My neighbour had a fluffy cat.


My neighbour had a fluffy cat

Cold, aloof and very fat

Now it's dead; her little Clover

Driving home I ran it over

Looks much better now it's flat !


◄ Disorientated (1)

Disorientated (2) ►


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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Fri 25th Jan 2019 12:32

'genteel'? You've got to be joking!

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M.C. Newberry

Sun 20th Jan 2019 15:23

As a fan of Tom Lehrer ("Poisoning pigeons in the park" etc etc.),
I enjoyed this - thanks! I also liked your "Check out how far up it goes" addition in the "Comments" section.
To be sure, laughter is the soul-mate of sadness. Both have their
place in life - each to its time.

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lisa donohoe

Sun 20th Jan 2019 11:59

Dave I am pretty such the jury may laugh this one off..
If not ' may I say I truly have enjoyed my stay

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lisa donohoe

Sun 20th Jan 2019 11:58

Don (haha) im in hysterics....

The passion ended on the mat
Both wore stunned, he forgot his hat
He was a fool
To not wrap his tool.....


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Dave Caplan

Sun 20th Jan 2019 11:50

Don, I don't know what I've started, but I have been preparing my defence for the impending tribunal.

The story goes like this:
It was a hot day
we were in the garden
she was taking my clothes off the washing line
we then went over to the flower bed
a troublesome fast-growing weed had to be dug out !

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Don Matthews

Sun 20th Jan 2019 06:07

She freaked at hot and fat
Upon it she then sat
Until she did no longer freak
Now flat, and that is that

Dave, what have you started? ?

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lisa donohoe

Sun 20th Jan 2019 00:47

She was surprised
At the speed it rise
The little fucker
Nearly took out her eyes


well done dave" nothing beats a good giggle


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Dave Caplan

Sun 20th Jan 2019 00:43

I've heard the names Sal, but have to admit I was mostly too busy propping up bar counters in the '60s to watch much TV.

Lisa; it's 12.30am and it's been nice knowing you. I say this because I will probably be chucked off the site for the following:

She said as she ripped off his clothes
"I'm impressed at the speed which it grows"
"That's nothing," he said
As they both hit the bed
"Check out how far up it goes."

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lisa donohoe

Sun 20th Jan 2019 00:11

Come on dave ' id love to read them... (haha)

Big Sal

Sun 20th Jan 2019 00:04

At the risk of sounding completely asinine - Bill Hicks, maybe with a healthy dash of George Carlin for good measure. ?

I have a feeling this isn't the only limerick of yours that'd I'd greatly enjoy.

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Dave Caplan

Sat 19th Jan 2019 23:58

Thanks Lisa and Big Sal;

Unfortunately I've got plenty more, but many unsuitable for such a genteel audience.

B.S. I'm intrigued to know which comedian?

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lisa donohoe

Sat 19th Jan 2019 23:06

Thank you for the giggle at the expense of the poor flat cat (haha)
Great limerick ??

Big Sal

Sat 19th Jan 2019 22:49

The bathos reminds me of a professional comedian - no joke!

Excellent limerick, David.?

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