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The Invitation

Wrote this for the Birkenhead Park poetry competition, didn't win, but well, never mind eh?

It’s so long since we walked in Birkenhead Park, together

And wandered at will down the paths, or fed ducks on the lake,

And rolled in the grass, or sat under a tree in fine weather

Where light-sabres of sun fight the dark-side, and we lie and wait.


Watch blue, fish-shaped, sky in an ocean of leaves making patterns,
piratical squirrels walk planks in the branches and boughs,
While everyday worries shed gathering weight, and like lanterns
rise up in the freshening air, growing light as the stars.


Time passes…each click of a switch holds us captive, enslaves us.
An electrical fix makes mechanical drones of us all
when we sit at a screen, forever and ever, enacting
an alien dream; its not real, yet it swallows us whole.

Hedgehogs aren’t sonic, they live on the ground and eat insects,
wander the park’s secret night, when there’s no-one about.
This couch will go nowhere, we have many places to see yet,
The park is the entrance; the earth is our home, look around.

Leave your DS behind, turn off the TV and computer,
Fetch your shoes…come with me son, and let us be strangers no more.
We’ll visit the park, have adventures, explore, and play football.
Are you ready to go? Look son, I have opened the door.

◄ Picnic

Goshawk ►

Comments

<Deleted User> (2098)

Mon 8th Jun 2009 13:34

NICE,..pop along to wirral ode show poetry night ,thursday 18th june,the stork hotel ,price street birkenshed,,,bout 830 id love to hear that being read....j

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winston plowes

Sun 7th Jun 2009 19:59

Hi Carol, good luck. in my experience DS dependence can be difficult to cure. Liked many bits in this tale. Liked the end esp, will ring bells for many of us…come with me son, and let us be strangers no more.
We’ll visit the park, have adventures, explore, and play football.
Are you ready to go? Look son, I have opened the door.

Win x

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Isobel

Sun 7th Jun 2009 12:58

Yes - i like this too - some good and unusual imagery - like the piratical squirrels walking the planks and the light-sabres of sun fighting the dark side. You've made me feel a tad guilty for being on the computer though when I should be out there with the kids. On that note...

<Deleted User>

Sun 7th Jun 2009 12:46

that's the spirit ....I have a collection of rejection slips , doesn't mean my work is crap :-) I'm published too .....It's all subjective

I like this - very good


keep writing and keep entering - we are all in the same boat

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