Donations are essential to keep Write Out Loud going    
profile image

SATYAJIT BEHERA

Updated: Sun, 29 Dec 2013 09:59 am

bsatyajit32@gmail.com

http://poetryatsatyajit.blogspot.in/

Contact via WOL logo

Biography

Myself an undergraduate B.Tech student from NIT,Rourkela,INDIA. Writing poem is my zeal and passion and favourite past time.Usually i love to write on love,friendship and break ups.

Samples

In a dry morning once ever The poem will remind it later, In a journey,a girl i had met Don’t know why i became so tempted, To dedicate a poem over her Who was an unknwon passenger !! I was seated near the window in a coach She came searching a window in same coach, Short heighted she was with slim body I had ever seen such a silent lady, With red and black she was properly dressed Smile on her lips i couldn’t traced, She was silent for a long Enjoying her list of song, For long time i kept on gazing The journey why was so amazing !! When did she opened hair her Seemed as beauty dazzles over her, Again and again she was shaping her hair And I thought beauty her resides there, Eyes though did make contact But they didn’t remain intact, Wishes were two gaze at her I was frightened it won’t hurt her !! The poem i may not present her In future i may not meet her, But the journey was so intresting That made the poem describing, Don’t know why I lost cöntrol To write over an unknown girl, Once she was looking outside Then found gazing at my side, With pen and paper what i was doing Probably it made her confusing !! She may curse,she may slap Seeing a beauty,a poet has right to clap I had not made her my crush Neither i had won her trust, The journey ended without a communication But the girl was still in my sensation; With this my pen did stop And my imagination was gone crushed..

All poems are copyright of the originating author. Permission must be obtained before using or performing others' poems.

Favourite Profiles

Profile image Ann Foxglove

Do you want to be featured here? Submit your profile.

Comments

Profile image

satyajit behera

Sun 27th Oct 2013 04:51

ok mam...actually i am quiet busy now on my academics so unable to giv proper attention here..i will take care of ur advice

Profile image

Ann Foxglove

Thu 24th Oct 2013 16:54

Good for you for putting your poem on the blogs section. I'm sorry you haven't had any other comments yet. People don't seem to make comments as often as they used to on this site. One way to get to know others on here is to make comments on their poems. Good luck with your writing anyway :)

Profile image

satyajit behera

Thu 17th Oct 2013 02:49

thnq mam...i will follow ur advice and soon i will be available in blog section

Profile image

Ann Foxglove

Sun 13th Oct 2013 09:54

Hi Satyajit - a very warm welcome to WOL. I think if you put your poem on the blog section on WOL you might get some more feedback if that's what you would like. I really like your poem. It has real honesty and charm! Hope to read more soon.

Profile image

satyajit behera

Mon 7th Oct 2013 13:37

ok freeman sir...i will remember your advice...thanks a lot for your valuable advice

Profile image

Greg Freeman

Mon 7th Oct 2013 06:02

I'm probably the wrong person to ask for critical feedback, Satyajit. I will admit that I'm not very good at receiving it myself, and so I hesitate to hand it out. Recently I had a small poem published in a magazine, but before it went in, the editor wrote to me suggesting a number of changes, to almost every line. She did not insist on them and I said No to most. But some I agreed to, because I felt they were an improvement. Even so, when it appeared in the magazine, it did not feel quite like my poem anymore.
What I would say is this: look at every word in your poem, and ask yourself, does it add to the meaning? Or is it being lazy? If you took it out, would doing that actually improve the poem? We can all usually find words like that in our poems, that aren't doing any work in the poem or helping its meaning, if we go back and look again a few days after writing them. Good luck!

Profile image

satyajit behera

Sun 6th Oct 2013 16:57

thank u...charles sir

<Deleted User> (11485)

Sun 6th Oct 2013 16:54

Fine work.

Profile image

satyajit behera

Sun 6th Oct 2013 16:24

thanks sir...i owe your advise to join this site...
and i will be grateful if you can point any of my mistakes...so dat i can develope

Profile image

Greg Freeman

Sun 6th Oct 2013 13:33

Welcome to Write Out Loud, Satyajit! I enjoyed your poem, and the moment your eyes met while you were writing about her.

View all comments

If you wish to post a comment you must login.

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

Find out more Hide this message