Facebook

by John Coopey

Sunday 14th October 2012 9:53 pm

Would you have gone to museums -

The Science or perhaps Guggengheim?

What did you do before Facebook?

How did you fill out your time?

Maybe you dog went for walkies

Or the kids got took out to play?

What did you do before Facebook?

How did you fill out your day?

How did you fit in employment?

Or even find time for the wife?

What did you do before Facebook?

What did you do with your life?

There’s programmes enough on the telly

Big Brother’s especially dour

You watch in on absolute strangers

Do nothing for hour on hour.

But when I turn on my computer

I find that now I can read

That someone I don’t know’s got pimples

Or been to the toilet and wee’d.

Then someone’ll tell me they’re happy

And somebody else posts they’re sad

Ten minutes later you’re posting again

To tell me you’ve just phoned your dad.

So 5 or 6 times in a morning

You post the banal and inane

What did you do before Facebook

I’m asking myself yet again.

You tell me you’re in Donny Market

Or stuck in a queue in a jeep

Or post me an interesting photo

Of Fido at home fast asleep.

You’ve posted at 4 in the morning

Determined to broadcast your shite

What did you do before Facebook

What did you do through the night?

So what is it that you’re not doing?

What past-time do you now defray?

What did you do before Facebook?

How did you fill out your day?

Comments

John Coopey

Fri 19th Oct 2012 16:04

Francine
Ah, there you are! Hiding all the while on my page and not your own.
Isabel gets it right when she says that the attraction of Facebook is that it's so vaccuous.
Still, I wish I'd invented the bl**dy thing!

Isobel

Wed 17th Oct 2012 20:11

Love it! It survives cos it's so vacuous I think - it doesn't take any effort - whereas creating or doing something does.

In its defence, it's a great way of sharing photos and as a means of advertising venues/events. Sometimes you can have fun on there if you can find like minded people to chew a subject over with.

A lot of the time it's used to post shit on though. If you are having such a nice time playing footie with your children or footsie with your lover, why are you on facebook telling people about it - it can't be so rivettingly good fun, can it?

Lynn Dye

Mon 15th Oct 2012 15:24

Brilliant, this is a cracker, John.
I am on Facebook but I never post banal rubbish to bore people with. I mostly use it to keep up with extended family like nieces, nephews and their families, and friends further away. Still, I have to whizz through it ignoring rubbish though, so what I can't read in an hour a day stays unread!

MC has a point though - what did I do before WOL? Nothing I miss, that's for sure!

M.C. Newberry

Mon 15th Oct 2012 13:02

Having "resigned" from Facebook, I can read this with something approaching impartial delight. The vocal delivery is spot on!
"What did I do before finding WOL?
Sometimes, I wonder, truth to tell;
But when I read the likes of this,
What I did before I do not miss!"

Harry O'Neill

Sun 14th Oct 2012 22:40

John,
I`m not on Facebook...and I feel so friendless! (thank God)

Francine

Sun 14th Oct 2012 22:26

Well, I'll tell ya...
I have wanted to delete fb sooo many times - have deactivated on numerous occasions. I have a love/hate relationship with fb. I only stay because it's a convenient way to keep in touch and contact those I don't see often. There are only very few that I have not met in person, but 'know' them from here - everyone else I know personally.

So there you have it !

Should I post this as my status now?

xx

John Coopey

Sun 14th Oct 2012 22:04

...or foe?

Graham Sherwood

Sun 14th Oct 2012 21:58

Friend??

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