IT'S LOUSY ROTTEN CHRISTMAS TIME AGAIN

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The half-term is now over and the kids all back in school

The ashes on the bonfire seem so sad when wet and cool

No sooner have the trick-or-treaters buggered off than then

It’s lousy rotten Christmas time again.

 

The tinsel in shop windows and huge santas look so crass

For Heaven’s sake, you’d think they’d wait and let November pass!

It’s time to hand your hard-earned cash to Asda’s keeping when

It’s lousy rotten Christmas time again.

 

You’ll get presents that’s unwanted such as books you’ll never read

And smelly stuff from aunties that’s all trash you didn’t need

You’ll thank them most politely like you did when you were ten

It’s lousy rotten Christmas time again.

 

Of course, you’ll need to buy a turkey – 30lb should do

It might not fit the oven but Hey! There’s five of you.

There’ll be cooking for the women and washing up for men

It’s lousy rotten Christmas time again.

 

But when the turkey sandwiches lie heavy in your bed

And strange liqueurs you never wanted spin around your head

Then mercifully it’s over – Praise the Lord. Amen.

You might just get through Christmas once again.

◄ BOGBRUSH BEATRIX

TOGETHER ►

Comments

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John Coopey

Sun 3rd Dec 2017 20:31

Many thanks, Cynthia. If there is one time I dislike more than Christmas it's New Year's Eve. All that false bonhomie and listening to a clock telling you you're one year nearer your box.

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Cynthia Buell Thomas

Sun 3rd Dec 2017 18:27

John - Fun! Fun! Fun! True! True! True!

But still - I can't be too 'down on Christmas' when my grand-daughter says, 'It's the best time of the whole year. I LOVE Christmas. You are decorating, aren't you!' It wasn't a question. More like an edict. And she knew I was. Just worrying that 'maybe' I might not - OH HORRIBLE THOUGHT. Besides, I do have some lovely 'things' that see daylight only in December, really valued little treasures that mark my whole lifetime. Enough in itself to mark the season sincerely.

My word, this almost sounds like a 'poem'. Hmmmmmm.

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John Coopey

Sat 2nd Dec 2017 18:27

Many thanks, Tom.

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Tom Doolan

Sat 2nd Dec 2017 12:14

Nice work John. A real performance piece. T 😉

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John Coopey

Fri 1st Dec 2017 22:51

Thanks, MC. I do "curmudgeon" rather well. "All I have to do is act naturally".

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M.C. Newberry

Fri 1st Dec 2017 19:16

Surely one for a platform performance.
I think there's something of this is us adults, especially
with the age-weary mindset that makes us realise it's
never what it used to be. I can think back to Bob Newhart
(or Stan Freberg) and easily imagine each putting this over
in some TV show or other back in the day.
Bah humbug!!

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