THE TATTOOED LADY

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If she isn’t dead by now she’ll certainly be redundant.  Who’d pay 2/6d to see her at Goose Fair when you can stroll down Donny High Street every sunny day of the week and see any number of that fine town’s sisterhood showing off their disfigurements.

Of course, whether a doxy chooses to blight her body with permanent ink or supernumerary orifi is entirely her ownership; as is the right to call it a disfigurement entirely mine.

On the other hand, if you went for the Donny option you would be seeing real tats.  The Tattooed Lady would have been no more tattooed than her dog had two heads.

But I will add one small rider.  A mate of mine who was in the Navy tells me of one of his shipmates who had two devils tattooed on his bum, shovelling coal into his arsehole. Now I would part with 2/6d to see that on Donny market.

◄ "FOR THESE" SAID THE FATHER "ARE THE THINGS A BOY SHOULD KNOW"

THE LAUGHING POLICEMAN ►

Comments

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Don Matthews

Mon 12th Aug 2019 13:05

You're so gullible John. I've got the map of Australia on mine. Helps in my return if caught wondering around lost. Or is it the Mona Lisa? Must look.......

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John Coopey

Mon 12th Aug 2019 12:46

Did you ever ask him how he knew, Kev? He could have told me he’d got the Sistine Chapel ceiling on his arse, I’d still have taken his word for it.

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kJ Walker

Mon 12th Aug 2019 07:07

My dad was in the navy. He discribed a tattoo of one of his shipmates which featured a hunting scene, with a foxes tail sticking out of his rusty bullet hole.

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John Coopey

Sat 10th Aug 2019 00:13

Thanks for the “Likes”, Jason and Devon.
It begs the question, MC, if my mate took him at his word about it or demanded proof.

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M.C. Newberry

Fri 9th Aug 2019 23:21

The term "coal hole" takes on a very different meaning for me now!

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John Coopey

Fri 9th Aug 2019 12:09

Thankyou, Don, for your observations.

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Don Matthews

Fri 9th Aug 2019 03:58

Wanna watch her
She might get
Snatched up by
The biker set

When you see her
"Are you Gert?"
One I last saw
Wearing skirt?

Don't think she has
Skirt below
Table leant on
Ho ho ho

She does look
Austere, skin bare
Despite the rose
Poked in her hair

Nuf of me
Rambling on
Gert deshabille'd
Sorry John

😛

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John Coopey

Thu 8th Aug 2019 23:59

Not sure, Don. I haven’t seen her this deshabille for a number of years.

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Don Matthews

Thu 8th Aug 2019 23:51

Is that Gert?....

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