“Old Heads on Young Shoulders”! 


”You can’t put old heads on young shoulders!”, they say. 

But I think that I may have ‘come-up’ with a way, 

involving some sawing - and stitching - and glue 

(and a bit of a ‘heads-up’, in just what to do!).  


But, if I decided to give it a ‘bash’, 

that would leave a spare head and a body (to stash)! 

Which seems such a waste of a woman or man.

So, now I’ve developed a much better plan.


There are youngsters, who’ll want to know stuff ‘early on’.

With many an old ‘un, regretting times, gone.

So let’s do some swapping, to fulfil their dreams

with no wastage (and only a few extra seams!).


I’d start with some young ‘uns (enticed from their ‘cliques’).

- ‘Adrenoline-junkies’ all chasing their ‘fix’.

And pair them all off with compatible codgers,

intent on renewing their ‘bits’, bobs and todgers!


And then I’d source bandages, needles and threads,

before getting busy with swapping their heads.

‘Old heads on young shoulders’ and ‘young ones on old’.

(Making sure, they were fastened before they got cold!)


Then, once our brave patients have passed ‘first-inspections’,

the ‘old head-receivers’ have “Botox” injections.

And face-lifts or plumpers, for looking their best

to match their young-bodies (now proudly possessed!).


Conversely, the ’young-heads’ would need something too

- aware that old fogeys are ‘strictly-taboo’.

Subjecting their bods to be nipped and then tucked.

To stop them from looking so wrinkled - and frail !


The ‘oldies’ (of course) would be happy to pay

for a chance to roll-back all those years, in one day.

And, to bring in the ‘Young’, this (for them) would be free

(as it’s really a ‘full-body’ transplant, you see ?).


For, when all is done and they’ve, each convalesced,

the ‘Olds’ would be thrilled with new bodies; so blessed!

But the ‘Youngs’ (so betrayed!) would regret their transplants.

Now, they ache and they fart - through incontinence pants!


So, I think that it’s best to put such thoughts away,

as I wouldn’t wish that on the Youth of Today.

The ‘Wisdom of Age’ should take time to seep through.

Let them ‘find their own feet’ - just like we had to do !

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julie callaghan

Wed 6th Jan 2021 11:37

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