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nimrod

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Nimrod coasts across the bay

heavy as a swan.

I sit on the ruined harbour wall

reporting back.

Lifeboat Day - St Agnes.

 

I drew a picture - a cartoon -

me on a rock

a huge plane flying by

sent it to you.

 

Clearing your home

I come across them all -

cards, drawings, letters.

The doings of the hens, the cats.

 

Now, even Nimrod has flown away...

 

 

loss

◄ gulls

party piece ►

Comments

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Ann Foxglove

Wed 26th Sep 2012 13:29

Thanks guys!

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Gareth Writer-Davies

Tue 25th Sep 2012 23:02

I agree that the last line doesn't quite work-another short verse perhaps? But I like the "story" of the poem and the mystery of whose home you are clearing....

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Ray Miller

Thu 20th Sep 2012 10:57

I like the 2nd verse best, the idea that the plane in view will send the cartoon.
heavy as a swan is very nice
"reporting back" - do you mean reflecting?
The closing line is a bit so-so, poem deserves a better ending.

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