TUNNEL
Tumbling end over end down the black nothingness of the tunnel, spinning down breaking my bones, bruising my flesh in a violence of movement.
Now, numb with pain I pass out as all my blood drains from my veins to be replaced by ice-cold fear. I’ve never been so afraid, all I want is peace, to rest, to sleep, to die.
My life is taken up by this tunnel, never ending, controlling my fate, driving me inwards to the core, lost to my cause.
<Deleted User> (5560)
Sun 19th Feb 2012 10:36
I enjoyed this read.I was going in a different direction with my interpretation until I read the final Stanza. My naivity led me towards the literal as to the metaphorical tunnel. A good graphic piece of emotional turmoil.
i like this, but am wondering whether you should remove 'over end down the black nothingness of the tunnel' as you mention tunnel again in the third stanza and also whether the ends in succession work.
but i did enjoy this... A
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nick armbrister
Mon 20th Feb 2012 16:04
hi thanx for comments. its an old 1 from the late 90s. yes i may redo it Andy sometime in the future.