The People I Never Have Met

 

It’s with regret

That as of yet

There’s people that

I’ve never met

I’ve never met an honest Tory

Who isn’t in it for the glory

If you’ve met one, then share his story

On second thoughts, you’d only bore me

My retrospect is circumspect

For people that I’ve never met

 

 

An aunt with cash up in the attic

A caravan that isn’t static

A Democrat, who’s…….. democratic

A stripy leopard, a tiger with spots

Haves who haven’t, or happy have-nots

A castrated cat who’s keen on the vet

The things and people I never have met

 

A cockerel that’s chicken, yet cock of the coop

A bachelor bonged up on Batchelors soup

A loop-the-loop pilot, who’s kept in the loop

A droopy old troopy who cares for his troop

A strawberry blond..  Whose hair is brunette

More of the people that I never have met

 

A nouvelle cuisine chef, whose dinners are hearty

A baron who votes for the socialist party

A long haired Bohemian who’s not arty-farty

A Scouser who NEVER went to school with McCartney

A compulsive gambler who won’t have a bet

Who won’t risk it all, on a game of roulette

Who isn’t too skint, and isn’t in debt

More of the people that I’ve never met

 

A Fleet Street hack that isn’t pissed

No grubby pencil in his fist

Headlines, deadlines never missed

Who’ll stand his round…. if you insist

Who drinks to remember, not to forget

The people that I’ve never met