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(To some he may have been a creative genius: to me, though, he was just the bloke that stole my piece of lyrical artwork)


Pancake rolls for Table 1

I know they ordered duck but it’s all gone

If they ask you say the soup is just Won-Ton;

Don’t tell them where I get the chicken from

Who’d they think I am? that twat Ken Hom?

And tell them not to slop; that table cloth’s clean on!

I know those prawns have swum a thousand miles

So they’re really second grade

And the beef’s as tough as any boots you’d wear;

Just take their debit card: you think I care?

So? all the meals are from a tin can

Round a pan they’ve just been swirled;

The chow mein tastes like dung

So too the egg foo yung;


Pancake rolls for Table 2

Because we’re out of prawn cashew

Why should I care if they say it tastes like glue?

◄ C&A



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John Coopey

Wed 13th Jan 2016 22:09

It's No. 32 on our local Chinese, Graham.
(Slipped up tonight, haven't we?)

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Graham Sherwood

Wed 13th Jan 2016 20:17

John, don't I remember this getting as high as No7 or was it No 23?

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Vicki Ayers

Wed 13th Jan 2016 19:07

Hmmmmm - ahhhh go on then ;-) x

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John Coopey

Wed 13th Jan 2016 18:16

Thanks, Vicki. Perhaps you'll rub that writing off the wall now?

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Vicki Ayers

Wed 13th Jan 2016 18:04

Oh John this is priceless & your delivery perfect!! Thank you you've made me smile!! xx

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John Coopey

Wed 13th Jan 2016 18:03

Thanks for the thumbs up, MC.
Stu - Yes, a Chinese Take-away song really was a hole in his portfolio. And who wants to hear about an astronaut anyway?

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Stu Buck

Wed 13th Jan 2016 17:35

this is brilliant, especially the audio. ive waited literally hours for a david bowie/chinese take away crossover, and dreams do come true, you rhymed egg foo yung.

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M.C. Newberry

Wed 13th Jan 2016 16:44

There's always space for an oddity as tasty as this!

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