Donations are essential to keep Write Out Loud going    

Ruined plans in Cannes

 ( My very close brush with wealth )


During my long ago agency modelling days

taking part in a photo shoot inside and outside

the Carlton Hotel


given a break I get changed into lesser clothing

covered by a towelling robe

feet flip-flopped

and off I go on my traffic stopping

zebra crossing way

displaying the occasional teasing bum wiggle as I do


down onto the beach

walking through the many widely spread canopied

sun lounging very wealthy lovey dovies

having hand and foot pampering service

from white coated white gloved

cocktails and caviar loaded shoulder high

silver tray bearing waiters

trouser creases sharp enough to cut through

a table leg  

and whose annoyance at my unfamiliar presence

is all too obviously seen in their upwardly rolling eyes  


I eventually get to lower myself into the crystal clear blue sea

swimming a few hundred yards out


swimming to me is like falling off a log in a skimpy bikini

which is what I am wearing


With limbs in a crucifix position

an old and well tanned guy floats looking up at the sky

that is until he sees me

and acknowledges my nearing to him

with a wave from a heavy golden ring on every finger hand

accompanied by what I can only describe as

a wolfishly salivating smile


and that look does not let go!

I don't look back a second time

I go back



once dried off its back to the hotel

where upon entering my room

the bed changing maid drops the bombshell......

pardon me madam 


but I was watching you from the balcony


well I was wondering why you didn't wave back 

to that billionaire who waved to you?


whhhhaaatttt!!? what is his name?

I asked trying to catch my breath

in a failed gold diggers panic


sorry madam but we are not allowed to divulge our clients names

however if you are quick enough

you might catch him taking the launch

back to his huge white yacht anchored offshore

and I'm sure he'll oblige you with his famous autograph


-autograph!? autograph!?

the only signature I want to cosy out of him

is his signature on a wedding certificate!


thats why I'm off to the jetty now!

but madam you haven't changed out of your bikini!

exactly! I reply

before flaunt practising my way to the door

thinking to myself oh please! oh please!

Mr Onassis let it be you!


at the jetty too bloody late! 

all I get to see is the arse end of his departing yacht

and more arse ends

those of the all clothes bereft girls surrounding him

on the after deck swigging what I should have been swigging


and now I'm cursing to myself as I kick

my flip-flops off thinking

where the bloody hell are my running shoes

just when I needed them!





◄ My McMillan Nurse friend

Missing the missing ►


Profile image

David Franks

Sun 28th Apr 2024 20:34

I stayed in Nice last year and used the train to visit Monaco (to add pics to my poem "Monaco & its Railway Loo" - no-longer there, it was a squat loo, standing-out among all the wealth) & Cannes, just after the festival; I really liked the (sand not pebbles) beach you mention Rose but, for what it's worth, I too didn't link-up with a local! Here's a link to the poem & pics, in case you'd like a look -

Profile image

Rose Casserley

Sat 13th Apr 2024 00:40

Modelling agency long long ago true Leon but the rest of this silly story as all would have known is a hundred percent make believe but as long as it gave all who have commented and liked ( thanks ) a laugh then thats all that matters.

M.C.-fantastic film! Lemmon and Curtis looked adorable as ladies and I would have hoped to have been in Jack Lemmons high heels if the ending of this crazy composition had been the same as that in the film

Regards the wearing of a bikini once upon a time yes I would have looked the part

today drinking and fast food and age have changed that-BOO!
Thanks again all.

Rose 💋

Profile image

leon stolgard

Fri 12th Apr 2024 14:12

Such a great laugh Rose but is the mention of a modelling agency true? keep the comedies coming 👍

Bethany Sallis

Thu 11th Apr 2024 22:40

Rose! you had me going, until I read the comments.
This was quite some daydream that you had, for sure,
but nevertheless soooo funny! Thank you.


Profile image

M.C. Newberry

Thu 11th Apr 2024 16:56

Not sure why exactly, but this reminded me of the film "Some
Like It Hot". Forgive me, but I can understand why you in a bikini
might receive a wave from a male fortunate enough to be nearby.

Profile image

Rose Casserley

Thu 11th Apr 2024 10:23

Thanks a lot Holden and Manish for reading and overlooking a few-now corrected typos-and have made a few improvements to

this story from the house of very tall tales 😂
written only for the purposes of daydreaming

Rose 💋

If you wish to post a comment you must login.

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

Find out more Hide this message