Back Fat

 

I’ve got rolls over my bra but he doesn’t care

He’s not one to talk – he has loads of back hair

Either way you shouldn’t be able to grab a person’s back

I loose some weight then he’ll back, sack and crack

 

I leave the toilet seat down but he does not fret

He just pisses on the ring and leaves it wet

Either way we argue over the state of the bowel

If I leave the seat up then he’ll piss in the hole

 

I’ve got no common sense but he does not mind

He once poohed in public and used a nettle on his behind

Either way loosing at Trivial Pursuit is not an issue

If I wasn’t so thick then he’d have thought to use a tissue

 

We drive each other mad but we’re as bad as each other

He’s a back seat driver like my dad and I moan just like his mother

But tiffs aside I loves his todger and he’s obsessed with my tits

We share baths, eat pizza and watch corrie together and love each other to bits

 

I can’t cook for toffee but he does not worry

He once put ravioli into a curry

Either way neither will end up winning master chef

If I stop burning toast then he’ll learn to boil an egg

 

I’ve got a crush on Gary Neville but he lets me off

He once shagged a girl who looked like David Hasselhoff

Either way we’ve both got very questionable taste

If I dump him for Neville, he’ll pick his rebound with less haste

 

We drive each other mad but we’re as bad as each other

He’s a back seat driver like my dad and I moans just like his mother

But tiffs aside I love his todger and he’s obsessed with my tits

We share crisps, drink Pinot and watch deep throat together and love each other to bits