They loved to do the Palais glide
now it seems they've let things slide,
both recline with swollen ankles,
the slightest conversation wrankles.
Medals line their mantelpiece
a programme cover displaying Grease,
there's still a space where costumes hang
they wore to sing doo lang a lang.
Their style and flair caused much kerfuffle,
now they can barely do the shuffle.
Their presence a whiff of snobbish disdain,
now other smells confirm a stain.
Saturday's a special day
with ecstasy not far away
'cause Strictly's on the box tonight
then everything will seem alright.