This onion could make any

man, woman or child cry...

but not with malcontent maliciousness.

No, tears of joy and laughter

bellow like church bells or sumo gongs

from the eyes of his audience.

 

He is without arms or legs,

he's carried on stage

whilst carrying the audience

on his shoulders... if he had any.

He pokes fun at his own impediment,

So charming, he can make a straight face gay.

 

A ruckus of infectious chuckling spreads

as the crowd sings: there's only one funny onion... one funny...