Love this poem.

Comment is about Anne Maney (poet profile)

Original item by Anne Maney

"Saltfish English" is marvelous. I loved this poem.

Comment is about Marcia Calame (poet profile)

Original item by Marcia Calame

Thanks for your comment on 'Weather Crossword' Andy. I appreciate it. Cheers - David.

Comment is about Andy N (poet profile)

Original item by Andy N

Thank you for your service. My late father was stationed in London throughout the Second World War with the OSS, and the city's bombing. He said his handprints were on every sidewalk of London. He asked me once if I understood how Britain survived the war, and when I was silent, said, "because the whole People are valiant."

Comment is about terry ireland (poet profile)

Original item by terry ireland

Go away MCN

Removed your comment - stop trying to show off

Comment is about M.C. Newberry (poet profile)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Haha - loving the new profile pic :D

And exactly, re chips/JCC. Bloody hell, it's not like he's advertising arms or owt is it?!

Comment is about Ian Whiteley (poet profile)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

thanks, once again, for your kind and supportive comments on the JCC thing Laura - totally agree with you about the 'chips' thing, he deserves it - we'd all give our right arms to make that sort of money out of poetry - it's only the snobs who think you should forever suffer for your 'art' lol :-)
Ta
Ian

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

thanks for the kind comment on 'dust' starfish - much appreciated as always
Ian

Comment is about Starfish (poet profile)

Original item by Starfish

thanks for the kind comments on 'dust' Isobel - yes, I was pleased with that ending which just dropped upon me, unplanned, from the....dust :-)
Cheers
Ian

Comment is about Isobel (poet profile)

Original item by Isobel

thanks for the kind comments on 'dust' marksy - much appreciated mate
Ian

Comment is about Marksy (poet profile)

Original item by Marksy

thanks for your kind comments on 'dust' Dave - it's a real pity when you write something that you think is profound only to find that someone else had the idea a long while ago :-( still - great minds think alike I suppose - and they do say that no idea is ever really unique

also - a big thanks for your kind comments on the JCC poem Dave - much appreciated as always

Ian

Comment is about Dave Bradley (poet profile)

Original item by Dave Bradley

Howdy Cynth!

Many thanks for your lovely note on 'Fragment'. Can't begin to tell you how strong and euphoric the feeling was. The hypnagogic state is very similar to an opiated one, and I think that led to the feelings. I've tried in the past to teeter within the hypnagogic state as I find it so immensely pleasurable, but it's a contrary beast and will not be controlled easily ha :D

Yes - I would agree completely with you about the different layers of poetry and its reception. Sometimes I think a piece isn't 'good enough' to blog, and then I think 'well, this was such a strong thing within me, and it's not as 'good' as X or Y or Z, in a certain way, but that's because it is a DIFFERENT animal altogether'. So I blog it, and be damned haha ;D

Anyway, thanks again :)

Comment is about Cynthia Buell Thomas (poet profile)

Original item by Cynthia Buell Thomas

I love this poem, and the way it unconsciously ( perhaps) reflects modern physics.

Comment is about Geraldine Monk (poet profile)

Original item by Geraldine Monk

"Song to the Sea" is stirring and deeply touching. The fourth stanza knocked me off my feet- to my eyes, a single poem.

Comment is about Fay Roberts (poet profile)

Original item by Fay Roberts

beautiful poem

Comment is about Adam Lowe (poet profile)

Original item by Adam Lowe

Hi
My neighbours cat disappeared and was found much later curled in a ball under the stairs dead. I think they find a quiet place when they are ill. Fortunately, the field mouse was a figment of my imagination.

Comment is about Steve Higgins (poet profile)

Original item by Steve Higgins

Hey Starfish,
The cat poem is a true story. Came home from work one day and was making a cuppa, looking out through the kitchen window onto the street. Our neighbours cat had a stretch, had a good look around and went to sleep under their tree. Later on various screams and tears were heard and I asked next door what was going on and they said the lady opposite came home and found her cat dead curled up under the tree. I prefer to think, romantically perhaps, that the cat knew the end was nigh and took his leave of life in a calm feline way. Not a bad way to go. Much better than the poor old field mouse . . .
Steve

Comment is about Starfish (poet profile)

