If...

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(I thought Kipling could do with a chuck-on with his attempt)

 

If a man can play away without detection,

If a woman holds a map you know she’s lost;

If a man is lost he’ll never ask direction,

But cannot help but ask how much it cost.

 

If a shower of steaming shit from a skunk’ll

Make you smell much sweeter than a rose;

If my auntie had a prick she’d be my uncle;

If you’d fingers on your feet then they’d be toes.

 

Said Cloughie, “If The Game’s about the Long Ball

Then God would put the pitches in the sky”

When Osborne says, “We’re in this for the long haul”

If a politician’s mouth moves it’s a lie.

◄ In The Bleak Midwinter

The Naming of the Parts ►

Comments

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Harry O'Neill

Fri 7th Dec 2012 21:48


John,

Just had to join in the homage (particularly that `skunk`ll/ uncle`...those things are hard to come by)

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Mike Hilton

Fri 7th Dec 2012 14:46

Excellenty John!
Loved the Cloughie bit.I wonder if he's playing on the great pitch in the sky?

Mike

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M.C. Newberry

Thu 6th Dec 2012 19:17

If your spirits feel kinda droopy
And can't be lifted by John Coopey,
If you contribute to W O L
But don't feel better, truth to tell;
If you consider the Festive Season
Is for wasting money - no other reason;
If you accept life's not much fun
It's plain you're already a man, my son!
P.S. Nice one - especially the Cloughie whine, JC.

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Anthony Emmerson

Thu 6th Dec 2012 12:03

Skunk'll - uncle, that mallet's been busy again I see John! Factual inaccuracy too; ALL politicians talk through their a***s! Tee-hee! (Loving it!)

Regards,
A.E.

tony sheridan

Thu 6th Dec 2012 11:44

Nice one John! Great audio! Take care, Tony.

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