With Allah...I can , so i will.
Aspirations...Where we are and where we want to be?
My aspirations have always focused on being a world-renowned, bestselling author, however, i have found great value in fact, total gratification in knowing my pieces help people whether i get paid or not.
Where i come from...where i am...and where i want to be is a constant and ongoing journey.
I have come very far from the young girl who lost her mother, suffering breakdown after breakdown, surviving a suicide attempt and a lifelong battle with clinical depression and anxiety. I have lost everything, my job, my house even my beloved dogs. It took losing everything that meant anything to me to realise how blessed i was. The biggest mistake i made was not making enough shukr for all i had. After all "Allah gives and he takes".
My hardships have humbled me. I dare say it has taught me the true meaning of Sabr(patience) and Imaan (faith). Through all my loss i have learned that Allah will provide we only have to believe. I was literally within arm's length of achieving everything i ever wanted and then another significant loss_ my brother took his own life and as you can imagine i was thrown back into all the darkness.
I have come a long way from that place because although i do struggle every day with depression and anxiety now i see...no i feel the light around me and in me, where before there was only darkness.
Now i only aspire to live a happy and fulfilled life.
I have accepted that Allah has control over everything in my life. I can only do everything i am supposed to but then i have to let go and surrender. Learning to let go has been by far the most difficult aspect in my life Consciously reminding myself to remain positive, search for the bright side regardless of my inner turmoil has indeed brightened up my days and so to my life.
I can build myself up again to where i want to be. i believe and most importantly i trust, so i will. With Allah as my constant companion i will never fail and even if i do...i know now there's always tomorrow, i will get up and try again and therein i am able to regain control...because ultimately we may not be able to control what happens to us, however, we can control how we react and deal with it... and i choose to deal with it ...positively!