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(Warning: the audio is unexpurgated)


It’s been a source of some regret that I had missed my chance

To be a superhero with my kecks inside my pants.

I wanted to be Batman and to fight the city’s crime

I’d get hold of The Piddler and I’d make him serve his time.

Or whizz around like Superman, on guard by day and night

Looking out for phone boxes in case my pants got tight.

I’d crush the hardest granite and give sight back to the blind,

My role – to save the planet and the fate of humankind.

Yes, I truly thought this chance had gone as passed my youth has rolled

For now they call me “knocking on” – that’s code for getting old.

But, blow me down, for now I have this opportunity

To lie upon the sofa while at home and watch TV.

It doesn’t seem a tricky task, as in my onesy curled

I surf the Freeview channels in my quest to save the world.

So take a lead from Coopeyman, who doesn’t outdoors roam –

Be a superhero and JUST F*****G STAY AT HOME.

◄ WE DON'T NEED NO VENTILATORS (Brexit Before Breathing)



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Don Matthews

Mon 30th Mar 2020 11:31

Thankyou Cap'n Coopey.....


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John Coopey

Mon 30th Mar 2020 11:02

Stand at ease, Don.

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Don Matthews

Mon 30th Mar 2020 09:14

You missed a word in your last line John

...'flipping well'....also you forgot the extra star..


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John Coopey

Mon 30th Mar 2020 08:40

I think solitary is getting to you, Po. And thanks for the Like, Blackrose.

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Sun 29th Mar 2020 22:48

If you had said there was swearing on your aud... Oh!

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Sun 29th Mar 2020 22:41

Lost for words mate

No, I'm not, but I have pissed off a few because of my topics and style and doom and gloom and the use of expletives, etc.

I have decided to censure myself
Po lied

Fuck it...
If bowdlerization is good enough for the Bard its good enough for me... and you John.

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John Coopey

Sun 29th Mar 2020 21:24

Thanks, Martin.
If only we all got it, Po.

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Sun 29th Mar 2020 20:35

It is very difficult
It is very hard
It is going to get tougher
I know how terrible this for you all

Shut the front door!

How many more times do we have to be told?

I am getting sofa sores... it's like bed sores only ten times worse!

I'm with you John... metaphorically speaking of course!


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Martin Elder

Sun 29th Mar 2020 20:26

Very droll John one of your finest

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