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From Beyond a Dream

The ballet dancers swim outside my doors,
And pluck at scarlet fruits behind my eyes;
They pirouette in seven’s, eight’s and nine’s
Then drown in reddened lakes in twenty-four’s.
Their sodden tutu’s, drink them up through straws
And on their bloated bodies, here, do dine -
They make the most delicious cherry wine
So do not think their death was without cause!

Then from their shelled remains, I build a raft,
To sail it down the river painted red -
It scrapes along the purple riverbed
And stirs the lilac dust into its craft.
This ship is built of irony in draught
And nailed together with sugar and lead,
So watch it sink through sadness as I bled
And hear it floating proudly as I laughed!

But then, my laughing stops as she begins -
An ageing harridan sets fires new,
She scores a late sonata before noon
And plays it on her flaming violins.
The screeching of her opus riles the skin,
Igniting all the earth with burning tunes
She lets the world revolve around her moons,

Then desecrates the universe within!


◄ In Limbo

Hitman ►


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Simon Austin

Fri 27th Sep 2013 10:55

Thank you for your feedback, and your kind words - I will take it all on board (the raft) ;)

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John Coopey

Thu 26th Sep 2013 19:56

Thoroughly enjoyed the imagery, Simon. I agree with Graham about the inversions, especially "do dine". I did however like the ambiguity of the dangling modifier created in "I build a raft to sail it down a river painted red". I quite like not knowing whether its the river, the raft or I who's painted red.

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Graham Sherwood

Thu 26th Sep 2013 09:50

This is really an accomplished piece of writing Simon. I'm not too keen on the reversal of some lines to make rhyme (here do dine, set fires new etc) but there really are a lot of clever ideas in this and some wonderful terms.

Good work,


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Simon Austin

Wed 25th Sep 2013 10:01

Thank you very much SW, I'm glad you enjoyed it.

<Deleted User> (9882)

Tue 24th Sep 2013 21:41

fantasy in full and beautiful flow.x

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