OLD SOLDIERS - a poem for Remembrance Day

Young man - mark them marching by,

Their medals catch the light.

Look and hold your head up high,

You'll see no finer sight.

 

Old men passing in their pride

Were once as young as you.

Now - as then - they're side by side,

But now they're growing few.

 

And should one chance to catch your eye,

Young man, don't look away;

In far-off fields their comrades lie,

But their ghosts march past today.

old soldiersRemembrance

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Comments

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Chris Co

Fri 18th Nov 2011 21:24

This has a hint of Lawrence Binyon about it.
There is music in the mist of desolation- at least there is here!

My Best

Chris

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M.C. Newberry

Wed 9th Nov 2011 17:00

I hear what you say about the last line - but
it helps if you pause just that little bit
longer after "lie" - and read the last line
almost as an afterthought.
I was torn between making it tidier and making
it say what I felt - and the latter won.
Many thanks for the comments.

Alana Spence

Tue 8th Nov 2011 20:45

I enjoyed reading this! I love last line, brings it all together and makes you remember x

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John Coopey

Tue 8th Nov 2011 20:41

Wotcha MC.
Another cracker. Philipos has it about right when he says the brevity and simplicity only enhances its power and poignancy.
I go back far enough to remember the Armistice Day parades being of the young men and the old. Then there seemed to be only old men. How sad there that are young men again.

stella jones

Tue 8th Nov 2011 20:39


Ahh I liked this..it is very effective in it's message :)

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Philipos

Tue 8th Nov 2011 17:59

I really enjoyed this it has a great economy of words without effecting its power. Might I suggest you lose one of the words in the last line of the final stanza, perhaps 'but' to maintain the otherwise excellent flow.

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Nick Coleman

Tue 8th Nov 2011 16:12

This catches well the spirit of the day

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