Original item by Starfish

Every worthwhile writer borrows. It is amazing how inspiration can be encouraged by the most(I nearly tapped in "moist"!) unlikely places. I found myself undergoing an MRI scan earlier during which I was placed in something resembling a torpedo tube for 40 minutes and occupied the time making up songs to the sounds of the various weird noises the machine emitted. Don't see a hit in any of them, though!! :-)
Cheers - and thanks, as always, for the lift your work provides. Such a pleasant change to be positive and mean it when knowing of the fractious precious types on WOL who trot out insults like "troll" at the drop of a hat when the comments are not the 100% approbation they seek. Your latest piece on the Daily Mail was interesting, but that newspaper is a byword for emotive stuff that plays to those who think the country has gone to the dogs since WW2. The BBC can't let a week go by without featuring the title in one of its programmes...and not appreciatively! Check "Mock The Week" and "Have I Got News For You", as well as some dramas of late. What fun!!!

Comment is about John Coopey (poet profile)

Original item by John Coopey

Hello John
Re: Cottage Sleaze, I was referring to an earlier comment. Certainly, a beautifully written piece, though. Starfish.

Comment is about John Coopey (poet profile)

Original item by John Coopey

Deeply beautiful impressionism

Comment is about Carla Tombacco (poet profile)

Original item by Carla Tombacco

Hello Starfish,
When I wrote "Cottage Sleaze" the word "beautiful" didn't seem the most apt description! You will gather that not all the lines are my own. (And, No, I did not do a lot of research for this).

Comment is about Starfish (poet profile)

Original item by Starfish

Hello Steve,
Many thanks for your kind thoughts on "Cottage Sleaze".

Comment is about Steve Higgins (poet profile)

Original item by Steve Higgins

Hello MC,
Glad you enjoyed "Cottage Sleaze". I have to confess that some of the lines were not entirely my own!

Comment is about M.C. Newberry (poet profile)

Original item by M.C. Newberry

Thanks for commenting on "Cottage Sleaze", Simon. I'm rather proud that it evokes a certain odour!

Comment is about Marksy (poet profile)

Original item by Marksy

Hello Laura,
Glad you enjoyed "Cottage Sleaze". As I said in one of my comments, cottages hold a special place in my memory. I was fondled in one when I was a youngster while the bloke wanked off into the next cubicle. As I said, it was rather thrilling and he gave me a 10/- note for it. Happy days.

Comment is about Laura Taylor (poet profile)

Original item by Laura Taylor

Hello Greg,
Honours shared at the weekend.
Glad you enjoyed "Cottage Sleaze" and weren't too put off by the racist stuff. It would be a rare cottage indeed which contained politically correct graffiti.

Comment is about Greg Freeman (poet profile)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Hello Ian,
Glad you enjoyed "Cottage Sleaze". I rather liked the idea of ramming something so sleazy into the joyous and bouncy form.

Comment is about Ian Whiteley (poet profile)

Original item by Ian Whiteley

Hello Harry, obliged for your comments on 'The Magnificent Seven'. Woking really is an eternal Topsy-Turvy Town, always awash with builder's rubble etc. CHEERS.

Comment is about Harry O`N eill (poet profile)

Original item by Harry O`N eill

Enjoyed "Date" very much.

Comment is about Julia Deakin (poet profile)

Original item by Julia Deakin

Hey Ged
Thank you for your beautiful comment on my write 'Thoughts'.

Best wishes
Ankita

Comment is about Ged Thompson (poet profile)

Original item by Ged Thompson

Very true

Comment is about Katie Sandham (poet profile)

Original item by Katie Sandham

Poetry Please favourites/Edward Thomas...etc.
I consider differences of opinion a healthy
sign in any worthwhile society. But the
curmudgeon in me has no difficulty in jousting
with the self-righteous, self-serving and self-pitying who use poetry as their vehicle. BUT
you will never find me resorting to abuse
towards those who take ME to task, either for
my poems or a POV...unlike some who it is clear
are quick to delete views they cannot handle and trot out words like "troll" in response, like petulant children.
Carry on disagreeing. You could always be right...
or perhaps not.
Ego argues...wisdom discusses.
Regards
MC

Comment is about Greg Freeman (poet profile)

Original item by Greg Freeman

Harry Thanks for all your feedback, your critique really means a lot and is very valuable to me.

Thanks again

Ged

Comment is about Harry O`N eill (poet profile)

Original item by Harry O`N eill